Aug 08, 2010 21:48
Alright, here it is. I'm a perfectionist. I freak out when I don't get something just right. I'm going to come back to this post in two weeks, discover a grammatical error, and freak out. That's just who I am.
The problem is: I have two jobs, a baby, and I want to get something on its way to published. So, where does that leave my perfectionism?
For a while I have been wrestling with the concept of good enough. I cannot be teacher/mom/employee/homemaker/wife/friend of the year. There are not enough hours in the day. The house is never going to be perfect. I will always be a little behind on grading. I will have to sneak grading in during my day job. These are just facts of the world of 'good enough'. I'm not talking about slacking but survival.
Last January, when I started back at NVCC, I wasn't emotionally ready to go back to work, but I didn't really have a choice (fact of life when you are a teacher: your emotional needs run second to the semester). I tried to be everything at Dulin and NVCC and I was miserable. I ate like crap, didn't exercises and showed no attention to my marriage whatsoever. I can't do it this semester. So, today I started to practice 'good enough'.
Here goes:
By 6pm Dorian had drooled/pooped/spilled his way down to just a diaper and I didn't redress him, but I got to watch Shadow of a Doubt.
The counter is a mess but I gave myself a pedicure
The bed isn't made because Dorian and I took an epic three hour nap in it this afternoon.
So, my house is a bit messy and my son spent a good two hours looking like white trash, but I feel rested and ready to go to work this week and to finish up my syllabus for the Fall. I'm about to work a little on the paper I want to publish and then I'm going do yoga and settle into bed (with a parenting book).
Some stuff didn't get done, but no one is going to remember me for my housekeeping skills. What Gavin, Dorian, and I all need is a happy and balanced mommy and wife. All the better if she has happy feat.
Here's to good enough.
Oh, and Romulus turned 7. He's middle aged!