Such A Pale Jewel...
Sometimes I get so lost I forget to breathe. Sometimes I think I breathe too quickly and I get dizzy. Either way I forget to be myself sometimes, well, most of the time. I trip up and fall. Misery comes to rest and seems to plant itself there. My life is full of lies. Truths?:
1) Sometimes I honestly wish my father would die. As horrible as that sounds its true. I feel like such a terrible person when I feel that way, but it's true. He's cold and cruel and calculating and he seems to forget that fathers are supposed to love their children no matter what.
2) I was molested at 7 by someone I was supposed to trust. Result? I don't trust most people, especially guys. Do I think all people, or more specifically all guys, are evil? No, but I find it easier just to keep my distance. It's harder to get hurt.
3) I find I can't keep my distance from people or pretend I don't care. I can't be that cold and distant.
4) I can never fucking sleep. Damn insomnia.
5) I am not a smoker, but stress makes me want to smoke and I have been more stressed out lately than I thought possible.
6) For the last two weeks I have had a none stop headache. I can barely think and I get sick to my stomach hourly.
7) I need to do a lot of shit before school starts and I am not motivated to do any of it.
8) At the current moment, my life sucks.
1) Sometimes I honestly wish my father would die. As horrible as that sounds its true. I feel like such a terrible person when I feel that way, but it's true. He's cold and cruel and calculating and he seems to forget that fathers are supposed to love their children no matter what.
2) I was molested at 7 by someone I was supposed to trust. Result? I don't trust most people, especially guys. Do I think all people, or more specifically all guys, are evil? No, but I find it easier just to keep my distance. It's harder to get hurt.
3) I find I can't keep my distance from people or pretend I don't care. I can't be that cold and distant.
4) I can never fucking sleep. Damn insomnia.
5) I am not a smoker, but stress makes me want to smoke and I have been more stressed out lately than I thought possible.
6) For the last two weeks I have had a none stop headache. I can barely think and I get sick to my stomach hourly.
7) I need to do a lot of shit before school starts and I am not motivated to do any of it.
8) At the current moment, my life sucks.