(no subject)
man.. today was SO good. late last night, at jarah's house, hope texted me to remind me about vivian hibbert coming to town to do a seminar on prophetic worship at the church we've been going to. so, instead of recording children's songs today with my sis (which i was sad to leave behind), i went to boulder this morning and learned about prophetic worship.
dang.. it was amazing! it's been so long since i've gone to or been around such great teaching. it's so funny, because i really feel that since i've arrived to colorado, god has really 'stripped' a lot of the crap that i put my identity in from me. the last few weeks, i felt as if i've complained to god so much about missing my 'life', missing my 'world', and missing who i was to people. but as much as i do miss my friends and adopted families in west texas, i have to say that i'm thrilled to be starting from scratch.
i'm back to square one by default - and that is so good for me (hell, it's a lot easier than having everything stripped away from me while still being in the middle of it all - if that makes sense??). i feel as though i've kinda reverted back to this 18 year old girl walking into her first day at ministry school, except now, i have an understanding and discernment to not get myself into a 'world center' situation. i feel almost as if there's this blank slate again and i'm just ready and willing to do what i need to do to mature spiritually. this time, i want to do it right; do it the best i can - not that i wasn't before, but i know this time is going to be different.
hmm...
yeah.. different.
the origins community has been so great to hope and i in the past month. i can't believe i'm excited to go to church tomorrow and that i was willing to give up stuff to attend church all day today... i'm not saying this to boast, but i really am amazed at the hunger that's beginning to form in me again.
we were given so much information today at the seminar. vivian talked about so many things that i am intrigued by, believe in, and hope to know more about. the crazy thing is.. is that just last night, i was praying that somehow god would make a way for me to learn to study his word and grow in him on my own time. the way vivian taught was so laid back, so simple, and so easily laid out that now i am confident i can take the stuff she went over today and apply it directly to my life and be able to kinda re-walk myself through it all and really learn it.
man.. i've said it several times already, but this is just so great. i'm beginning to feel excitement again. an excitement i haven't felt in years.
dang.. it was amazing! it's been so long since i've gone to or been around such great teaching. it's so funny, because i really feel that since i've arrived to colorado, god has really 'stripped' a lot of the crap that i put my identity in from me. the last few weeks, i felt as if i've complained to god so much about missing my 'life', missing my 'world', and missing who i was to people. but as much as i do miss my friends and adopted families in west texas, i have to say that i'm thrilled to be starting from scratch.
i'm back to square one by default - and that is so good for me (hell, it's a lot easier than having everything stripped away from me while still being in the middle of it all - if that makes sense??). i feel as though i've kinda reverted back to this 18 year old girl walking into her first day at ministry school, except now, i have an understanding and discernment to not get myself into a 'world center' situation. i feel almost as if there's this blank slate again and i'm just ready and willing to do what i need to do to mature spiritually. this time, i want to do it right; do it the best i can - not that i wasn't before, but i know this time is going to be different.
hmm...
yeah.. different.
the origins community has been so great to hope and i in the past month. i can't believe i'm excited to go to church tomorrow and that i was willing to give up stuff to attend church all day today... i'm not saying this to boast, but i really am amazed at the hunger that's beginning to form in me again.
we were given so much information today at the seminar. vivian talked about so many things that i am intrigued by, believe in, and hope to know more about. the crazy thing is.. is that just last night, i was praying that somehow god would make a way for me to learn to study his word and grow in him on my own time. the way vivian taught was so laid back, so simple, and so easily laid out that now i am confident i can take the stuff she went over today and apply it directly to my life and be able to kinda re-walk myself through it all and really learn it.
man.. i've said it several times already, but this is just so great. i'm beginning to feel excitement again. an excitement i haven't felt in years.