I Love You

[jaymatt]

Title: I Love You
Author: jaymatt
Pairing: Jayma/Matt
Rating: M
Disclaimer: Jaymatt is awesome....sorry if you're offended by that.

She closed her eyes, his lips were moving down her neck at a maddeningly slow pace; every time his flesh connected with her skin she gripped him tighter against herself, she needed more; passion, closer, warmer, hungrier, faster. His tongue ran along the protruding line of her neck as she angled it to allow him total access. Lips landed on her ear, gathering her lobe in his mouth, he bit down lightly as he whispered. “I’ve missed you so much baby.”

Jayma rolled her bottom lip between her teeth, a giggle escaping as a smile graced her face. Her hands left their position on Matt’s back, trailing up his arms over his broad shoulders to cup his face in her hands. She pulled his attention upward. “Yeah?” Her tone was playful and hopeful, and she refused to meet his gaze, instead her eyes concentrated on her thumb as it ran just under his mouth.

A mouth that was getting closer and closer and just before they met he stopped. His eyes locked with hers and he brushed his lips against hers; her eyes slipped closed at the sensation, the anticipation, but he pulled away. He waited until her eyes opened to meet his. There was just something about her eyes; so big, so expressive. And when looking into the deep amber there, he felt fully connected to her. “More than you can imagine.” He watched her cheeks color.

The way he said it, the tone in his voice; it was so husky and sexy, and sounded so sincere. Her heart beat faster, she wanted to believe him. “It seems to me that you had a really nice summer vacation without me…” Her voice trailed off and her eyes left his once again. She knew where he’d gone, what he’d done, and who he was with. And though she knew she had no right to be jealous, she was. The week before she had started work on season four of Glee she’d told herself that she wasn’t going to do this with him anymore, that it was too hard. She’d promised herself she would put an end to it. But here she was, at his home, pushed up against his front door the moment they stepped inside.

She was so nervous when she drove into the usual lot at Paramount. She wasn’t nervous about a new season, or her upcoming scenes, or anything else; she was nervous about seeing Matt. It had been 2 months, 3 weeks and 1 day since she had driven down his driveway, having just said goodbye; his sweat and smell was all over her body. Her skin burned where he had grabbed her thigh, slightly below her ass, at the height of passion. Her fingers played over the sensitive skin just behind her ear; she tilted the rear-view mirror in her direction, coming to a stop at a traffic light, and pushed her hair away while tilting her head as far to the right as she could, her eyes still trained on the mirror. Dark purple. She wouldn’t be wearing her hair up for a few days. She was leaving for Montreal the next day and maybe they had gotten a little carried away; 4 hours tangled together in white sheets, his name echoing off the walls 3 separate times. They had spoken on the phone a few times, but it had been hard to keep in touch like they’d planned; both of their schedules were so busy. It had been 3 weeks since they had last had any contact. But visions of their last night together haunted her throughout the months; the sound of his labored breaths against her cheek, the feel of his teeth clamped around her nipple, and the look of pure lust on his face as he pushed into her, filling her with himself, moaning her name before collapsing down on her. The smell of his skin, the taste of his mouth, the memory of him haunted her for 2 months, 3 weeks, and 1 day.

She looked for him in all the usual places, but couldn’t find him. She wanted to talk to him before they started their first scene together. They were usually so careful; they never talked about their relationship, even in private, on set. But this couldn’t wait. She had to end it now.

She walked toward the choir room set, hoping to find him there. She heard his voice as she neared the room and her breath hitched; he was talking with a PA. It was just the two men in the room, and she stood in the doorway watching him, thankful that most of the cast and crew were on location, shooting a Rachel Berry scene.  Her eyes followed him as he spoke, unaware of her presence; he smiled that lopsided smile and her heart clenched in her chest, this was going to be a lot harder than she’d thought.

Matt had caught a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye and when he turned to see her fully a smile wider than she’d ever seen broke out on his face. She couldn’t help but smile back. His eyes had remained on hers throughout the rest of his conversation with the man in front of him. Soon he left and they were alone. Matt walked closer to her, coming within inches of her; her pulse quickened and she held her breath. He didn’t ask for permission and she didn’t object when his lips crashed down on her, a firm hand tilting the base of her neck into him. Her mouth opened to his immediately and her tongue dueled with his, her body igniting with the desire for him that she’d been so determined to quench.

They’d never done this at work and realization soon washed over Jayma, even while she pulled him closer with her hands in his hair. “We can’t do this here…” She whispered into their kiss.

Their lips slowed and they pulled apart, breathless. Matt looked down into her eyes. “I’ve been waiting for this moment since you left for filming. It’s all I’ve been able to think about.”

Her resolve was gone. She was obsessed with the man standing before her; nothing could keep her away from him. She reached up once again, running a hand through his shorter than usual hair. “Your curls are nearly gone….” She pouted her lip.

“What? You don’t like it?” He faked a shocked expression, his hand running casually through the few curls he did have.

“What am I supposed to grab on to while you’re fucking me Matt?” She deadpanned, catching her bottom lip in her teeth, just the slightest smirk playing on her lips. She loved flirting with him.

His reaction was more than she was anticipating as he pulled her body flush against his. “I’ll grow it out for you, but until then you can grab onto anything you’d like.” All playfulness was gone and his eyes held an intensity she hadn’t seen from him before.

“Matt.” She whispered it, staring up into his eyes. “We shouldn’t be doing this here.”

“Come over. Tonight.” It wasn’t a question.

“I could say the same thing about your summer…” He pushed a few strands of hair out of her face, watching her expression as she caught his meaning. “I wish you would have told me when you were going to be in Paris. I would have extended my stay there. We could have seen each other. We could have snuck off to some small hotel.” He needed to feel her, his hand finding its way under her blouse, caressing the skin there, letting her know what she’d missed.

Her jealous side got the best of her and she spoke before thinking. “I didn’t want to ruin your vacation with ‘Ms. Gorgeous’.” She looked him straight in the eyes, a challenge.

“Really?” His glare matched hers. “Well maybe we should stop this altogether then. Cause if that’s the case then I must be ruining your everyday life and your perfect marriage to ‘Mr. Perfect’.” He pushed her harder against the door, towering over her. “Do you want to end this Jayma?”

His hands gripped her on either side of her ribcage, his thumbs teasing her nipples through the fabric of her blouse. His erection pressed against her lower stomach. “I….”

“If it’s too hard for you, just tell me to stop.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead, then her nose. He grabbed her arms and lifted them above her head holding them there with one arm, trapping her between himself and the door. “Do you want this to be over Jayma?” His lips found the curve of her neck again. He relished in the sound of her labored breathing, the goosebumps under his tongue.

She shook her head ‘no’, unable to find her voice. She didn’t want this to end, she wanted more. Matt didn’t need any more permission before he smashed his body fully against hers, his lips capturing hers, one arm still holding her captive to him, the other wrapped around her back, then lowered to grab onto her ass. She could feel him moving against her, so slowly, so achingly slowly. His grip on her hands was painful, but she loved it. “Sometimes I hate her Matt.” She confessed to him when he pulled away to trail his kisses down her neck and chest.

He came up to meet her stare, “And I hate him every day.” There was pain in both of their eyes, a sadness they hadn’t dared to explore before today. “It could be you, you know. It could be you on my arm, you helping me pick out which suit I should wear, you complaining about my phone ringing and interrupting a dinner; it could be you always, for everything. My everything.”

She looked away, his words were thrilling and terrifying, and she didn’t know what to say.

“Look at me.” He lifted her face, holding her chin in his thumb and index finger. “I want it to be you.” A long exhale left his lungs, tickling the flesh of her neck, and his eyes searched her face. “I lov-“

“Don’t say it!” She pleaded, wiggling against his body, trying to free her hands. “You promised you wouldn’t say it…We had a deal.” She couldn’t let him say those words; she couldn’t let this become that real.

He wasn’t going to keep it in any longer, he wanted to tell her, he’d dreamed of telling her. Matt released her hands, freeing her, and lowered himself to her height so he could look her straight in the eyes. His hands cupped her face and his thumbs wiped away the tears that started to roll down her cheeks and she gripped his arms, ready to push him away. But she didn’t and her grip loosened as he began to speak. “I love you Jayma.” He let the words hang in the air, his eyes never leaving hers. “I love you so much it hurts. I want you to be mine, today and every day.” He stood tall and lowered his forehead against hers, closing his eyes. “I want to share a home with you; I want to walk down the sidewalk holding your hand in mine…” He reached down, intertwining their fingers and squeezing her small hand gently in his larger one. “I want to marry you, I want to have a family with you, and I want to grow old with you.”

“Matt…” Her voice was a mix of a whisper and a moan.

“I know you love me too baby. Tell me you love me too.” His lips moved against her cheek and he pushed himself even closer to her, positioning his knee between her legs.

“We promised…” Her chest was heaving, the anticipation of her inevitable confession almost too much to handle.

“I don’t care what we promised. This is real, it’s happening. You can’t keep pretending it’s not.” He broke their stare and pulled her against him, hugging her to his chest, his face buried in her hair. “If you love me, then tell me. Please.”

Adrenaline peaked and her body began to shake. She did, she loved him so much, but she never thought she would tell him; she never thought she’d open herself up to him, make herself vulnerable to him. Her fists clenched together around his back, her face was smashed against the skin where this shoulder and neck met and she breathed him in. A long shaky exhale left her lungs. “I do love you Matt.” She closed her eyes against his skin, listening to his sigh of relief. “I love you so much.”

Matt pulled his head away, grasping her face in his hands, looking into her eyes. “You love me.”

She smiled despite the seriousness of the moment. “I love you.”

His lips met hers, his tongue seeking immediate entrance and she felt herself being lifted in his arms. She’d missed his arms around her, the feeling of security; his arms made her feel so famine and desired. Her legs anchored herself to him, so tight around his waist. His tongue was intoxicating as it moved along her own; and before she knew it she was being lowered onto his king sized bed.

His entire body was burning for her, he wanted all of her and he wanted it now. It had been too long to be separated from her; his mind had been racked with images of her during the day, and his dreams filled with her at night. He’d walked past a woman at party he’d attended; she had been wearing the same perfume Jayma wore. He’s spent the rest of the night staying as close to her as he could; his eyes slipping closed, imagining Jayma there with him, every time the wind shifted sending the fragrance in his direction. He kneeled on the bed, hovering over her, truly appreciating her presence. Holding his weight with one arm he brought a hand up, brushing it along her face, watching as she turned into it, her eyes slipping closed, her lip captured between teeth. “You’re so sexy.” She turned her head further to the side tempting him with her exposed neck, and he took full advantage; dipping low his tongue ran a line down the flushed skin.

She wanted his mouth on more of her and with both hands she lifted her shirt from her body, tossing it off the bed. She arched her back and he wasted no time. He latched onto one nipple through the lace of her bra while she worked at the clasp under her back. Once free she moaned at the sensation of his hot mouth working so perfectly against her bare skin.

He leaned down and kissed the tip of her breast, and as soon as he did, he instantly craved more and took her erect nipple in his mouth, teasing it with his tongue. Her nails dug into the soft flesh of his back. He moved further down her body. Her taut belly was quivering slowly and he placed his palm on it, almost covering it completely with his large hand. He wanted to touch every part of her, run his hands along every centimeter of her skin, and cradle each one of her curves in his hands. He wanted to feel her heat flush against his palm. As if possessed he yanked her skirt and panties down her legs and tossed them to the floor, his hands returning to where they yearned to be. His pulse quickened at the sweet sound of her moan as his fingers ran along her folds; at the sight of her knuckles turning white as she gripped the sheets in her hands.

He knew her body so well, knew how to make her moan; and she wanted to make him feel just as good. In one motion she pushed him off her; shoving him to his back she straddled his thighs. Her small fingers played with the hem of his t-shirt and she smiled up at him. She pulled the material up his body and over his head, revealing his toned physique. Her hands ran down his protruding abdominal muscles. “I’ve really missed these…” Her tongue darted out to moisten her dry lips. Matt’s grip on her hips tightened and he pulled her to sit over his hardness; he rocked her back and forth and she joined his efforts grinding herself against him slowly, her wetness coating his jeans. She ached for his sex against hers and her fingers went to work unclasping his jeans and pulling the zipper open. She arched her back reaching behind herself; gripping the denim she pulled his pants down to his knees; lifting herself just enough to allow the material to easily slide between them. She cupped him through his boxers, running her fingers ever so softly up his length, twirling her index finger around his head; she watched him twitch, his features forming the perfect vision of impatience as he thrust toward her retreating hands. She pulled his boxers down his legs in the same manner as his pants, and they both bunched up at his knees. She turned her attention back to Matt, staring deep into his eyes and her fist clenched around his erection, his satisfied groan echoing around them. She worked up and down, watching his body react to her.

Control was what he needed, and she was making him lose it. He sat up pulling her body to his, her legs instinctively wrapping around his hips, her ass nestled directly on his thighs. His erection pressed against her core, his hand pulling her face to his. He kissed her so hard he couldn’t breathe; but why would he want to, she was his air. He captured a lip in his teeth, tugging it lightly, and then moving to her neck. With one hand he gripped himself and positioned at her entrance; her arms around his neck tightened, her nails digging into his skin, surely leaving marks that he knew he would cherish for as long as they remained; proof of her intense desire for him. Her hips thrust forward, impatient. “It’s going to feel so good baby, I’ve missed you so much.”

Her breathing hitched and she whimpered at his words. “We can’t be apart that long ever again. I need you to make love to me every day. Make love to me Matt.” Her hips hadn’t ceased their movement and Matt used his free hand to settle her. His grip was tight and painful, stilling her and pulling her forward, closer to him; their bodies smashed together. “Now Matt. Now.” She pleaded with him and his lips found hers to stifle her moans as he pushed into her for the first time in far too long. It was painful, having become unaccustomed to his size, but he stilled allowing her to stretch to him.

Leisurely, deliberately settling into a slow pace, he began to rock his hips up into her wet warmth, sliding all the way out before rocking into her again. Her head collapsed against his shoulder, her body went limp in his arms as she surrendered to him; and he held her securely, planting kisses in her hair.

“Don’t ever stop…” Jayma whispered in his ear as she straightened her back and he groaned in understanding; her arms encircled him and her thrusts began to match his rhythm, a perfect synchronicity. From this angle she could look down into his eyes as they met, thrust for thrust, her body moving up and down; their gazes locked. The pressure was building too soon and she closed her eyes, concentrating on holding her peak at bay.

Matt sensed her change and relief washed over him, knowing he could make her come with him, he wouldn’t have to struggle to hold off; it had been too long. He sped up the rhythm, instantly noticing every change in the way she breathed, louder, the way she bucked her hips, faster; she fell backwards, holding herself up with her hands gripping his thighs behind her. The view of her body arched back, her head fallen in abandonment, her breasts bouncing with her every move, it was a vision he knew he would commit to memory. Reaching up he trailed a hand down the valley of her breasts and the line down the middle of her stomach, before arriving at the bundle of nerves he knew would make her scream his name. He drew circles, slowly at first but quickly increasing as he sensed himself nearing his climax.

“Matt.” Her voice came out in a squeak and she closed her eyes; that unique, unmistakable vibe of orgasm took hold of her, while a raspy moan, coming from deep in her throat started to fill the space around them. His pace became frantic as he thrust up into her, his grunts sounding animalistic. She clutched his shoulders and pulled herself to him once again, her orgasm at its peak; and she watched him come undone, her name a whisper on his lips, filling her completely.

They collapsed into an embrace, each holding the other, providing support as they recovered normal heart patters and even breathing.

“You’re amazing.” Matt ran his hands down the length of her arms; seeking her hands he intertwined their fingers. As gracefully as he could he pulled them into a laying position, kicking his jeans and boxers off and pulling Jayma fully against his chest. Her eyes never left his, and her brows creased in thought. “What? What’s wrong?”

She smiled. “Nothing.” She lunged forward planting kisses all over his face, ending with his chin, remaining there a few seconds longer. Pulling away she looked into the deep hazel. “I just love you.”

He smiled and ran a hand through her hair, landing at the base of her neck and pulling her to him for a kiss. “I love you so much baby.”