The Invention and use of "Randoms"
A. That’s difficult to explain. In fact, the best explanation is not to have one; but just to give you a vaguely undescriptive definition… Randoms are metaphorical and nonsensical, yet occasionally profound verbal nothingness intended purely for absurd-ism and self amusement.
They're something a friend and I invented, not that we invented saying random, weird things, but in context.
Similar to Jack Handey’s “Deep Thoughts” on SNL which largely appeared on the show from 1991 - 1998.
Q. Why should the world care about such a thing?
A. Because the world is often best viewed though humor and experienced with reckless abandon. I’m not saying that you need to go rocket roller skate yourself off an iceberg or anything, but think how much fun it’ll be (for you) the next time you’re standing by the water cooler or are a part of a conversation with nothing to add when you suddenly blurt out:
“Sometimes on my birthday I like to go out for Chinese food, then dislocate my fingers and try to use the chopsticks”.
Life is lived in these brief but often occurring moments. The next time one happens to you, don’t just stand around with nothing to add; interject a Random and see what happens. Sometimes they make sense, other times they are completely meaningless, but what’s important is that those you say them to… they all think there’s something meaningful behind what you just said, but instead of explaining yourself, you just nod and walk away. They’ll go back and try to work wondering what just happened, they’ll sit and ponder and try to make sense of it while you finish your day off with a smile on your face. As I said…. “self amusement”.
I’m so sick and tired of everyone always talking about the big picture. Ever notice that all of these same people are missing the point? They don’t get it. They don’t stop and smell the roses or more to the point they haven’t figured out that it’s all the little things that create the big picture in the first place.
So that’s all this is. It’s one of those little things. Some insignificant quip to help break up the monotony of your day.
My intention is to put out a day by day calendar of Randoms, perhaps a book someday depending on how things go.
Over the years, I’ve happily received many thousands of great compliments. (a lot of which were on Open Diary years ago). I’d like to take this time to personally thank all of those who have supported me since its inception. If I can make someone else smile, then I’ve had a good day. Hopefully such interest continues. Here’s what a few people have to say…
I am fascinated by your logic!
I really like the way you write. Every time I come and read I feel better about life. :P
WHAT!!!!!? hahaha, this was kind of funny. even though I’m afraid it could have a deeper meaning, you’re so ambiguous.
That’s amazing! I’m starting to understand everything you write! before it was like.. that’s really cool, but now its like… I agree completely!! You rock!
I would really enjoy an evening in your brain.
You’re like the evil Dr. Seuss!!! And I mean that in the greatest possible way!
Sometimes reading you is like watching a dark, gritty movie that doesn’t make sense unless you haven’t slept in a few days. I love it!
SAMPLES:
Cheaters never win! Except of course when they cheat, then they win all the time.
A girlfriend once said I was acute, but she wasn’t very good at math.
Zombies make the world go round… because all of the living that are left are running from them on a big giant circle!
I march to the beat of my own drum; except I never march, nor do I play drums.
Pessimism is just the acknowledgement and acceptance that there’s no escaping Murphy and his gang of laws.
If a carnivore eats a vegetarian… what exactly is going on there? Is that the carnivores way of cutting back on meat?
I once had a threesome with an m&m & a skittle, but in the throes of passion I couldn’t tell them apart. They both started yelling, I mean completely going off the deep end… then they stormed out together and left me handcuffed to the goat.
Copyright 1999 - 2016 - Jaye Eryk (aka: Jay Bird)
They're something a friend and I invented, not that we invented saying random, weird things, but in context.
Similar to Jack Handey’s “Deep Thoughts” on SNL which largely appeared on the show from 1991 - 1998.
Q. Why should the world care about such a thing?
A. Because the world is often best viewed though humor and experienced with reckless abandon. I’m not saying that you need to go rocket roller skate yourself off an iceberg or anything, but think how much fun it’ll be (for you) the next time you’re standing by the water cooler or are a part of a conversation with nothing to add when you suddenly blurt out:
“Sometimes on my birthday I like to go out for Chinese food, then dislocate my fingers and try to use the chopsticks”.
Life is lived in these brief but often occurring moments. The next time one happens to you, don’t just stand around with nothing to add; interject a Random and see what happens. Sometimes they make sense, other times they are completely meaningless, but what’s important is that those you say them to… they all think there’s something meaningful behind what you just said, but instead of explaining yourself, you just nod and walk away. They’ll go back and try to work wondering what just happened, they’ll sit and ponder and try to make sense of it while you finish your day off with a smile on your face. As I said…. “self amusement”.
I’m so sick and tired of everyone always talking about the big picture. Ever notice that all of these same people are missing the point? They don’t get it. They don’t stop and smell the roses or more to the point they haven’t figured out that it’s all the little things that create the big picture in the first place.
So that’s all this is. It’s one of those little things. Some insignificant quip to help break up the monotony of your day.
My intention is to put out a day by day calendar of Randoms, perhaps a book someday depending on how things go.
Over the years, I’ve happily received many thousands of great compliments. (a lot of which were on Open Diary years ago). I’d like to take this time to personally thank all of those who have supported me since its inception. If I can make someone else smile, then I’ve had a good day. Hopefully such interest continues. Here’s what a few people have to say…
I am fascinated by your logic!
I really like the way you write. Every time I come and read I feel better about life. :P
WHAT!!!!!? hahaha, this was kind of funny. even though I’m afraid it could have a deeper meaning, you’re so ambiguous.
That’s amazing! I’m starting to understand everything you write! before it was like.. that’s really cool, but now its like… I agree completely!! You rock!
I would really enjoy an evening in your brain.
You’re like the evil Dr. Seuss!!! And I mean that in the greatest possible way!
Sometimes reading you is like watching a dark, gritty movie that doesn’t make sense unless you haven’t slept in a few days. I love it!
SAMPLES:
Cheaters never win! Except of course when they cheat, then they win all the time.
A girlfriend once said I was acute, but she wasn’t very good at math.
Zombies make the world go round… because all of the living that are left are running from them on a big giant circle!
I march to the beat of my own drum; except I never march, nor do I play drums.
Pessimism is just the acknowledgement and acceptance that there’s no escaping Murphy and his gang of laws.
If a carnivore eats a vegetarian… what exactly is going on there? Is that the carnivores way of cutting back on meat?
I once had a threesome with an m&m & a skittle, but in the throes of passion I couldn’t tell them apart. They both started yelling, I mean completely going off the deep end… then they stormed out together and left me handcuffed to the goat.
Copyright 1999 - 2016 - Jaye Eryk (aka: Jay Bird)