10 Meme

[jay00789]

This meme is pretty simple. You have your categories and blank spots numbered 1-10 in each category. Fill those ten spots with The Brutal Truth. Be honest. Be vulnerable. Be introspective. Be deep. Don't just write anything down. Think about it and be honest with yourself.

Thanks
burningeden

for the Meme!


What I hate most about my appearance is:

1. My height. I’m 5’4-5’5 but I really want to be at least 5’7.
2. My hair. It’s too thick. Way too thick and is hard to manage. I hate it.
3. My thighs. They’re not huge, but they’re bigger than they need to be.
4. My torso. It’s small. It’s boobs, 1 ½ inches, then belly button.
5. My skin is allergic to the most random shit that no one else is. Which more than often doesn’t even react like other people when they have a reaction.
6. My skin under my eyes is a slightly darker shade than the rest of my face and it makes me feel like I give the appearance of a druggie.
7. I sweat way more than any woman ever should and I hate it. Never any smell, just wet arms. Damnations I hate that.
8. My throat. Because at certain angles, or when I’m singing in choir, I appear to have an Adam’s apple. Not cool. The end.
9. Acne. Not huge spouts of it that cover my face just the occasional one that says hey, I’m here to piss you off.
10. My boobs, too big for me. One size down would be nice.

What I like most about my appearance is:

1. My arms. They’re not quite the awesome hotness that is Michelle Obama’s but they’re okay.
2. My smile. I don’t have dimples, but my smile literally takes up my whole face.
3. My eyes. They’re big and you can tell exactly how I’m feeling just by looking in them.
4. My hands. I’m not sure why. I just really like my hands.
5. My shoulders. They used to be manly huge, because I lifted weights for sports but now they’re just really nice and ladylike. Lol
6. My abs. I work hard on them to get to look the way they do. They’re probably what I like the most about my body physically.
7. My legs in general. Since my torso is very short, I’m mostly just legs.
8. My ears. I can wiggle them lol
9. My voice. It’s low but not manly Miley Cirus low.
10. The actual color of my skin. I’m not mixed, I’m just light skinned from my genes (two grandparents were biracial) and I don’t tan all that easily. So I keep the same “shade” year round.

What I would change about myself instantly:

1. I’m waaaaaayyyy too insecure. I let what one person said in the past say about me stick in my head and I can’t get that bitch out. Because of this feeling, I just lost a relationship that was amazing. So yeah fuck the insecurity inside of my head.
2. I worry more than any teenager ever should. I mean worry similar to that of a mom who puts her kid in that plastic bubble because she’s afraid the air particles will injure little Timmy.
3. I second guess myself on everything. That needs to go pronto.
4. I wouldn’t be so shy. First two weeks of high school? I spoke to two people and that’s only because I already knew them.
5. I’d have more of a backbone. I tend to let people decide options for me even if it’s not what I want just because I’m afraid of confrontation.
6. I’d be more open to my family and have more trust in them.
7. I’d be organized. I’m on of those people that finds organization in a mess.
8. I’d change my attitude about school. It’s not the end of the world if I don’t pass a test, but it certainly doesn’t help the world if I get one.
9. I wouldn’t obsess over things that aren’t all that important.
10. Count my blessings everyday instead of only when something tragic happens in my life.

What I would never change about myself:

1. My laugh. It’s a full body laugh. I put my all into. I don’t do that southern bell polite laugh. I feel my laugh from my head to my toes.
2. The way I am with children. I have yet to meet a child that doesn’t like me at some point.
3. (Speaking of children) My inner child. There’s WAY too much shit in this world going on that tries to beat down a person. Keeping that child in me reminds me of the joy in the world.
4. The way I’m passionate about almost everything I do.
5. The artist inside of me. It allows me to see things in ways that most people can’t or don’t.
6. My love of knowing everything in history. I think about anything and everything. If I feel as though I don’t know enough about it, I’ll look it up until I know everything about it.
7. My love of books. I have over 300 books now in my library alone. Books are what make my world.
8. My sense of humor. I like to make people laugh what can I say?
9. I’m humble. I know what kind of person admits they’re humble? But I am. If you want to acknowledge me for something I’ve done well, go for it. But I could really care less. I’m not in it for the glory or praise.
10. My mind is like an elephants. I rarely forget things in the long run. Sure I might forget something in the present, but I can remember things from when I was six years old perfectly.

What do I regret the most in life?

1. Amy. That’s all I’m going to say on that one.
2. Not voicing my problems to my mother in high school/middle school. We’d probably have a better relationship if I had.
3. Being cruel to my little sister because I was going through my own shit. She’s my favorite person in the world and I love her.
4. Not focusing on school like I should have senior year of High school.
5. Listening to #1 for so long and allowing her to make me feel insecure.
6. Not telling my mother I was gay in 7th grade when I had the perfect time.
7. Getting my hair cut junior year. It was long like Sara Ramirez long.
8. Whatever that first big lie was that I told my mother.
9. Not taking dance classes in middle school.
10. Not trusting my friends to help me through my dark depression moments sophomore year.

What are you most proud of in life?

1. The way I treat my sister now.
2. Coming out to my three best friends.
3. Getting that scholarship.
4. Passing Chemistry and Physical Science
5. Not gaining the freshman 15 lbs.
6. Walking across that stage in 2008 in that cap and gown!
7. Winning the gold award in an Oratorical Contest when I was three years younger than everyone in the competition.
8. Getting an A on my senior project about Racism.
9. Watching a kid whom I babysat and watched out for, thank me for still being his friend when he graduated valedictorian in 8th grade.
10. Teaching a little boy, with a learning disability his alphabet. If he didn’t learn them he was going to have to stay back another year.

What do you hate most about the world?

1. Parents who raise their children to be racists. Like those fucktards in Germany who taught their two girls to play guitar and sing just so they could sing racist songs. The fuckers sent a care package to New Orleans after Katrina but only wanted it to go to white people only. Bastards.
2. Homophobia. It’s my life not yours so stay the fuck out of it. If you think my marriage is going to in any screw up yours, well then you deary have quite the shitty marriage.
3. Poverty. How the hell do we have phones that cost $400 dollars and have children at the age of seven going through landfills looking for dinner?! That’s bullshit.
4. People who don’t support AIDS research/education. There are men in Africa infected with AIDS going around and raping young girls because they believe that having sex with a virgin will cure you of the disease. Yeah there’s nothing wrong with that picture at all *eyeroll*.
5. Cruelty to animals. I may not like animals all that much, I may eat meat, and I may even yell at my neighbor’s four dogs from time to time. But I would never just abuse an animal. That’s just sick. Dog fighting, Cock fighting, Bull fighting. Fuck them all.
6. Child Molesters. Fuck them. That’s all I can say. You are a sick fuck if you think children are a turn on. Just get the fuck away from me or I might just kill you on spot seriously.
7. How little people care about this earth.
8. How little people care about one another.
9. DESCRIMINARION. It’s pointless, we know this, but we still discriminate against people and places based on past events.
10. How parents are allowing the world to raise their children instead of them. I’m just going to leave it at that. This one would cause me to rant for paragraphs.

What do you love the most about the world?

1. Children.
2. The way love still exists in the most obscure places.
3. The way hope can change everything in a situation.
4. Laughter.
5. Trees.
6. Oceans.
7. Love in general.
8. Art.
9. Music.
10. People coming together world wide for a cause.

People would be shocked to know that I'm interested in:

1. Chess
2. Carpentry.
3. Designing my own furniture.
4. Environmental studies
5. History ( I could watch the history channel and PBS all day long)
6. Shakespeare
7. Architecture
8. Speaking in front of big crowds.
9. Web Design
10. Never living in the south again unless I'm in Savanah, GA.

People would be shocked to know that I am NOT interested in:

1. Opening up my own daycare.
2. Teaching children.
3. Physically having a child. Um, no very low pain tolerance.
4. Becoming a lawyer.
5. Majoring in Women’s studies (I’d love the class though for sure!)
6. The TV shows Scrubs and Lost. I hate them. Seriously.
7. Painting.
8. Physically going to church. My faith goes beyond four walls.
9. (Speaking of faith) The Movie Passion of the Christ.
10. Becoming a vegetarian.
    
    

The following things make me miserable:

1. Allergies. I’m allergic to everything. Trees, pollen, cut grass, dogs, cats, Nair (yes that hair removal shit. Don’t. Ask.), and I have asthma.
2. The ending of Guiding Light.
3. Any time Sara Ramirez is not on my screen during Grey’s Anatomy.
4. Running out of granola bars.
5. Blazing heat in July. Jesus that needs to end ASAP.
6. My worsening eyesight.
7. Three letters. PMS. I have to take medication to prevent my body from throwing up every hour. It rarely works though.
8. Science and Math classes. Die.
9. My friends from high school going away to college.
10. Insecure thoughts that sporadically pop into my head at happy moments.

The following things make me insanely giddy:

1. Children and what they say. Example: “Ms. Jordan is there gravity in here?” (We’ve been in a cave underground for two hours) “Um… yeah Ethan there’s gravity.” *Nods his little head* “Good. I like gravity.”
2. Inside jokes between my sister and me. Good times.
3. My mother/father attempting to guess who that is singing on the radio. To them every one is Jennifer Hudson or Keith Urban.
4. The Otalia outtake video with all that giggling. “You are ON the Advocate dot com.” “Yeah that’s where you at sooo.”
5. Crystal Chappell’s tweets on Twitter.
6. Listening to a 3 yr old explain to you how the world works.
7. Sara Ramirez.
8. Will and Grace/ Friends reruns.
9. Family Guy
10. Talking to my gay friend Lee about dancing to the music at Gap.

My favorite movies are:

1. Beauty and The Beast. I still have a crush on Belle.
2. The Lion King
3. The Untouchables
4. Mean Girls. Rachel McAdams and Tina Fey what more do you need?
5. RENT
6. The Goofy Movie
7. Red Eye. Rachel McAdams kicks ASS in this movie.
8. The Prince of Egypt. I’m listening to the soundtrack right now.
9. Diary of A Mad Black Woman
10. Hitch

I wouldn't be caught dead watching the following movies for a second time:

1. War of The Worlds Tom Cruise version
2. Jumper
3. G.I. Joe. What a disappointment that movie was.
4. High School Musical
5. Hannah Montana. I was babysitting. Damn child had the movie memorized.
6. Wanted. Angelina was hot for sure, but she couldn’t save this movie sorry.
7. Confessions of A Teenage Drama Queen. No. Just…no.
8. Norbit.
9. That Willy Wonka with Jonny Depp. It was creepy. Waaaay too creepy.
10. From Justin to Kelly. Just a complete fail in every way.

I hold these truths about myself to be self evident and brutally candid:

1. I have little to no self esteem 75% of the time.
2. I make excuses a lot of the time to avoid the truth.
3. I let people walk all over me.
4. I don't know if I'll stick to politics.
5. I'm not focused enough on my future.
6. My mom really does know a lot about life and I should listen to her.
7. I lie to myself too much.
8. I tend to fuck over my own life more than the people or reasons I blame.
9. I depend on others to help me too much.
10. I  do have trust issues with almost everyone I meet.