Letters from Santa.
Dear Everyone,
Okay, let me start off by saying that I’ve never done this before because, in the past, it hasn’t been an issue. I’ve never had to actually respond to the letters that get sent to me. For all the years I’ve been doing this (delivering presents and whatnot), the process has been fairly simple: Folks write me letters explaining what they want- If you’re good, you get what you ask for. If you’re a dipshit, I find something in your house that looks important, and then I poop on it.
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