A Shadow of Perfection (Chap 3)
Kahlan woke with a start, sitting bolt upright in bed. Her head swayed slightly, and she placed her hand against her temple in an attempt to alleviate the sensation.
Where in the name of the spirits am I?
The first thing that alerted her that something was wrong was the fact that she was sitting on a bed - not her bedroll that she remembered laying out next to Richard’s the night before - a proper bed with a thin cotton sheet. That, and the fact that her head was throbbing like she had downed half a keg of ale.
Richard!
She threw back the covers and jumped out of the bed, ignoring the headache as her bare feet hit the cool wooden floor. She ran out the doorway into the small kitchen where she had eaten the previous night. She didn’t know whether still being in Shota’s house calmed her or gave her more cause for concern. She hurried over to the corner which was now empty of the bedrolls and packs that had lain there the night before.
“Richard?” Her voice was strong, echoing in the confines of the small house. She stood still for a moment, waiting for any response, then raced over to the door and opened it to the morning sun. “Richard!”
She could feel her rate of breathing increase as she scanned outside the house desperately, but there was no sign of him.
Or Shota.
She vaguely remembered Richard saying he had a bad feeling about this place, and as much as she wanted to deny it, her current predicament was making truth of that comment. She looked around the kitchen again. Everything seemed to be in order; there was nothing out of place or broken to indicate there had been any altercation. Surely Richard wouldn’t have left without her?
Her mind tried to come up with logical reasons why he may have needed to leave, but she soon dismissed them; he would never go without at least telling her why, or when he would be back. And it also did not explain why all her stuff was missing…or where Shota was. She lifted the hem of her Confessor dress and stared at her feet. And where are my boots?
She released the grip on her dress and hurried through the small abode, her concern growing as each room seemed empty of clues. She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to come up with a plan, but her rising panic was making it difficult. She brought her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose; at least her head wasn’t throbbing quite as much since she had started moving around. For lack of a better plan, she decided to make her way to the path that lead east and hopefully come up with something more useful on the way.
She started to make her way back to the kitchen, her stare focused on the door leading outside, and she was but a few steps from it when a glint of light caught the corner of her eye. She turned her head towards the source, and shielded her eyes as the sun reflected off a thin layer of liquid held within a large bowl. As Kahlan edged closer she could just make out a swirl of colours, but the bright light bouncing off the surface prevented her from deciphering anything more. She continued until she was standing over the bowl, the change in angle removing the glare and allowing her to see the image lurking within the enchanted waters.
Her eyes widened when she saw him. She could see the muscles of his back moving as he crouched over something. A mild breeze from the window was causing the surface to ripple so the vision went in and out of focus. She shielded her hands protectively on the far side of the bowl, preventing the wind from disturbing the scene and waited anxiously as the waves settled. She squinted slightly as the picture became clearer: he was still crouched, his bare back glistening in the sun.
And someone’s hands were seductively sliding up his spine.
Kahlan couldn’t stop the rush of air escaping from her mouth, the force of it creating a fresh set of ripples. Her breath halted for a moment as the disturbance settled once more and she felt her mouth go dry as she saw the fingers of his companion were now clutched in his hair, holding him close as they kissed. Kahlan placed one hand over her mouth as her breaths came out in rapid bursts, her eyes crinkling in consternation. She almost pulled away from the sight - the mere thought of someone else’s hands on Richard sent a wave of both jealousy and sorrow coursing through her - but she needed to see who it was. It seemed an eon passed before she saw the muscles in Richard’s back tense as he pushed himself away from the figure beneath him, and she could finally see who was lying there.
The bowl was nearly knocked from the bench as Kahlan stumbled backwards when she saw herself. She threw her hands up to cradle either side of her head. It didn’t make any sense. Was it another of Shota’s visions? Was Richard going to be confessed, just as she had feared might happen ever since that night in the woods where his kiss alone had been enough to make her lose her judgement? Surely she could be strong enough to prevent it from happening.
She paced aimlessly. She wanted to believe she had the willpower to stop her emotions before they took over completely, but she couldn’t deny the truth: each moment she spent with Richard, she could feel her resolve diminishing. Maybe one day she would finally break.
No. She could feel the determination of her inner voice. I won’t let it happen.
She closed her eyes, trying to clear her mind, and she suddenly heard the whisper of a husky voice in her mind: Zedd’s wise words cautioning her about the dangers of prophecy; to trust in her instincts; to be wary of interpretation.
She took a deep breath. There had to be another explanation. Letting her imagination get carried away the last time she had taken note of one of Shota’s prophecies had almost gotten Richard killed. What had she learned from her previous mistake?
Don’t trust Shota. Kahlan thought back over each of the incidents in which Shota had been involved and they always ended in trouble. Accusations, riddles and illusions were second nature to her.
And the answer became blatantly obvious: illusion.
“Oh no.” She took a few steps back from the bowl, her hand resting over her thumping heart. The only reason she could see herself in the bowl was because it was the illusion Shota needed to create; the image she needed Richard to see.
Kahlan didn’t know the purpose behind the sorcery, she just knew she needed to get to Richard as quickly as possible. She yanked the door open and started running. She wasn’t sure what enchantment had been placed on the bowl - whether she had been glimpsing into a potential future, or gazing at the present - she just hoped she had enough time to avert the outcome.
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“Kahlan, wait.” He grabbed her wrist just as her fingers edged beneath the rim of his pants.
Her hand stopped its motion and she diverted her attention back to his face. She chewed the corner of her bottom lip; he knew she could still taste him from the way she licked at the area and he could see she was still trying to catch her breath from their last kiss as he stared down at her. Her other hand was still holding the back of his head, and she tangled her fingers through his hair.
“No more waiting, Richard.” Her wide eyes pleaded with him. “We have already waited so long.”
“I know, Kahlan,” he said, pushing her wrist back until it came to rest beside her head. “During all that time, I thought of this moment on countless occasions.”
“And now it is here.” She smiled up at him as she spoke. “So why only think of it?”
He sighed as he gazed upon the woman lying beneath him, wanting to choose his words carefully. “I just don’t know if I can quite believe this is all really happening; that we may finally have the chance to be together without you accidentally confessing me.”
Her hand slid from behind his neck, her index finger tracing a tortuous path down his sternum and across his abdomen until it reached his belly-button. He grabbed at the corresponding wrist with his free hand and pushed it down so it also rested beside her face.
“Don’t you trust me?” A hint of concern flashed across her face.
He gave a dismissive shake of his head. “It’s not that at all. I know you would never willingly go along with this if you thought you may harm me.” He glanced over his shoulder as though an unknown force may be lurking in the shadows, then turned back to her. “It’s just that even though you feel like your power is suppressed, how do you know for sure? I still have a niggling feeling this may all be an elaborate trick.”
“I have had a life-time to know what it feels like to live with this power. And when I walked into this clearing, it felt like a weight had been lifted from my soul. I would have walked straight back into the woods without placing a single kiss on you if I thought there was chance I could confess you. You are too important.”
“Don’t you see, Kahlan, it’s not me I am worried about if you confess me. I already feel like I am a slave to you.” He dipped his head a little closer, hoping it would support the sincerity of his words. “But I know it would break you, to know you had caused it.” He moved lower until his cheek brushed against hers, whispering in her ear. “And the thought of you having to live with that is too much for me to bear.”
He felt her fingers curl around his own, and he lifted his head until he was once again looking into her eyes.
“Richard, I don’t want to let this chance pass us by.” He could see the desperation in her features. “I know my power isn’t going to work here. There is no way I could have made it this far without feeling it try to break free.” She moved her head up slightly, as though she was going to kiss him, but he pulled back a fraction with an unsure look on his face, and she let her head fall back against the grass. “I promise I will tell you if I feel it resurfacing.”
“You think you can do that?” Richard watched her nod in response and he waited for several seconds before he released his grip on both her arms, instead resting them beside her as he straddled her. “I hope you are right, because what I have been feeling is so intense that at times my mind isn’t able to think clearly at all.”
He let her draw his head down for a brief kiss, and he could feel the smile on her lips. As he pulled back, her hand innocently drifted over his shoulder and across his throat until it rested at the base of his neck. He clutched at her hand, holding it in place and he saw it dawn on her where she was touching him. She made to pull her hand back, but he held it steady.
He glanced at the pine tree, then back at her. “Now, Kahlan, I ask the same question of you: do you trust me?”
She hesitated for a moment, and he could see her mind ticking over, wondering what he was thinking. She swallowed deeply, then gave him a determined nod. “Yes.”
He closed his eyes for a few seconds, willing himself to say the words. “Then let me bind your hands.” He opened his eyes, worried what her reaction might be and hurriedly continued so she could understand his reasoning. “I have seen when you confess people. When you reach out to them, it is almost like a reflex.” He hoped the concern in his voice would help convince her. “If you feel that sensation, it will give you enough time to warn me.”
She seemed reluctant at first, so Richard bent down and gently placed his lips against her forehead, and he felt the furrows of worry begin to dissipate. “Okay.” As he pulled back, he saw her eyelids flutter open, but he quickly crawled the short distance to the tree and grabbed the Confessor dress before he had a chance to feel guilty at the thought of asking Kahlan to submit to him.
He shuffled back and slipped the end of one of the sashes beneath her right hand and looped it around her wrist. He looked over at her face as he started tying the first knot, knowing he would never be able to dismiss the image of her laying there, her head tilting to watch him as it rested on a halo of curls.
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Kahlan didn’t know how long she had been running, but the incentive to reach Richard kept her going even though her lungs felt on fire and her feet ached with each step. She had to gather her dress at times so she wouldn’t stumble and she tried to follow the edge of the path wherever possible since the thin areas of grass were more forgiving on her bare feet than the rocks that littered the trail.
The forest took on a disconcerting dimness the deeper she went and she soon reached the narrow part of the track, forcing her to stay in the middle and endure the feel of small stones stabbing into her with every stride. She felt the sharp sting of a branch on her forearm as it clawed its way through her skin when she ran past and she tried to dodge the numerous others that ominously appeared from either side as she continued.
Her mind dismissed the physical pain as it considered what may be happening to Richard. She could feel tears welling in her eyes, making her surroundings morph into an indistinguishable blur of dark colours as she hurtled through the forest. She angrily wiped them away with the back of one of her hands, as though their mere presence was trying to hinder her progress, but each time her hand finished brushing her lower lids, new tears took their place.
She didn’t see the low hanging branch through her misty stare until it was too late, and the wind was knocked from her lungs as her chest crashed into it. She fell backwards from the force, and lay staring at the maze of branches that created the roof of the forest as she sucked in painful breaths. She rested her hand against her chest, tenderly pushing on her ribs to check if anything felt broken, but she was at least grateful that it seemed she would escape with only bruising. She could feel her heart beating rapidly beneath the palm of her hand; she wanted to think it was merely from exertion, but she knew part of it was from fear that she wouldn’t find Richard before he made a terrible mistake.
And that thought made her hoist herself up, take a few cautious breaths until her chest seemed to be able to expand fully once more, and hurry on her way.
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Richard pulled on the end of the sash until the final knot tightened around her left wrist. “It’s not too tight is it, Kahlan?” he questioned, waiting until he saw her shake her head before removing his hand from the knot. His eyes followed the line of the white material as it trailed from the arm he was holding, around the base of the pine tree and back to the knot around her right wrist. She still had enough room to move her hand up to the side of his face, and she ran her fingers over his bottom lip, just barely dipping them inside his mouth before letting them drop to her own, as though tempting him to follow their course.
He slowly bent his head down, watching as her eyes honed in on his lips, and her head lifted towards his. He halted a few inches from her, just out of reach, and gave her a reassuring smile. “Not yet.”
Her head dropped back down as he shuffled down her body until his hands were able to encircle her waist. He felt her hip bones pressing into the sides of his hands as he pulled her towards him, her arms stretching above her head as she slid over the grass. When he saw her arms were secure, he repositioned himself until either knee rested comfortably beside her chest, and he could feel her lower ribs pushing against the inner surface of his thighs each time she took a breath. He felt a tremor pass through her body as he settled down, the bones of her pelvis pressing into his groin.
Richard unhooked the leather that tethered the scabbard to his waist, letting it fall to the ground beside them. He then moved his hands to his belt, allowing his fingers to work automatically so he didn’t need to take his eyes off her. He could see the glimmer in her eyes as he pulled the belt from its loops and she glanced down at the sword, then back to him as he leaned forward, the belt still curled in his hand. He placed each hand beside her head until he towered over her, her pupils dilating as his shadow swept over her.
“Do you really think this is the right thing to do?” He looked down at her with sincerity, urging her to confirm that she truly thought their actions were justified. She nodded vigorously at his statement. He paused for a moment, then slowly shook his head. “Well, you are wrong.”
She didn’t say anything, but her eyes widened in despair.
“An admirable disguise, Shota.” He swept his eyes over the image beneath him, then ducked down until his mouth was beside her ear, whispering as though he were letting her in on a secret. “But you missed a few details.”
Chapter 4 here: http://jane-doh1.livejournal.com/6520.html