Don't Just Shoot Cupid
OPEN: JANUS FILE #0378
This particular entry has been simmering on the back burner, so to speak, for several months now. It started when I picked up The Day I Shot Cupid at the library . . . or maybe I saw it at the bookstore first. Wherever I saw it first, I checked it out of the library, mainly because the title caught my attention. And as I started looking through it, the beginnings of an entry began forming in my subconscious. And since today is Valentine's Day, it seemed to be the right time to finally write it, with some appropriately romantic music in the background. (In this case, that would be Bon Jovi's "You Give Love A Bad Name.")
As I said, it was the title that caught my attention. But as I flipped through the book, a few things surprised me. For one, Jennifer Love Hewitt is a pretty decent writer. For another, she seems to have a slightly twisted sense of humor (I like that in a person).
Some things didn't surprise me. For instance, her statement that she was a hopeless romantic. She came within a week of being a Valentine's Day baby, and for Persephone's sake, take a good look at her middle name, people! As Ms. Hewitt put it, "Hello? I was born to be a hopeless romantic." But then she started talking about how in at least one version of the Cupid myth, Cupid used his arrows to make people fall out of love. The more she thought about it, the more she realized that what she needed was to shoot Cupid (hence, the title of the book).
Nice idea, but I tend to think that shooting Cupid is letting him off way too easy. One illustration in the book shows Cupid smoking a cigarette, while a barrage of arrows is being fired at him. Nice, but that still isn't enough.
I think the proper treatment (or at least a good start) for Cupid would be to chain him to a rock, and have an eagle gnaw at his liver every day. The liver would regenerate overnight, just in time for the eagle to visit again. (For those of you who are less than completely cognizant with Greek mythology, that is the punishment meted out to Prometheus for giving fire to man.) I still think that might be much too mild a punishment for Cupid, though. There needs to be more pain involved.
I'm enjoying the rest of the book as well. There is one section, though, that still has me trying to decide whether it is really, really hilarious . . . or TMI. And of course, this is the section that caused me to search out the book in the first place. That would be the section on vajazzling.
Okay, a little backtrack. I first became aware of The Day I Shot Cupid after I caught a YouTube clip of Ms. Hewitt on Lopez Tonight. In the segment, she was talking with George Lopez about the book. She then totally surprised him by mentioning the section where she described having a . . . certain part of her anatomy decorated with Swarovski crystals. When she said that it looked like a little disco ball, Lopez replied, "Who said disco sucks?"
There is one thing about that section (pages 107-109 of the hardcover edition, by the way) that I am glad Ms. Hewitt mentioned. She said that the first week after she had this done, she had an uncontrollable urge to show off her decoration, but managed to resist. For that, I have to say one thing: Thank you very much, Ms. Hewitt. I feel quite certain that if you had given in to that urge, there would have been photos plastered all over the tabloids. And you have much more class than that.
When I logged into the LiveJournal side of The Janus Files, I discovered that the Writer's Block question of the day was, "If you had the power, would you permanently eliminate Valentine's Day?"
You know, it would be tempting. But if I eliminated Valentine's Day, I would also be eliminating the day after, when all of that candy in the stores is discounted 50% or more.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0378
This particular entry has been simmering on the back burner, so to speak, for several months now. It started when I picked up The Day I Shot Cupid at the library . . . or maybe I saw it at the bookstore first. Wherever I saw it first, I checked it out of the library, mainly because the title caught my attention. And as I started looking through it, the beginnings of an entry began forming in my subconscious. And since today is Valentine's Day, it seemed to be the right time to finally write it, with some appropriately romantic music in the background. (In this case, that would be Bon Jovi's "You Give Love A Bad Name.")
As I said, it was the title that caught my attention. But as I flipped through the book, a few things surprised me. For one, Jennifer Love Hewitt is a pretty decent writer. For another, she seems to have a slightly twisted sense of humor (I like that in a person).
Some things didn't surprise me. For instance, her statement that she was a hopeless romantic. She came within a week of being a Valentine's Day baby, and for Persephone's sake, take a good look at her middle name, people! As Ms. Hewitt put it, "Hello? I was born to be a hopeless romantic." But then she started talking about how in at least one version of the Cupid myth, Cupid used his arrows to make people fall out of love. The more she thought about it, the more she realized that what she needed was to shoot Cupid (hence, the title of the book).
Nice idea, but I tend to think that shooting Cupid is letting him off way too easy. One illustration in the book shows Cupid smoking a cigarette, while a barrage of arrows is being fired at him. Nice, but that still isn't enough.
I think the proper treatment (or at least a good start) for Cupid would be to chain him to a rock, and have an eagle gnaw at his liver every day. The liver would regenerate overnight, just in time for the eagle to visit again. (For those of you who are less than completely cognizant with Greek mythology, that is the punishment meted out to Prometheus for giving fire to man.) I still think that might be much too mild a punishment for Cupid, though. There needs to be more pain involved.
I'm enjoying the rest of the book as well. There is one section, though, that still has me trying to decide whether it is really, really hilarious . . . or TMI. And of course, this is the section that caused me to search out the book in the first place. That would be the section on vajazzling.
Okay, a little backtrack. I first became aware of The Day I Shot Cupid after I caught a YouTube clip of Ms. Hewitt on Lopez Tonight. In the segment, she was talking with George Lopez about the book. She then totally surprised him by mentioning the section where she described having a . . . certain part of her anatomy decorated with Swarovski crystals. When she said that it looked like a little disco ball, Lopez replied, "Who said disco sucks?"
There is one thing about that section (pages 107-109 of the hardcover edition, by the way) that I am glad Ms. Hewitt mentioned. She said that the first week after she had this done, she had an uncontrollable urge to show off her decoration, but managed to resist. For that, I have to say one thing: Thank you very much, Ms. Hewitt. I feel quite certain that if you had given in to that urge, there would have been photos plastered all over the tabloids. And you have much more class than that.
When I logged into the LiveJournal side of The Janus Files, I discovered that the Writer's Block question of the day was, "If you had the power, would you permanently eliminate Valentine's Day?"
You know, it would be tempting. But if I eliminated Valentine's Day, I would also be eliminating the day after, when all of that candy in the stores is discounted 50% or more.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0378