The Story of Anthrocon (2010) - Con report by Jaspian (part 3 (conclusion))
THE STORY OF ANTHROCON
My con report of Anthrocon 2010
SUNDAY
I got up earlier than I expected (definitely didn’t get my 8-hours worth, but I awakened feeling rested, so I don’t care much). My roommates and I then attempted to find food. Taridium wanted to go to a hibachi grill, as is his Sunday tradition, but I’m not a huge fan of hibachi - its overpriced and the food is mediocre, and I had already eaten overpriced mediocre Japanese food the previous day, so I told him that I would not go to hibachi with them if they went. I wasn’t being a prima donna about it either - I sort-of expected them to just go on without me, and I would have been fine with that... but when I mentioned that I wanted Texmex (my favorite ethnic food, or perhaps second favorite behind Middle-Eastern... its hard to say... they’re both pretty fantastic), suddenly the room abandoned Taridium’s tradition and sided with me.
Now the difficulty was to find a Texmex restaurant that was open on Sunday. As strange as this sounds, Pittsburgh businesses operate on very unusual hours. Virtually everything closes at 6, and those that don’t are usually closed soon after. On Sunday everything is closed. So we used the internet phones and looked them up, then we called a few places, they were all closed. I’m not particularly sure why we ended up choosing this one place. Someone must have suggested that it was open, because we walked there. I was -starving-. It was extremely hot and uncomfortable outside, and I was totally miserable, and even moreso when we got there and found that the place was closed.
After a short meeting, we decided to go on to Oh Houlihans, which I was assured would be open and would have nachos (yay Texmex!) It was nice inside. Quiet and cool. We didn’t get the best table. If it were busy, being so close to the door would have been an annoyance, but it was quiet and peaceful, so it was all good. The waiter was great, the food was orgasmic (even the iced tea was particularly good), and we had a lot of fun there. (The Italian Doughnuts were especially good... if you ever go there - get them!) While I was there, I got a text from Jewel that they would be having the vorephile dinner on Sunday right across the street from where I was eating, but by this time I was already pretty full. Oh well. :( Before long, we hiked back to the hotel.
When we got there, we ran into Kyo in the lobby and I recommended the place. With food in-belly, it was time to party, so I went back to the room and got cleaned up, got into the show-costume, and we went to the Hudson Furs party at the Omni. Initially I had some serious reservations about going so far for a party, but Taridium wanted me to go and see it (as if I’ve never seen their parties before?) because he’s somehow very impressed by their parties. I was reluctant to go, and had skipped them throughout the con for a couple reasons... one is, I didn’t want to be walking around in downtown Pittsburgh in my show costume. The other is, in previous years, I was not that impressed with the party.
Once again, the Hudson Furs party was nothing special. It was wicked hot in the room, despite my almost complete lack of clothing and the air conditioning pumped up to the highest setting. This is a fault with the Omni hotel, and the reason why I refuse to stay there. The building is old. Its not built for proper air flow with air conditioning. Any more than a couple people makes it totally stifling. I was a little bored there, but there were some interesting people. It was good to talk to Kitt again, and Red. Here is where I learned about the travesty that Kage committed against an innocent fur - and I suspect this isn’t the first time.
The roommate of the fur who supposedly threatened to commit suicide by jumping off of the convention center was there, and supposedly he was present when the Dorsai heroically saved him from himself (italics denote sarcasm). Apparently, said fur was leaning over the railing to take a picture of the city without the convention center in his frame. He was even holding on to the railing with his other hand and was in no danger of falling. Dorsai confiscated his badge and gave it to Kage. Mind you - this is even before the convention officially started - and Kage proceeded to blast the poor guy during opening ceremonies, even bringing his badge up on stage as a prop for jokes, making a public mockery of him just to get a few laughs. Essentially, he assassinated this fur’s image publicly in a forum where he’s unable to defend himself for chuckles. This is a new low, even for Anthrocon. Furthermore, they banned the poor fellow forever, and told him that he will only be re-admitted to the con if he pays out-of-pocket for the additional security that will have to be hired to patrol the Convention Center roof henceforth... a bill starting around the $2000 range. The sleeze of this man committed towards this fellow fur puts Anthrocon’s opinion of individual furs into perspective - they don’t care about any single one of us, and will throw nameless innocent furs into the woodchipper just to make the others laugh. Its time to stop laughing at Kage’s jokes. I doubt anyone will heed this, so I don’t know what good it will do, but I urge you all to boycott Kage’s events, if not Anthrocon altogether. Do not go to Story Hour, or Opening or Closing ceremonies. There’s nothing discussed in the ceremonies that you can’t find out from someone else secondhand, and... I know it isn’t likely, but... if we can get Kage speaking to an empty theater, that will spank him so hard that he’ll realize that he’s finally abused the fandom too far. Speaking of which! Did you know that Kage set up a donation bin to get 2 the Ranting Griffin to Eurofurence for free because (awww) he couldn’t afford to go? Did you also know that he set up a donation to redo his kitchen, and furs actually donated? Do you also know that Kage makes hundreds of thousands of dollars per year as a medical researcher, and still takes a salary from Anthrocon? Did you know that a portion of your donations to the Anthrocon charity, if done through AC and not through the charity itself, goes into Kage’s pocket? And yet, he still has to audacity to beg for donations? If you’ve given him your money, he’s playing you for a fool.
Anyway, so I got drunk on some of the leftover booze and then we went back to the Westin. Here I wandered around a bunch looking for another game of Werewolf, but pretty much everybody had already gone. The con was over, and those who hadn’t left already were in bed early to catch flights or drive or generally be out of the hotel by checkout time. I did run into Sasho and one of his friends - a fellow who wears a Lion head and a Spartan costume from the movie 300. Its a very sexy costume, since he’s in fantastic shape. We got to chatting a bit, and Sasho overheard me say that I could “take him” and decided to inform Mr Lion Bodybuilder Leonidas that I had said it. I’m a little pissed off that Sasho would do such a thing, since I was in no condition to be wrestling. I was drunk and in a show costume, but I did say it, and so I felt a bit obligated to comply. I took off what bits I could easily take off and got into position.
The stance he took made it seem like he knew what he was doing, but if I could have taken him down in one move. One of the advantages of Capoeira is that none of the traditional martial arts know how to deal with it, since it doesn’t share the same origin. Anyway - we fought, and it was a little silly. Since it was all for play, there was no striking, and Capoeira is all striking and takedowns. So here I am, fighting him, blocking halfhearted blows, while pulling my own kicks. The real tragedy is that it was impossible for either of us, who didn’t know eachother’s forms, to tell if they would have just “hit” us. In Capoeira, we pull our blows, but we know that we would have been hit if the kick or sweep had continued, and therefore we can figure out who the winner is, but because he didn’t know that I could have busted his head open on several occasions (he just ignored my hammer kicks, which is one of the most powerful kicks in Capoeira) I finally got frustrated and just took him down. This is considered the end of a Capoeria fight, since you can then easily dispatch your opponent with a knife once they’re on the ground under you in real combat. However, we never laid out the rules, and so he grabbed my wrist and pulled me down. Initially I was on top, but he’s a lot bigger than me, and while holding my wrist, he just rolled over. Capoeira has no grappling, so I yielded immediately.
It was still kinda fun, but I shouldn’t have done it in show costume, even with the delicate pieces taken off. Next time, I will keep my yapper shut.
After this, I invited folks back to the room to help me finish up some of the booze that I brought. While we were waiting for some of them to arrive, I tried to show Taridium the takedown I had used, but the corridor was too narrow and I hit my elbow on the wall. I hardly noticed this at the time, but the next day it really hurt. I also had a bruise on my back from the fight which I don’t remember getting. Anyway - there were people sleeping in the room, so we ended up not finishing my booze. Tari and I polished off the few sips that were left of the vodka and tequila (respectively) and then he went to bed and I took a shower, and then also went to bed.
MONDAY
I got up early, packed up, and was ready to go before anyone else. However, I had the most stuff, and so had to make multiple trips. On one trip, the bottom of the box with the feathers gave out, scattering them all over the parking garage. This makes me sad, considering how much those feathers cost! After packing up the cars, the Westin was quite dead. Tari and I went to Tonic to have lunch (I wanted to just go to Subway, but Tari wanted fancy food). It was pretty good.
We said our goodbyes, and then I got on the road to drive to Rochester and drop off the stuff that Soron had lent me for the trip. I stayed there for awhile, just socializing with them, and around dinnertime, we went to get the Texmex that I never got to have at Anthrocon (nachos!) I ended up leaving far later than I had wanted, and never got home until around 4 am.
CONCLUSION
Anthrocon 2010 was what I expected Anthrocon 2009 to be - moderately entertaining, but completely unexceptional. Very little happened of note. Looking back, its hard to even distinguish individual events. It was mostly just some kind of gray haze of mediocrity. This was partially my own fault. I think AC 2009 was so good because I didn’t clique myself. Each day I spent with a different group, so I never got bogged down in the petty problems and drama of individual furs. I could go “Oh that’s really too bad” and then tag on with a different group the following day and never have to deal with it.
Not being tied to a group also allows you to meet more new people. Its easy enough to hang out with your friends. You don’t need to travel 600 miles and spend $100 a night to hang out with buddies at a convention with 3000 strangers. Its much better to meet some of those 3000 strangers, which is hard when you’re attached at the hip with some group.
So I didn’t have a great time. I didn’t have a horrible time. But I did miss Tekfox, and I did get kicked out of the Zoo for wearing an outfit that I’ve worn at dozens of conventions without incident. There weren’t really any good events or panels that I went to (well - except fitfurs which was pretty good...), and I didn’t even see many of my friends who (supposedly) went because I spent all my time tagging around with just a few individuals. Because of these reasons, I give AC a C- for 2010.
Anyway - Thanks for Reading! And I hope to see you there next year.
-jaspian