I am an asshole
I said something stupid at work the other day. You see, I'm "in the people business, serving coffee" but while I can usually handle the people I serve, cumulatively they can occasionally be overbearing. My coworker and I were the only two on the floor when a sudden rush of difficult customers came upon us. The situation was challenging due to the customers being indecisive, poor communicators, rude, or just plain odd. I feel that composure is one of my strengths and I handled each customer with respect and patience while frustration was mounting under my apron. It's fairly common that in situations like this we belabored employees rehash the recent frustrating experience safely after the dust has settled. It's a healthy way of venting, I believe; a way to let out the stress and laugh about our circumstances, albeit at the customers expense.
So after things calmed down I began to remark on what a strange group of customers that was and how well we handled them by ourselves. I began with the customer who started it all by ordering something different from what she actually wanted. I made her drink as ordered and she just stared at it blankly when I set it before her. She protested she didn't order that drink, I asked her what she wanted instead. She repeated the order exactly as I prepared it and I tried to explain that I did in fact make what she ordered but would be happy to make whatever it was she wanted. She then snapped, "This is fine," and snatched the drink away like she was in a terrible hurry (it would have taken me precisely 13 seconds to amend her beverage).
As I told this story to my coworker, nearly ten minutes after the incident occurred, I glanced out to the lobby to see the woman emerge from behind a merchandise étagère and move toward the door. For a split second, I wondered whether she had heard me or not, until she said to me "it really wasn't a big deal," and stormed out - making the answer to that question extremely apparent. All I could manage to say was "Sorry."
I felt terrible, embarrassed and ashamed. I wished I could explain myself to her, but if I could, what would I possibly say? I mocked her with a coworker right in front of her. How could I defend myself? I was an utter jerk, no way around it. But here's the thing. I only feel like a jerk because I got caught. If she had left the store immediately as I believed she had, I would've had the same conversation without giving it a second thought. What does that say about me? Am I unique in this regard? Don't we all talk a little shit to those close to us about those that are distant and removed? Despite her rude tone, I don't believe that she really is a nasty person. Maybe she's down on her luck, having financial problems, just got dumped by her boyfriend - I don't know. I feel that I am a courteous fellow but I'm sure I've came across as a prick to a waitress when in a foul mood.
My point is that I felt free to make fun of her because I didn't know her and I believed her to be gone, out of the store and out of my life. I was free to make her as rude and nasty as I liked because now she was no longer a real customer, she was a part of my story about surly customers. And what's a good bad-day-at-work story without a little embellishment?
So to the woman who ordered an iced grande Americano with room (but really wanted an iced Venti Americano): I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things about you whether you were still in the store or not. I don't really believe you to be a rotten person, it's just that I caught that glint of frustration in your eye, your dissatisfaction with a beverage you paid $3 dollars for but didn't want, and the curt sharpness in your voice that revealed to me that despite what you said, it really wasn't "fine." Makes me wonder what you're writing about me in your blog?
Are we cool?
So after things calmed down I began to remark on what a strange group of customers that was and how well we handled them by ourselves. I began with the customer who started it all by ordering something different from what she actually wanted. I made her drink as ordered and she just stared at it blankly when I set it before her. She protested she didn't order that drink, I asked her what she wanted instead. She repeated the order exactly as I prepared it and I tried to explain that I did in fact make what she ordered but would be happy to make whatever it was she wanted. She then snapped, "This is fine," and snatched the drink away like she was in a terrible hurry (it would have taken me precisely 13 seconds to amend her beverage).
As I told this story to my coworker, nearly ten minutes after the incident occurred, I glanced out to the lobby to see the woman emerge from behind a merchandise étagère and move toward the door. For a split second, I wondered whether she had heard me or not, until she said to me "it really wasn't a big deal," and stormed out - making the answer to that question extremely apparent. All I could manage to say was "Sorry."
I felt terrible, embarrassed and ashamed. I wished I could explain myself to her, but if I could, what would I possibly say? I mocked her with a coworker right in front of her. How could I defend myself? I was an utter jerk, no way around it. But here's the thing. I only feel like a jerk because I got caught. If she had left the store immediately as I believed she had, I would've had the same conversation without giving it a second thought. What does that say about me? Am I unique in this regard? Don't we all talk a little shit to those close to us about those that are distant and removed? Despite her rude tone, I don't believe that she really is a nasty person. Maybe she's down on her luck, having financial problems, just got dumped by her boyfriend - I don't know. I feel that I am a courteous fellow but I'm sure I've came across as a prick to a waitress when in a foul mood.
My point is that I felt free to make fun of her because I didn't know her and I believed her to be gone, out of the store and out of my life. I was free to make her as rude and nasty as I liked because now she was no longer a real customer, she was a part of my story about surly customers. And what's a good bad-day-at-work story without a little embellishment?
So to the woman who ordered an iced grande Americano with room (but really wanted an iced Venti Americano): I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things about you whether you were still in the store or not. I don't really believe you to be a rotten person, it's just that I caught that glint of frustration in your eye, your dissatisfaction with a beverage you paid $3 dollars for but didn't want, and the curt sharpness in your voice that revealed to me that despite what you said, it really wasn't "fine." Makes me wonder what you're writing about me in your blog?
Are we cool?