(no subject)
I have such a piss poor attitude. I'm more of a prick than ever, and not that I've scared anyone off yet but I'm sooo not in the right state of mind to be making new friends. They're all going to get the wrong idea about me.
I don't even know what it is that made me feel so bitter and feel so pissed off recently. I guess I have a hard time dealing with failures and honestly dealing with things that don't go my way. I bottle things up too, it hasn't been 'til this summer where I've finally started to voice displeasure I feel with people and i'd say 85% of the time I've got at least a few beers in me.
The funny part is I have more motivation to do stuff like schoolwork and errands now that I'm here. I don't know if it's to get my mind away from things or what. I haven't felt this right in awhile, I've only had a few anxiety moments(although they were more than just moments, try 60 to 75 minutes) so far up here. I still wish my health situation was settled it's always something different which also leads me to believe it's just stress and anxiety but ya know there's always that "what if it's not?"
I like my new classes. My new room and roommate is real legit. But something's just off and I really SHOULD be happy but I'm not. I mean generally not. It's not like I've locked myself inside this dorm and decided nothing makes me happy.
I don't even know what it is that made me feel so bitter and feel so pissed off recently. I guess I have a hard time dealing with failures and honestly dealing with things that don't go my way. I bottle things up too, it hasn't been 'til this summer where I've finally started to voice displeasure I feel with people and i'd say 85% of the time I've got at least a few beers in me.
The funny part is I have more motivation to do stuff like schoolwork and errands now that I'm here. I don't know if it's to get my mind away from things or what. I haven't felt this right in awhile, I've only had a few anxiety moments(although they were more than just moments, try 60 to 75 minutes) so far up here. I still wish my health situation was settled it's always something different which also leads me to believe it's just stress and anxiety but ya know there's always that "what if it's not?"
I like my new classes. My new room and roommate is real legit. But something's just off and I really SHOULD be happy but I'm not. I mean generally not. It's not like I've locked myself inside this dorm and decided nothing makes me happy.