'Maybe'
Title: Maybe
Characters/Pairings: Peter and Nathan
Rating: G
Warnings:. None.
Spoiler alert: If you watch the show, You’re safe
Summary: Peter watched on silently wishing it was still ok to cry…
Woot! First in my 50 stories challenge!
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He was so confused when the only stable thing in his life up and left him, and it broke his little eight year old heart to say goodbye. Despite countless conversations in which the words ‘be prepared’ were uttered innumerous times, he just couldn’t understand it. It hadn’t seemed real until the moment his whole world walked out the door with a suitcase in hand and a smile on his face while Peter watched on silently wishing it was still ok to cry. He knew what his dad would say if he cried, and even though he wanted to so badly he knew the argument that came later wouldn’t be worth it. Standing straight with his arms folded across his chest the only sign of the hurt he was feeling was in his eyes, and he sent out a silent call to Nathan to look at him and reconsider.
But he didn’t.
The day his brother left for college was the day his childhood ended, and although he knew without being told that he’d had a much longer run of it than his brother, it didn’t make it any easier to endure the long grueling looks and the snapped orders in the weeks and months that followed. It was as though his shield had been taken away, and for the first time Peter was truly scared. He had no where to run when the nightmares got bad, no one to tell him it wasn’t a big deal that he still wet the bed sometimes and no one to take care of him when there was a party or conference his parents just couldn’t miss. For the first time, he was completely alone, and he hated how weak it made him feel. He hated Nathan for babying him for so long, but that was only when his father looked at him as though he wished they had stopped at one. Peter understood, even as a child, that if he wanted someone to look up to, someone to believe in him, then he had to look somewhere else because the man who was his father clearly didn’t feel any paternal need to care for a messy eight year old with a runny nose and dirt on his pants.
So Peter had looked to Nathan.
Maybe that was why he had been so upset when Nathan hadn’t believed him. Maybe it was because he still felt like that eight year old boy watching through his bedroom window for any sign that his Big Brother, his hero, had returned.
Maybe it was because he wished that for once he could be the strong one, the hero.
Maybe then it wouldn’t hurt so much when he got left behind.
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Characters/Pairings: Peter and Nathan
Rating: G
Warnings:. None.
Spoiler alert: If you watch the show, You’re safe
Summary: Peter watched on silently wishing it was still ok to cry…
Woot! First in my 50 stories challenge!
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
He was so confused when the only stable thing in his life up and left him, and it broke his little eight year old heart to say goodbye. Despite countless conversations in which the words ‘be prepared’ were uttered innumerous times, he just couldn’t understand it. It hadn’t seemed real until the moment his whole world walked out the door with a suitcase in hand and a smile on his face while Peter watched on silently wishing it was still ok to cry. He knew what his dad would say if he cried, and even though he wanted to so badly he knew the argument that came later wouldn’t be worth it. Standing straight with his arms folded across his chest the only sign of the hurt he was feeling was in his eyes, and he sent out a silent call to Nathan to look at him and reconsider.
But he didn’t.
The day his brother left for college was the day his childhood ended, and although he knew without being told that he’d had a much longer run of it than his brother, it didn’t make it any easier to endure the long grueling looks and the snapped orders in the weeks and months that followed. It was as though his shield had been taken away, and for the first time Peter was truly scared. He had no where to run when the nightmares got bad, no one to tell him it wasn’t a big deal that he still wet the bed sometimes and no one to take care of him when there was a party or conference his parents just couldn’t miss. For the first time, he was completely alone, and he hated how weak it made him feel. He hated Nathan for babying him for so long, but that was only when his father looked at him as though he wished they had stopped at one. Peter understood, even as a child, that if he wanted someone to look up to, someone to believe in him, then he had to look somewhere else because the man who was his father clearly didn’t feel any paternal need to care for a messy eight year old with a runny nose and dirt on his pants.
So Peter had looked to Nathan.
Maybe that was why he had been so upset when Nathan hadn’t believed him. Maybe it was because he still felt like that eight year old boy watching through his bedroom window for any sign that his Big Brother, his hero, had returned.
Maybe it was because he wished that for once he could be the strong one, the hero.
Maybe then it wouldn’t hurt so much when he got left behind.
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