Love...Hate..it's basically the same thing sometimes
Ah Target....I really should stay out of that store! Yesterday I found myself in two separate stores. Between their great socks, and the hats in the guys department (what the hell guys, girls aren't allowed to have awesome hats?!?!)...yeah, I really should just avoid that store like I avoid bookstores. There is so much want, and so very little money. And leave it to me to do something stupid. See, with summer coming...and Eric's fervent desire to visit the coast for his birthday....I need a new swimsuit ¬_¬
Honestly I feel like someone who's been told Christmas has been canceled. I hate, loath, despise and abominate swimsuits....places where people congregate in swimsuits....people who look better than me in skimpy swimsuits....and by the end of the humiliating day, the entire human race in general! RAWR! So yeah, if I didn't like him so much I'd tell Eric to take his "beach" wish and go play in traffic. Seriously, I have body image issues and having to confront them on a beach, face to face with plastic-ly enhanced bimbos is not my idea of a fun time! At all!
So, I must've suddenly gone completely God-rotting stupid, because I was browsing at Target and caught myself thinking "well, I should at least try to find a better suit while I'm here." Even knowing this was a bad idea, I still did it. I still pulled a few items, still took them to the fitting room, still put them on, and as what usually happens when reality comes rampaging back into view.....had to look at myself in the mirror. ... Yeah, it wasn't pleasant.
Unsurprisingly I usually devolve into a pile of anger, shame , wangst and comfort eating and/or spending immediately. Though yesterday, I was able to hold it together fairly well...for a while that is. Like I was in some sick kind of denial. It wasn't till I walked past the socks that I lost my restraint. In my defense, I only bought three pairs. One was on clearance, and one was a two pack. So yes, I call that restraint. Don't judge me!
Later, Eric wanted to go by Target to look for Easter pants for himself. I figured it was fair, since he helped me pick out my dress. (still need to find a sweater though). We were walking through the t-shirt section and I continue to be pissed that guys get the better shirt selection than girls do. Theirs has the funniest sayings and the coolest stuff.
Girls get stupid stuff like "Sugar Daddy" and "Born to be a Diva" emblazoned across our tits. What if I want something about Star Wars or Sesame Street? Why do I have to be up shit creek simply because I was born with mammaries? And why should I have to shop in the boys department, where all the penis's wonder if I'm batting for the other team! This quandary is another sure sign that I should quit shopping actually at Target. Plus it would help promote my hermit-training regiment if I simply became an online shopper only. In the words of the Doctor. "Hermits unite!" God, now that's a shirt I need. Oh Cafepress....how I love thee, let me spend the ways!
So yes, in conclusion...Target and I have a love/hate relationship. Though, despite my better judgment I will still probably wander in there to be tempted by their socks. Mmmmm....socks
Honestly I feel like someone who's been told Christmas has been canceled. I hate, loath, despise and abominate swimsuits....places where people congregate in swimsuits....people who look better than me in skimpy swimsuits....and by the end of the humiliating day, the entire human race in general! RAWR! So yeah, if I didn't like him so much I'd tell Eric to take his "beach" wish and go play in traffic. Seriously, I have body image issues and having to confront them on a beach, face to face with plastic-ly enhanced bimbos is not my idea of a fun time! At all!
So, I must've suddenly gone completely God-rotting stupid, because I was browsing at Target and caught myself thinking "well, I should at least try to find a better suit while I'm here." Even knowing this was a bad idea, I still did it. I still pulled a few items, still took them to the fitting room, still put them on, and as what usually happens when reality comes rampaging back into view.....had to look at myself in the mirror. ... Yeah, it wasn't pleasant.
Unsurprisingly I usually devolve into a pile of anger, shame , wangst and comfort eating and/or spending immediately. Though yesterday, I was able to hold it together fairly well...for a while that is. Like I was in some sick kind of denial. It wasn't till I walked past the socks that I lost my restraint. In my defense, I only bought three pairs. One was on clearance, and one was a two pack. So yes, I call that restraint. Don't judge me!
Later, Eric wanted to go by Target to look for Easter pants for himself. I figured it was fair, since he helped me pick out my dress. (still need to find a sweater though). We were walking through the t-shirt section and I continue to be pissed that guys get the better shirt selection than girls do. Theirs has the funniest sayings and the coolest stuff.
Girls get stupid stuff like "Sugar Daddy" and "Born to be a Diva" emblazoned across our tits. What if I want something about Star Wars or Sesame Street? Why do I have to be up shit creek simply because I was born with mammaries? And why should I have to shop in the boys department, where all the penis's wonder if I'm batting for the other team! This quandary is another sure sign that I should quit shopping actually at Target. Plus it would help promote my hermit-training regiment if I simply became an online shopper only. In the words of the Doctor. "Hermits unite!" God, now that's a shirt I need. Oh Cafepress....how I love thee, let me spend the ways!
So yes, in conclusion...Target and I have a love/hate relationship. Though, despite my better judgment I will still probably wander in there to be tempted by their socks. Mmmmm....socks