Aug 18, 2008 11:45
Ready?
We don't want to need men, but sometimes, for just a short bit, we do need them.
Not in that weepy validation way, or the white knight solves all the problems way, and not in a sexual way, but in a much more primitive way.
The way that a male protects the females of a group, so that in this world that seems occasionally hellbent on hurting us and making us feel like crap, there is shelter, warmth and safety. A chance for a respite to catch our breath and prepare to fight onward again. A connection between two members of the same species in their respective animal roles.
If you're reading this as anti-girl-power, you're missing the point. It's not about control or subservience, it's about comfort and health. Yes health. It's healthy for a human to find an environment with another human where they feel safe and relaxed. And for those females who are straight or bi w/ disposition towards men, those kinds of feelings come about more easily and naturally with males. I've not had any in-depth discussions with lesbians on this or any related topics so anything I say on that would be PURE speculation and not one I want to try.
Obviously you can't just find any old person to feel that way with, so it's not about just physical contact. It's openness and trust as well. Which is why it CAN involve sexual relations, but it's not required. By the reverse, just having sex randomly will not get you to that spot. It may feel like it on the surface, but in the back of your mind all the fears and doubts and misgivings and guilt (maybe just the tiniest sliver) will be churning around.
In trying to be seen as equals we've said that we can stand on our own thank you very much, and in turn painted ourselves into the corner of "stand alone or be seen as weak and unworthy," but yet we still have the hind-brain need for meaningful connections with the opposite gender.
Maybe I'm speaking truth or maybe this is all a product of my backwards brain, but this is how I feel right now, so that's what I'm writing. Take it as you will and kindly leave any comments you wish.