(no subject)
*grabs a blanket, wrapping it around her shoulders trying to get warm. she takes a quick sip of her hot chocolate, then sets it back on her desk, a naked shoulder falling out from under the blanket. She blinks once, twice, three times before rubbing her cheek against the shoulder and opening up her journal. She starts to type...*
I can't sleep for some reason. Theres a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach. I dont know what to do about it. Maybe its all the drama my best friend is going through. I dont know what to do to solve that problem. *Thinks back to the conversation she had with KD* If only there really were a drama rehab. Drama rips people apart and theres nothing you can really do about it.
I think all these years I've tried to cover up the fact that I was still depressed. I covered it with laughter, with smiles. And people believed it. I tried convincing myself that I was a-okay, but deep down I knew I wasnt. Im always trying to help people with their own problems, when really I need help myself. Now Im not looking for a pity party or any of that shit...I just really needed to get my feelings out. Isnt that what this journal is for anyways?
what I want for myself in this new year is to be happy with me. To love myself completely. I need to learn how to love myself before I love anyone else. Once I love myself maybe I can find myself a lover too.
*frowns* I need to start working out again too. The abs are somewhat there...they just need to be re-defined. *nods*
Why am I, all of a sudden, bustin' out with these long ass posts? I bet no one reads them either...Long ass posts, and like no comments *shrugs* Oh well...Lata Dayz
Im GONE...
I can't sleep for some reason. Theres a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach. I dont know what to do about it. Maybe its all the drama my best friend is going through. I dont know what to do to solve that problem. *Thinks back to the conversation she had with KD* If only there really were a drama rehab. Drama rips people apart and theres nothing you can really do about it.
I think all these years I've tried to cover up the fact that I was still depressed. I covered it with laughter, with smiles. And people believed it. I tried convincing myself that I was a-okay, but deep down I knew I wasnt. Im always trying to help people with their own problems, when really I need help myself. Now Im not looking for a pity party or any of that shit...I just really needed to get my feelings out. Isnt that what this journal is for anyways?
what I want for myself in this new year is to be happy with me. To love myself completely. I need to learn how to love myself before I love anyone else. Once I love myself maybe I can find myself a lover too.
*frowns* I need to start working out again too. The abs are somewhat there...they just need to be re-defined. *nods*
Why am I, all of a sudden, bustin' out with these long ass posts? I bet no one reads them either...Long ass posts, and like no comments *shrugs* Oh well...Lata Dayz
Im GONE...