sooo done with the bullshit
"he really isn't that into you".. has anyone else read that book? It's such a silly little book, but Greg ( one of the authors) is so fucking dead on about his advice that it's disgusting.. There's all these little things that guys say or do, that we, as women, try to make excuses for. But what Greg says is point blank- HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!! It's so true... it's easier ( in some twisted and sick kind of way) to sit there and say , oh he did this because of this, or he said that because of that.. but when it comes down to it, if he really was into you, those thigns that you find yourself making excuses for? You wouldn't have to create an explanation, because one wouldn't be needed, because it wouldn't be happening. I used to think that it was a differenc between guys and girls, how we express our emotions and how stupid little things can mean everything in the world, but I think I am finally understanding that it's not a matter of gender, it;s a matter of personality. It seems like such a stupid realization, but I really started to beleive that maybe this is how things will go for the rest of my life.. I'll sit and try to do anything and everything to make my man happy, and I should NOT expect the same in return... Well, you know what? I WANT the same thing in return.. I want the little things done for me, I want to hear the little words spoken.. Is it really so hard to make me feel like you love me Vito? It's so damn confusing.... he loves me, but doesn't want ot be with me because he's scared of getting hurt. But he can still tell me he loves me on most days, he wants to spend time with me on most days and he'll sleep with me whenever possible.. but when it comes down to the important things, he can't come through. I'm leaving for mexico next weekend so I was kind of hoping that we could spend time together this weekend. well, now he's workign tonight until 12:30, i can be graced with his presence after that if i so wish, but for tomorrow he's going out wiht people from work and he doesn't want me there. I lied and told him that my girlfriends and i were going there anyways,a nd he wants me to change my plans. How's that for I love you so much? Huh? How much uncertainty can I deal with? How many times can I let my heart start to open up again only to have it stabbed again? I had this huge long discussion with him a coupel of days ago, and I explained how this situation is hurting me so much. He's tryign to tell me that he's all messed up, well you know what?I don't think I want that to be my problem anymore.. I have all of my own issues that I'm all messed up with, I don't need his shit too.. It's not my fault that he is that way he is, that is just how he is. I don't even think its his fault, but he should take ownership for the fact that he doessn't even try to fix anything... I told him the other day that even without the actual official "title" of bf/gf, my stupid heart doesn't know the difference. My feelings are still as strong, especially when i do hear that he loves and he does do some of the little things that mean everything to me... I asked him if he was scared that I'd meet someone else, and he said yes- he's thinks about it everytime we part.. So why don't you want to be with me you fuck???? All I want to know is if it is all for naught? Is it my own fault that I'm hurting like this? Probably... It would be so easy if he just told me that he didn't love me ( he's been able to do it before, it should be a whole lot easier when we aren't even together, right??) But you know what? I've either got to know if we're both going to make efforts to make this work,or if I should just move on... and you know what?? I think I've made up my mind.. I'm moving on... I've got to if I want to make it period.