... hi.
I've been ... on a break?
Sort of. I've been around, but not really ... doing anything.
Ugh. I had this whole post in my head, but then my mood kind of nosedived and ... eh.
Anyway. The upshot is that I realised something had to give, between family, work, fandom and other stuff like ... reading books. So it's been fandom, and writing.
It was a surprisingly easy decision to make. I've been lurking my twitter feed, and the comms, but not really engaging. And it's peaceful. I've been mostly hanging out with Patrick and playing silly only-makes-sense-to-3YOs games, and reading a bit. Uh ... books - lol.
Usually, fic-wise, I read everything, but with my primary fandom (Lambliff/Ratbert/Atom/~adommy I've finally started to winnow it down to authors that I know I'm going to like, and let the rest of it go. Which basically covers everything anyway; not that I read in that many fandoms. And ... this is getting off-topic and rambly fast.
Not that this post really has a point as such, but I'd feel weird I think, not doing a Sunday post when I'm getting into the habit.
Not that I've been writing. But I'm not all twisted up about it either. I don't feel blocked; I just haven't had time. Between a very active toddler, and work, I haven't had the time or energy that I need to really put the effort in that I'd like to.
And, I've decided in my brief hiatus, that's okay. It's okay to down tools and look up from the laptop once in a while. And I need to keep doing that. I have an amazing, energetic, gorgeous son, who is growing up way, way, way too fast, and I want to try and catch as much of that three-year-old lightning in a bottle as I can.
I'm still figuring out how to trip the balance between toddler/life/work/fandom/writing/other stuff, and it's entirely possible I may never have the answer. Stepping back from twitter has been good for me, and these past few days have been far less stressful (although I've been keeping up with a few people via DMs - can't quite let you go, twitter), and while this post means I'm sort of "back", I'm not planning on burying myself in twitter/fandom again like I have been.
I got into the AI fandom (sort of - lol) last year by writing, and for a long time, that's all I did. Just peacably wrote fic, posted it, and carried on. I'd ... sort of like to get back to that. I've said it to various people before, and I can see how hard it is to extricate yourself from fandom once you've jumped in. And, like always, I jumped first, then looked around later and went "Wait, what? GIVE ME BACK MY TIME!" I don't want my son growing up with my hunched over back and the sound of tapping away at the keyboard being his earliest memory.
So I've figured out some of it. Well, the toddler part anyway, who really just wants my time, and if I can't give my son my time, when all I would be doing otherwise is being on the internet, then what kind of a mother am I? (Dislcaimer: I'm writing this at 1am ...)
And the work part is ... work, I guess. The good thing about my job is that the work has to be done in the office, and ideally inside eight hours. It's one of the good things about working in a deadline-driven industry. The bad thing is, of course, that sometimes those eight hours seem like twice that and leave you drained and exhausted. But I'm getting there, slowly.
So, that's two things. Life ... as the man said (happy 70th this week, John Lennon) - life is what happens when we're making other plans. So I'm trying to not make any plans ;)
I kind of miss writing, though, and the stories are still telling themselves in my head, like always. But instead of making a list this week, I'm just going to ... see what happens.
So ... I'm sort of back ... ish?
Sort of. I've been around, but not really ... doing anything.
Ugh. I had this whole post in my head, but then my mood kind of nosedived and ... eh.
Anyway. The upshot is that I realised something had to give, between family, work, fandom and other stuff like ... reading books. So it's been fandom, and writing.
It was a surprisingly easy decision to make. I've been lurking my twitter feed, and the comms, but not really engaging. And it's peaceful. I've been mostly hanging out with Patrick and playing silly only-makes-sense-to-3YOs games, and reading a bit. Uh ... books - lol.
Usually, fic-wise, I read everything, but with my primary fandom (Lambliff/Ratbert/Atom/~adommy I've finally started to winnow it down to authors that I know I'm going to like, and let the rest of it go. Which basically covers everything anyway; not that I read in that many fandoms. And ... this is getting off-topic and rambly fast.
Not that this post really has a point as such, but I'd feel weird I think, not doing a Sunday post when I'm getting into the habit.
Not that I've been writing. But I'm not all twisted up about it either. I don't feel blocked; I just haven't had time. Between a very active toddler, and work, I haven't had the time or energy that I need to really put the effort in that I'd like to.
And, I've decided in my brief hiatus, that's okay. It's okay to down tools and look up from the laptop once in a while. And I need to keep doing that. I have an amazing, energetic, gorgeous son, who is growing up way, way, way too fast, and I want to try and catch as much of that three-year-old lightning in a bottle as I can.
I'm still figuring out how to trip the balance between toddler/life/work/fandom/writing/other stuff, and it's entirely possible I may never have the answer. Stepping back from twitter has been good for me, and these past few days have been far less stressful (although I've been keeping up with a few people via DMs - can't quite let you go, twitter), and while this post means I'm sort of "back", I'm not planning on burying myself in twitter/fandom again like I have been.
I got into the AI fandom (sort of - lol) last year by writing, and for a long time, that's all I did. Just peacably wrote fic, posted it, and carried on. I'd ... sort of like to get back to that. I've said it to various people before, and I can see how hard it is to extricate yourself from fandom once you've jumped in. And, like always, I jumped first, then looked around later and went "Wait, what? GIVE ME BACK MY TIME!" I don't want my son growing up with my hunched over back and the sound of tapping away at the keyboard being his earliest memory.
So I've figured out some of it. Well, the toddler part anyway, who really just wants my time, and if I can't give my son my time, when all I would be doing otherwise is being on the internet, then what kind of a mother am I? (Dislcaimer: I'm writing this at 1am ...)
And the work part is ... work, I guess. The good thing about my job is that the work has to be done in the office, and ideally inside eight hours. It's one of the good things about working in a deadline-driven industry. The bad thing is, of course, that sometimes those eight hours seem like twice that and leave you drained and exhausted. But I'm getting there, slowly.
So, that's two things. Life ... as the man said (happy 70th this week, John Lennon) - life is what happens when we're making other plans. So I'm trying to not make any plans ;)
I kind of miss writing, though, and the stories are still telling themselves in my head, like always. But instead of making a list this week, I'm just going to ... see what happens.
So ... I'm sort of back ... ish?