[ TWO IN THE HIGH CASTLE / fst / R / excerpts of scenes from castle]

[kecen]

(art by anniselle )

Two in the High Castle

A Japan/China AU fanmix
Based on the fanfiction A Castle of Silence and Bones

Tracklisting:
1. Bear Mcreary: Blood on the Scales
2. VNV Nation: Cold
3. Bjork: An Echo, A Stain
4. Helium Vola: Du Bist Min
5. Eisbrecher: Zeichen der Venus
6. Android Lust: Follow
7. Bear Mcreary: Laura Runs
8. Kent: Dom Andra
9. Tori Amos: Bells for Her
10. Regina Spektor: Oedipus
11. Shigeru Umebayashi: Mother & Jai
12. Placebo: The Bitter End
13. Dir en Grey: Hotarubi "Light of the Firefly"

Bonus: Amanda Palmer: Boyfriend in a Coma  
[ DOWNLOAD ]



Bear Mcreary: Battlestar Galactica: Blood on the Scales

The sword, Kiku's sword, Imperial Japan's sword, cuts deeper and deeper. Even if it reaches his heart, even if it pierces his heart, he will not die, and they both know it.
Lovingly, lovingly.
It begins.

VNV Nation: Cold

"I have made it," Kiku says - and he has forgotten how many times he has said this before, "so that there is no one else for you to love," and he plants a kiss at Yao's completely-clothed waist, left hand scissoring and right hand caressing, all while Yao moans and writhes - coming, again, to Asahiko's name, golden eyes snapping open, daring Kiku to repeat the previous statement.
Kiku himself finishes a couple minutes later, his dirty fingers - four of them, that is - pressed greedily in Yao's mouth, other hand snaked around Yao's waist, pressing himself deeper and deeper and deeper still. This time, Yao's eyes are open, teeth biting hard on Kiku's already bloodied fingers, and he calls the right name.

Put your hand into my hand.
Put your head against my head
Put your lips against my lips
Put self consciousness aside

No redemption
No confessions
No distractions
No possessions
Let your blood run through my veins
Blade shall numb you from the pain
No tomorrows
Just submission
No remorse of self indulgence

Just your body
Just your body
Just your body
Just your body
Just your body on my body
Want your thoughts of me inside
Let your hands run on my skin

Let me be the one you need
I shall be the one you feed
All I am and all you see
Is all I will and ever be

Invigoration
And elation
Mortal acts of indignation

Put your lips against my lips
Put self consciousness aside

Invigoration
And elation
Mortal acts of indignation
Crave eternal
Know no other
Crash your dreams and fall forever
Show me no place you hide behind
Only body soul entwined
Let me be the one you need
I shall be the one you feed
All I am and all you feel
All that will and ever be
Invigoration
And elation
Mortal acts of indignation
Just your body on my body
Want your thoughts of me inside

No redemption
No confessions
No distractions
Or possessions
No tomorrows
Just submission
No remorse of self indulgence

Invigoration
And elation
Mortal acts of indignation

Mortal acts of VNV Nation

Björk: An Echo, A Stain

Kiku finds Yao, two hours later, near the windowsill, with an absolutely pallid expression. The child has been born - a baby boy, healthy, albeit entirely quiet. Yao, on the other hand, is mumbling some words, looking down, looking up, and then crying some more. The scene shocks Kiku more than he'd like to admit - for while Yao has not smiled in over a year, he also has not cried for almost an equal amount of time.
Simply remained there - like a doll, like his doll.
(You can't remember - you shouldn't remember.)
-
"I will love him," she promises, "When his power and will bring your nation to ruin."
She - the empress - walks to the window, and Kiku barks out a madman's laugh. She keeps her eyes trained only on the moon, and he does not see the single tear that makes it past her eyes. Kiku is fast - but for this single instant, she's faster. Because she gave him the boy, because he asked for the boy.
The Empress WanRong is much more calculating and cold-hearted than he ever had reason to believe.
She leaps from the window - falls to her death - and that is, perhaps, the most freedom she has ever been allowed.
And through it all, the child does not wake, does not stir, and does not cry.

She touched
my arm
and smiled

One of these days soon : very soon

Love you till then
love you till then
feel my breath
on your neck
and your heart will race

Don't say no to me
you can't say no to me
I won't see you
denied

I'm sorry you saw that
I'm sorry he did it

An echo
A stain...
A stain . . .

I can't say no to you
I can't say no to you
say nothing

freefalling

complete

Helium Vola: Du Bist Min

Du bist min
Ih bin din
Des solt du gewis sin
Du bist beslossen
In minem herzen
Verlorn ist daz sluzzelin
Du muost auch immer darinne sin

You are mine
I am yours
This you can be assured
I have locked you
In my heart
And thrown away the key
So you must always stay inside

Eisbrecher: Zeichen der Venus

Asahiko: fifteen years old and on the cusp of prepubescence, watches, faltering between disgusted, entranced, and fascinated. Watches Kiku-sama, whose world is Yao-hime, kiss and touch and take and defile, his lips moving, tongue darting out every so often to taste and lay claim. This is, he realizes, their everyday world - by the look of Yao-hime's limp arms and dull expression, cut short in that fleeting moment, as Kiku-sama's fingers (and Asahiko can see them crystal-clear through the four layers of silk) and mouth make Yao-hime's treasured golden eyes snap open.
-
"Kiku," Yao pronounces, shaking the other abruptly, and fully, awake. Kiku's eyes are wide, his entire body is tense; wondering if this is a dream, and why would he dream of this, except that Yao has never come into the bathroom with him. "I want more," he says, as Kiku notices that the other is wearing only the undermost layer of his nighttime kimono.
That, too, is soon shed, as Yao climbs in, sinking into the water, sitting across the tub from Kiku.

Eiskaltes Mondlicht
am Ende der Nacht
brennt meine Sehnsucht
Fühl das Feuer
Spür die Macht

Ice-cold moonlight
at the end of the night
burns my desire
Feel the fire
Sense the power

Süße Sünde küss mich
Schließ die Augen
und vermiss mich
Süße Sünde nähr mich
an deinem Feuer
und verzehr mich

Sweet sin, kiss me
Close your eyes
and miss me
Sweet sin, feed me
on your fire
and consume me

Mein Herz ist schwer
Ich bin so leer
Ich will - mehr von dir
Mehr - mehr von allem

My heart is so heavy
I am so empty
I want - more from you
More - more from everything

All meine Sinne
auf dich konzentriert
Spür wie mein Puls rast
Von deiner Leidenschaft regiert

All my senses
concentrated on you
Feel how my pulse races
How it reacts to your passion

Du heuchelst so himmlisch
Ich fühl mich so leer
Im Zeichen der Venus
Mein Herz ist so schwer

You pretend so heavenly
I feel so empty
In the sign of the Venus
My heart is so heavy

Mehr...

More...

Android Lust: Follow

"No one will ever own China," Yao simply replies, as Kiku rises easily to his feet - the insanity and anger that came as a result of his new status as a worldly superpower visibly rising in his black eyes. His hands itch to strangle, but they satisfy their lust for blood in Yao's whispers of hate, hate, hate.
"Hate me, hate me, hate me," Kiku repeats, again and again, fingers clenching, clutching - and this time, eyes fully open, lip curled back (although he still sweaty and twitching), Yao comes, hissing Kiku's name - the right name, nails digging into Kiku's shoulder's, mouth savoring Kiku's blood. This will not be the first time, Yao instinctively knows - but the end is near.
And so, the night of the first Hime Matsuri ends, dappled with tears and blood.
(It's a promise; you must keep it - bring about their fall.)

Follow
You lead I follow
Shadow
I am your shadow
I do
As you do
Walk as you walk

Stray you not lest I be lost
Follow

This hollow I take as my own
Narrow my path has grown
Cover my eyes to better
see as you see
feel what you reveal
Ecstasy at your command
Follow you lead I folow

Swallow all thoughts that bellow
Tresure each word I measure
I do as you do
I walk as you walk
I see as you see
Talk as you talk
I feel what you feel
Taste what you have spilled
Ecstacy at your command

Follow

Bear McReary: Battlestar Galactica: Laura Runs

Within nine months, the doctors have promised, and seven months have already flown by. Military campaigns (all with the highest percentages of success, of course), government reforms, and educational standards have all been made, remade, and then checked over once more. The nation itself must improve, must be ready to live (and fight and die) in the face of the rest of the world. The war is over, after all, and Japan - the island - owns the whole of Asia.

Kent: Dom Andra

The year is 1962 and the world has finished - briefly - its shake and quake and toil. There is a temporary ceasefire, and Kiku - Yao is betting on - will mistake it to be 'peace'. The two of them are, after all, far too isolated up high in their rooms in the Imperial Palace. Kiku, like Yao, cannot hear of the unrest, cannot see the dispassion in Feliciano's eyes.
Neither can Yao; but he is biding his time, waiting for the perfect moment (bets will be set, and there will be no debt to pay off, regardless of victory or defeat). There are only three empires in their current world: the Empire of Japan, the Republic of Germany, and the Italian Empire; split up between them, the various fallen countries - some are allowed to keep their tongues and cultures.
Others are tortured into acquiescence - intangibility.

-

"I will never, never, never love you," Yao promises, even as his hips are jerking upward, the hardness of his member pressed against the folds of the kimono, and Kiku releases his hold on Yao's neck, moving his fingers to brush against the apex of Yao's hip; Yao digging his long, painted (once again, once again) fingers into Kiku's hair, into Kiku's scalp.
"I have made it," Kiku says - and he has forgotten how many times he has said this before, "so that there is no one else for you to love," and he plants a kiss at Yao's completely-clothed waist, left hand scissoring and right hand caressing, all while Yao moans and writhes - coming, again, to Asahiko's name, golden eyes snapping open, daring Kiku to repeat the previous statement.

En ensam kvinna söker en man
Svar till: Hjärtat talar sant
En pessimist i sitt livs form
Jag vädrar blod, det luktar sorg
A lonely woman seeks a man
Answer to: The heart tells the truth
A pessimist in his best form
I smell blood, the scent of sorrow

En utomjordings kärlekstörst
En undran vem som svek vem först
Ät fett och socker tills du spyr
Eller blir en fyra-tonsmartyr
Sälj dig, sälj dig dyrt
The lovethirst of an alien
A wonder who betrayed who first
Eat fat and sugar till you vomit
Or become a four-ton martyr
Sell yourself, sell yourself dearly

Kom låna törnekronan min
Lid för konsten eller brinn
Jag slåss och håller kroppen varm
En dröm om mammas ömma famn
Come, borrow my thorncrown
Suffer for the art, or burn
I fight and keep the body warm
A dream of Mother's tender embrace

En utomjordings kärlekstörst
En undran vem som svek vem först
Och jag blir gärna en martyr
Vi behöver nog en ny
Sälj dig, sälj dig dyrt
The lovethirst of an alien
A wonder who betrayed who first
And I'll be happy to become a martyr
We probably need a new one
Sell yourself, sell yourself dearly

Ett långfinger åt döden
Vi gick över lik
A middle finger to death
We walked over corpses

Och skylta' med vår kärlek,
vårt rika inre liv
Men plåtarna till himlen
var slut när vi kom dit
Och priset vi betalat
För att klassas som elit
Var att vi blev som dom andra
Vi blev som dom andra
Vi blev som dom andra
And put our love on show,
our rich inner life
But the tickets to heaven
were sold-out when we arrived
And the price we'd payed
To be classed as élite
Was that we became like the others
We became like the others
We became like the others

Och vi kommer inte längre
Vi är tillbaks på noll
Men ingen kommer sörja
Vi har spelat ut vår roll
Vi glömmer hela skiten
Det betyder ingenting
Vi skulle kommit längre
Men räckte inte till
Vi blev som dom andra
Vi blev som dom andra
Vi blev som dom andra
And we won't get any further
We're back at the start
But nobody will mourn us
We've played out our part
Forget all that shit
It doesn't mean a thing
We should have gotten further
But we weren't enough
We became like the others
We became like the others
We became like the others
Tori Amos: Bells for Her

In the face of his lot in the end of the war being almost... bearable (no, stop - you speak blasphemy, revenge is the only think on your mind, on your lips, in your heart), he has promised, night after night, to not forget - to never forgive. Xiang Gang, Im-Yong Soo, Taiwan (the shriveled shell of a girl she has sunk herself into; can that be called alive?), and the Empress. Never; never; never.

and through the life force and there goes her friend
on her nishiki it's out of time
and through the portal they can make amends

hey would you say whatever we're blanket friends
can't stop what's coming
can't stop what's on its way

and through the walls they made their mudpies
i've got your mind i said
she said i've your voice
i said you don't need my voice girl
you have your own
but you never thought it was enough of
so they went years and years
like sisters blanket girls
always there through that and this
there's nothing we cannot ever fix i said

can't stop what's coming
can't stop what's on its way
bells and footfalls and soldiers and dolls
brothers and lovers she and i were
now she seems to be sand under his shoes
there's nothing i can do
can't stop what's coming
can't stop what's on its way

and now i speak to you are you in there
you have her face and her eyes
but you are not her
and we go at each other like blankettes
who can't find their thread and their bare

can't stop loving
can't stop what is on its way
and i see it coming
and it's on its way

Regina Spektor: Oedipus

And through it all, he thinks of eternity and tears - of all the lists of women who will be paraded in front of him (in front of the council - in front of the military-run council) until one will be selected. And he hopes against hope, in the face of eternity and immortality itself, that the council will somehow choose Yao as his bride.

Like that - he knows - that despite his apparent maturity, he is still a child through and through.

--

Ironic, he thinks, that he should feel such a kinship with Kiku-sama - who still comes to every council meeting, who still sits in some platform or balcony with Yao-hime during every festival - for though Asahiko has his kingdom within his fingers, dangling on a string, Kiku still has everything he wants.

I'm the king's thirty second son
Born to him in thirty second's time
Born to him the night still young
Born to him with two eyebrows on
And that's all I was wearing
When I woke up staring at the world

My momma had been a rather crazy queen
But not at all a sex machine
She liked to keep her body clean, clean
Thought the world to be quite obscene
But she retired to her chamber
And we remain quite strangers

And to see me made her awful sad
And to touch me made her awful sad
And to see me made her awful
And to touch me made her awful

I'm the king's thirty second son
And all it took was thirty second's time
But a spoiled little prince I was not
Had a chamber maid and a chamber pot
And there's thirty one others just like me
There's thirty one others I can be

Sometimes I'd stand by the royal wall
The sky'd be so big that it broke my soul
And i stood on my toes to catch a glimpse
Of my mother's eyes and my mother's skin
And she retired to her chamber
And we remain quite strangers

And to see me made her awful sad
And to touch me made her awful sad
And to see me made her awful
And to touch me made her awful

And one morning I woke up
and I thought Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus
Then one morning I woke up and I thought Rex, Rex, Rex
Then one morning I woke up
and I thought Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus
Thirty two's still a goddamn number
Thirty two's still counts
Gonna make it count
Gonna make it count
Gonna oh oh

Thirty two's still a goddamn number
Thirty two still counts
Gonna make it count
Gonna make it count
Gonna oh oh

Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the

I'm the king's thirty second son
There's thirty one others just like me
There's thirty one others on the way
There's thirty one others after that

Sometimes I stand by the royal gate
People screaming love and hate
And they scream
And they scream
And they scream
And they scream
Long live the king,
long live the queen

And to see me made her awful sad
And to touch me made her awful sad
And to see me made her awful
And to touch me made her awful

And one morning I woke up
and I thought Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus
Then one morning I woke up and I thought Rex, Rex, Rex
Then one morning I woke up
and I thought Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus
Thirty two's still a goddamn number
Thirty two's still counts
Gonna make it count
Gonna make it count
Gonna oh oh

Thirty two's still a goddamn number
Thirty two's still a goddamn number
Thirty two's still a goddamn number
Thirty two's still a goddamn number

Thirty two
Thirty two
Thirty two
Thirty two
Thirty two
Thirty two
Thirty two

Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Long live the king
Shigeru Umebayashi: Curse of the Golden Flower: Mother & Jai

Yao creeps into his room in the dead of the night; warm fingers, fluttering robe, light and lilting voice. For the first time, Asahiko - in an entranced stupor - thinks the person whose body is illuminated by the barely-there light of the hallway is his long-dead mother. And then Yao speaks, soft but pliant all the same, and the only thing Asahiko knows how to say is yes, yes, yes.
It is smart of Yao, he thinks later, to ask for a promise in the dead of the night. And it is foolish of himself - and still, he is only twenty-two years old, and no more mistakes will be made - to agree, and then think himself dignified enough to keep such a promise.

Placebo: The Bitter End
Since we're feeling so anesthetized
In our comfort zone
Reminds me of the second time
That I followed you home

We're running out of alibis
From the second of May
Reminds me of the summer time
On this winter's day

See you at the bitter end
See you at the bitter end

Every step we take that's synchronized
Every broken bone
Reminds me of the second time
That I followed you home

You shower me with lullabies
As you're walking away
Reminds me that it's killing time
On this fateful day

See you at the bitter end
See you at the bitter end
See you at the bitter end
See you at the bitter end

From the time we intercepted
Feels more like suicide...

See you at the bitter end
Dir en Grey: 蛍火 (Hotarubi): Light of the Firefly

"And then," Kiku continues, as Yao averts his golden, golden eyes (Kiku's are too - too dark - for him), "then you will always remember me," and his grin could be almost lopsided - tantalizing and painful, if not entirely nostalgic (and Yao forces himself to stop thinking of Nihon, to stop thinking of the little boy Kiku will never be again), preening up to brush his forehead against Yao's dry lips.

"I only love him because of you," Yao responds, because he knows the memory of him - writhing and wanton and calling out Asahiko's name - is still fresh in the other's mind. There is some shred of truth in that statement, and Kiku laughs, a bitter unknowing parody of Ludwig. "I..." it will be four thousand years soon, and he has known Kiku for half of that, and still, Yao thinks there to be a happy ending, "I see the old you in him," he tries - strives towards.

"There is no 'old me'; I've always been like this," Kiku soberly retorts, and edge of envy and anger in his voice that Yao is all-too-used to hearing. "And besides, you love him because he is the child of your last Empress."

Furuboketa shashin dake ga
Hi wo kasane yuku
Hi wo tomoshi kazaguruma de
Ayashi namida ga
Only in this worn-out photograph
do the days repeat.
I'll set it on fire, and calm the tears
with a pinwheel.

Kago ni yurayura yureteta
Akago waratte
Swaying softly in the cradle,
the infant laughs.

Ra ra sayonara
Ra ra yoru ga fuke
Lala, farewell.
Lala, the night deepens.

Anata aishita kono ko ni
Anata kasanete
Anata ima soba ni yuku wa
Kono ko to futari
To this child, whom you loved,
you return and
now you walk side by side
with this child.

Ra ra sayonara
Ra ra yoru ga ake
Lala, farewell.
Lala, the dawn breaks.

Minamo ni ukabu anata dake senjou no naka utsushidasu
Floating on the surface of the water, you are the only one reflected on the battlefield.

Kaze ni naru kamikaze wa
Yami no naka he kiete
Saikai no yoru ni saku
Hotaru no hikari
Kamikaze turn into wind
and disappear into the darkness.
They bloom on the night of reunion,
the light of the fireflies.

Kaze ni naru kamikaze wa
Yami no naka he kiete
Saikai no yoru ni saku
Yuritachi no sugata
Kamikaze turn into wind
and disappear into the darkness.
They bloom on the night of reunion,
the silhouettes of the lilies.

Kaze ni naru kamikaze wa
Saikai no yoru ni saku
Hotarubi to yuri no hana
Kamikaze turn into wind
and bloom on the night of our reunion
as firefly light and lily flowers.

Amanda Palmer: Boyfriend in a Coma (live at Cambridge 2004)
*these lyrics are a combination of the 2004 live version and the 2008 demo version, so they don't match up 100%

Kiku can feel the other's deep, aching breathes, and he wraps his arms about Yao, sucking him off completely before untangling the two of them. He thinks he cannot sleep, will-not-sleep, when he's covering the other with a thicker blanket, taking in the even breaths and tear-stained face.
He runs, haphazardly - as if through a dream - across the whole of the palace, looking for Yao. He hears the other's name, echoing across the corridors, and it's only after the fifth time, when he simply grabs a vase and smashes it on the closest wall, does he realize it was his voice, repeating across the halls.
-
And so, he acts. With the signatures of the war generals (heroes of the people), with the acquiescence of the Empress (she had hid her tears; he had refused to see them), he goes to the innermost chamber of the Imperial Palace. The guards know he is, and he needs only give a nod of the head, before they bow their way out. And despite this resolution, this lack of inner turmoil - because he sees the lines, and he sees where to walk and how to walk - he hesitates before turning the knob.
-
"She has a husband," Yao continues, "That child - her husband - " coherency is lacking, but it matters not. Kiku leans down, planting a slow kiss atop Yao's eyelids, runs a hand - ungloved for once - down perfectly-combed locks.
(This is his reason for the war.)

You're not here tonight
But I trust that
You are safe and tight
So I can sleep fast

The moon was at your side
It just hid, the
Sun is paralyzed
But I'm a savior

Let me at him
I can fix it
Just a quick one
Nothing to it

Just like Tina
Gypsy queen did
I can fuck you
Back to life, kid

Waking with a start
I remember
Where you really are
And how you got there

I took both your arms
And your eyes fell
Straight into my heart
And out the other -

Sight is all you've got
So I'll watch you
Translate every thought
And I'll scream for you

Shut the beds off
Here's the password
Dance around the dark
Don't answer

Cuff the masses
Stuff their mouths full
Make them see
It is so simple

Did I say too much?
Are you angry?
Are you safe to touch?
Or will you hurt me?
Who made all this mess?
I did, I did
Are you safe to touch?
Or will you hurt me?

Who made all this mess?
I did I did!
I'll come back at ten
And kiss your eyelids

There's no more to ask
You are dreaming
But until you're back
I'll keep screaming

Shut the beds off
Here's the password
Dance around the dark
Don't answer

Cuff the masses
Stuff their mouths full
Make them learn it by example

Tie the nurses to the doctors
make them have to see each other
They will fall in love completely
It's amazing, call me crazy

One look away and you're dead
We are so weak in the end
When you are able to breathe
I think that I'll still believe
Love comes in moments like these
Love comes in moments like these

&