as i begin cardiology
it occurs to me that being who i am is a very weird thing. i feel like i'm in the middle of two different worlds, in very different ways.
i don't feel like i'm moved back to fort wayne yet. i still have to stop and remind myself that i actually live here now.
i don't feel like a real doctor yet. sometimes i do, like when i deliver a baby without any problems or any help. other times, i feel completely lost like i have no idea what i should be doing or what i should be thinking.
i don't feel like a real adult yet, most of the time. a big part of my brain is consumed by wanting to get pregnant and have children, and another part of me feels like such a child that i'll never be ready.
i'm just weird, and that's all. just very weird.
i don't feel like i'm moved back to fort wayne yet. i still have to stop and remind myself that i actually live here now.
i don't feel like a real doctor yet. sometimes i do, like when i deliver a baby without any problems or any help. other times, i feel completely lost like i have no idea what i should be doing or what i should be thinking.
i don't feel like a real adult yet, most of the time. a big part of my brain is consumed by wanting to get pregnant and have children, and another part of me feels like such a child that i'll never be ready.
i'm just weird, and that's all. just very weird.