Two spirit people commentary
Okay....I've been doing a lil research on my own to understand myself better. Mostly because on a personal level I've started getting confused about myself. Somedays I want no more than to find a dr. to get me on the right hormones and get on with everything; totally make the full change. Then there's other days were it seems like my mind starts doing things just to fuck with me. I start feeling like, why do I want to change that badly? Yeah, it's right cause I'm more male than female, but what's wrong with being both....then I get a headache cause my brain starts spinning and won't stop.
So, I set out to see if this was going on with others like me. Heh....found out I'm woefully uneducated in a section of a culture that I tend to highly revere. I was directed to the Berdache. Two Spirit people to be exact. Although whether or not they were more like me, or more along the lines of gay/lesbian is still not and probably never will be too clear (probably cause it didn't matter to the culture, they were simply two spirits, period end of story). I read several articles trying to explain two spirits and such and came across one that explained it the best so far. (It's on a christian doctrine site strangely enough, but it's a good site that trys to understand other cultures and beliefs and doesn't downplay there validity too much.)
http://www.whosoever.org/v3i3/berdaches.html
Like I said it's good. And it explained better to me the reason I sometimes get confused about what I want to do to feel right. It comes down to the male/female necessity and how sometimes you get to come back with both parts of your soul in one body. Either totally where it's physical as well as mental or sometimes just one or the other. Either way, it explains my confusion. Evidently I'm more fused than I thought. But I still think that for certain I will be happier with some hormone help. As for the rest, at this point I've just got to wait and see.
I do think I'm gonna take this further in another thread, more religious in nature though...guess it's stuff I've had on my mind for awhile and it's all starting to come into focus finally.
So, I set out to see if this was going on with others like me. Heh....found out I'm woefully uneducated in a section of a culture that I tend to highly revere. I was directed to the Berdache. Two Spirit people to be exact. Although whether or not they were more like me, or more along the lines of gay/lesbian is still not and probably never will be too clear (probably cause it didn't matter to the culture, they were simply two spirits, period end of story). I read several articles trying to explain two spirits and such and came across one that explained it the best so far. (It's on a christian doctrine site strangely enough, but it's a good site that trys to understand other cultures and beliefs and doesn't downplay there validity too much.)
http://www.whosoever.org/v3i3/berdaches.html
Like I said it's good. And it explained better to me the reason I sometimes get confused about what I want to do to feel right. It comes down to the male/female necessity and how sometimes you get to come back with both parts of your soul in one body. Either totally where it's physical as well as mental or sometimes just one or the other. Either way, it explains my confusion. Evidently I'm more fused than I thought. But I still think that for certain I will be happier with some hormone help. As for the rest, at this point I've just got to wait and see.
I do think I'm gonna take this further in another thread, more religious in nature though...guess it's stuff I've had on my mind for awhile and it's all starting to come into focus finally.