Fragile
Title: Fragile
Author: jaune_chat
Fandom: Heroes
Characters/Pairing: Nathan/Heidi
Rating: Hard R to NC-17 for descriptions of sex
Word Count: 1,155
Spoilers: Vague early S3
Warnings: Het, angst
Disclaimer: Heroes is owned by Tim Kring, NBC, et al.
Notes: Written for the Heroes Kink Meme Rides Again for the prompt: “Heidi/Nathan with Heidi discovering she has a power.” This has been edited and expanded from the original kink meme version.
Summary: Heidi wanted to prove she could be touched without being moved.
The papers had been finalized last week. It was official, Heidi Petrelli was no longer a married woman. She’d considered changing her name back to Carmichael, just to make the break as clean as possible, but had decided to wait. For the sake of Simon and Monty, she’d keep things civil, a veneer of respect between husband and wife that no longer existed.
Respect had always been the strongest thing between them. Before affection or love or children had been respect. Heidi had respected Nathan’s ambition, his intelligence, his drive for perfection and power. He’d respected her competence, her skills, her tolerance and knowledge of how the world worked. Maybe they’d begun courting out of a mutual physical attraction (God knew Nathan turned heads wherever he went, family fortune or no, and Heidi hadn’t been immune to his charm), but the real dealmaker was their families.
The Carmichaels had deeper political connections, and the Petrellis had both a respectable law practice and friends in all the right places. Together, they could aim higher. Heidi and Nathan had both respected that goal. And maybe they’d started with hormones and ambition, but there’d been respect under that. After, they’d found real affection, even love.
There’d been laughter at the summerhouse, watching their children play in the sand, romantic weekends in between his hearings and her charity work. They’d been good together. They’d been untouchable, perfect, her overlooking any excesses of his, him not demanding any more than she could give. Then had come the accident. And everything had begun to crumble. Heidi’s power had begun to wane; she’d kept Nathan faithful through every trick she knew, but now that she couldn’t feel, couldn’t move, she could only use words. That wasn’t enough, and she wasn’t going to bend her broken back to give him satisfaction through her own loss.
He’d strayed, he’d gone off the rails entirely, spiraling nearly out of control, so that when the miracle had happened, when she’d found herself able to move again, it was too late. At the time, she’d thought it was almost too late, until he’d gotten so badly hurt when Peter vanished. When he’d crawled into despondency, drunkenness and despair, and after he’d somehow managed to make a miraculous recovery without a hint of the surgery that should have been needed, perhaps he would have needed her again, them again. But no, it had been too late for them both when the car had hit the dividing wall.
They’d lost that love, the affection, and finally the respect. And now, in the face of freedom, Heidi wanted that respect back. She wanted to know that he still wanted her, found her desirable.
She just wanted him to touch her, to know he wanted her without feeling touched. The papers had been signed. Nathan had recovered from that hideous shooting. Heidi was a single mother now, available and free. Nathan no longer had any rights to her but what she allowed him. And she’d decided to allow him to see she no longer needed him.
Undoubtedly her therapist would be very cross; sleeping with her ex-husband was probably on the top of the list of things she shouldn’t be doing.
And for good reason. He was beautiful, persuasive, and they’d had twenty years together to learn each other. Nathan knew that to kiss the side of her neck, to suck gently where it joined her shoulder, made her feel like melting into his arms. He knew exactly how to undress her one-handed, where her ticklish spots were, just what to whisper in her ear.
“I missed you. I know I never said where I was, or what I was doing, but I thought about you and the boys all the time… I love you Heidi. I always will.”
She could feel herself crying even as her hands moved, nails running over familiar patterns, knowing what used to make him gasp and writhe against her, what he would beg for. Her legs around him tight, open and aching, wanting him so badly and knowing he wanted her too… Heidi bit back a cry when he entered her, willing and eager, but not desperate. He was touching her, in her, and she was being touched, moved, feeling more than she had meant to.
He was harder now, tougher, wrapped up in something she was no longer a part of. She was no longer the faithful wife, an intrinsic part of his image and campaign. Nathan was beyond her reach, wanting her, but not enough. Not enough to return. Not enough to show weakness for her. He’d make love to her, but he wasn’t loving her.
She hadn’t wanted to feel him touching her but not caring enough. She wasn’t Meredith, to be discarded at a whim. Not her, not his wife. Her cries were coming harder now, body moving even if her heart was cracking. She felt delicate, like she might break apart from the inside out. If only he could see what damage he’d wrought inside, beyond the toughness she’d shown him in inviting him here…
Nathan’s hands glided over Heidi’s skin, suddenly smooth and glossy, clear as her pale eyes. She opened her eyes to look at him, watching the wonder and fear on his face as she turned into living glass beneath him.
“Be careful with me,” she whispered, voice singing like crystal as he finally seemed to see right through everything she’d been hiding. “I’m fragile.”
It never occurred to her to be afraid of what was happening to her, not when she could suddenly see a glimmer of their old respect and love on his face.
“Heidi,” he said softly, and cradled her in his arms. “God, Heidi, I never knew…”
He was holding on to her firmly, and she could no longer feel the bed at her back. Weightless and flying in his arms, she pressed cool lips to the side of his neck and stroked a smooth hand through his hair.
“I wanted, I wanted-,” he started, and she could feel him begin to tremble against her, starting to lose control. “I wanted to save us.”
Us. Flight. Living glass. Who knew what else? It was Nathan’s new project, his new obsession, his new love.
“Then save them,” she said. “Then maybe you can save us.”
Us. Heidi and Nathan.
Nathan cried out as he released, his voice soft and low, resonating through her in crystal pulses. Heidi kept her eyes on him, seeing him being moved, feeling, seeing something she hadn’t seen for over a year. Love. Respect. Distant and buried, but it was still there, somewhere.
She didn’t speak, only held him, knowing he was going to leave her again. And this time he wouldn’t be back until he’d found a way to save them. All of them. Both of them. She wouldn’t push him yet. It was still too fragile between them.
Author: jaune_chat
Fandom: Heroes
Characters/Pairing: Nathan/Heidi
Rating: Hard R to NC-17 for descriptions of sex
Word Count: 1,155
Spoilers: Vague early S3
Warnings: Het, angst
Disclaimer: Heroes is owned by Tim Kring, NBC, et al.
Notes: Written for the Heroes Kink Meme Rides Again for the prompt: “Heidi/Nathan with Heidi discovering she has a power.” This has been edited and expanded from the original kink meme version.
Summary: Heidi wanted to prove she could be touched without being moved.
The papers had been finalized last week. It was official, Heidi Petrelli was no longer a married woman. She’d considered changing her name back to Carmichael, just to make the break as clean as possible, but had decided to wait. For the sake of Simon and Monty, she’d keep things civil, a veneer of respect between husband and wife that no longer existed.
Respect had always been the strongest thing between them. Before affection or love or children had been respect. Heidi had respected Nathan’s ambition, his intelligence, his drive for perfection and power. He’d respected her competence, her skills, her tolerance and knowledge of how the world worked. Maybe they’d begun courting out of a mutual physical attraction (God knew Nathan turned heads wherever he went, family fortune or no, and Heidi hadn’t been immune to his charm), but the real dealmaker was their families.
The Carmichaels had deeper political connections, and the Petrellis had both a respectable law practice and friends in all the right places. Together, they could aim higher. Heidi and Nathan had both respected that goal. And maybe they’d started with hormones and ambition, but there’d been respect under that. After, they’d found real affection, even love.
There’d been laughter at the summerhouse, watching their children play in the sand, romantic weekends in between his hearings and her charity work. They’d been good together. They’d been untouchable, perfect, her overlooking any excesses of his, him not demanding any more than she could give. Then had come the accident. And everything had begun to crumble. Heidi’s power had begun to wane; she’d kept Nathan faithful through every trick she knew, but now that she couldn’t feel, couldn’t move, she could only use words. That wasn’t enough, and she wasn’t going to bend her broken back to give him satisfaction through her own loss.
He’d strayed, he’d gone off the rails entirely, spiraling nearly out of control, so that when the miracle had happened, when she’d found herself able to move again, it was too late. At the time, she’d thought it was almost too late, until he’d gotten so badly hurt when Peter vanished. When he’d crawled into despondency, drunkenness and despair, and after he’d somehow managed to make a miraculous recovery without a hint of the surgery that should have been needed, perhaps he would have needed her again, them again. But no, it had been too late for them both when the car had hit the dividing wall.
They’d lost that love, the affection, and finally the respect. And now, in the face of freedom, Heidi wanted that respect back. She wanted to know that he still wanted her, found her desirable.
She just wanted him to touch her, to know he wanted her without feeling touched. The papers had been signed. Nathan had recovered from that hideous shooting. Heidi was a single mother now, available and free. Nathan no longer had any rights to her but what she allowed him. And she’d decided to allow him to see she no longer needed him.
Undoubtedly her therapist would be very cross; sleeping with her ex-husband was probably on the top of the list of things she shouldn’t be doing.
And for good reason. He was beautiful, persuasive, and they’d had twenty years together to learn each other. Nathan knew that to kiss the side of her neck, to suck gently where it joined her shoulder, made her feel like melting into his arms. He knew exactly how to undress her one-handed, where her ticklish spots were, just what to whisper in her ear.
“I missed you. I know I never said where I was, or what I was doing, but I thought about you and the boys all the time… I love you Heidi. I always will.”
She could feel herself crying even as her hands moved, nails running over familiar patterns, knowing what used to make him gasp and writhe against her, what he would beg for. Her legs around him tight, open and aching, wanting him so badly and knowing he wanted her too… Heidi bit back a cry when he entered her, willing and eager, but not desperate. He was touching her, in her, and she was being touched, moved, feeling more than she had meant to.
He was harder now, tougher, wrapped up in something she was no longer a part of. She was no longer the faithful wife, an intrinsic part of his image and campaign. Nathan was beyond her reach, wanting her, but not enough. Not enough to return. Not enough to show weakness for her. He’d make love to her, but he wasn’t loving her.
She hadn’t wanted to feel him touching her but not caring enough. She wasn’t Meredith, to be discarded at a whim. Not her, not his wife. Her cries were coming harder now, body moving even if her heart was cracking. She felt delicate, like she might break apart from the inside out. If only he could see what damage he’d wrought inside, beyond the toughness she’d shown him in inviting him here…
Nathan’s hands glided over Heidi’s skin, suddenly smooth and glossy, clear as her pale eyes. She opened her eyes to look at him, watching the wonder and fear on his face as she turned into living glass beneath him.
“Be careful with me,” she whispered, voice singing like crystal as he finally seemed to see right through everything she’d been hiding. “I’m fragile.”
It never occurred to her to be afraid of what was happening to her, not when she could suddenly see a glimmer of their old respect and love on his face.
“Heidi,” he said softly, and cradled her in his arms. “God, Heidi, I never knew…”
He was holding on to her firmly, and she could no longer feel the bed at her back. Weightless and flying in his arms, she pressed cool lips to the side of his neck and stroked a smooth hand through his hair.
“I wanted, I wanted-,” he started, and she could feel him begin to tremble against her, starting to lose control. “I wanted to save us.”
Us. Flight. Living glass. Who knew what else? It was Nathan’s new project, his new obsession, his new love.
“Then save them,” she said. “Then maybe you can save us.”
Us. Heidi and Nathan.
Nathan cried out as he released, his voice soft and low, resonating through her in crystal pulses. Heidi kept her eyes on him, seeing him being moved, feeling, seeing something she hadn’t seen for over a year. Love. Respect. Distant and buried, but it was still there, somewhere.
She didn’t speak, only held him, knowing he was going to leave her again. And this time he wouldn’t be back until he’d found a way to save them. All of them. Both of them. She wouldn’t push him yet. It was still too fragile between them.