Dec 06, 2005 06:49
So as it were a giant radish its heart was pupled to a thick red pulp, twirling in its red fleshy textures to release its color on the world in all its glory. Spread out on a carving board to dry and be sliced into shapes according to the whim of the butcher. To be packaged and sold in the retale stores of evil. Do you wish to be part of this facade? I feel as though this society has nothing to offer me that I havnt glanced, I'll be it with jaded or cynics eyes, for at least enough time to understand, (or thought I understood). I do not see how the perpetuation of what has already come to be and what will continue, maybe it will be changed, maybe it wont be, I accept every outcome. It is ok to me if the earth is blown up by nuclear bombs or if our ecosystem or whats left implodes. I entertain those notions in my darkest times as a kind of joyous occation. I though don't feel the need to exist in the society that buys and sells and sells themselves along with there egos so they can get some kind of "recognition" or maybe to get "laid". My point is to understand the paradox in which I am ever so striving to figure out. I could care less if you like me because I will not put on a mask. I need to understand my path, that is all that concerns me, the distractions which are brought up in thousands of different ways manafest themselves to be most alluring, I could accept that and just kind of dissolve into pleasures like so many, or I could become aware of my nature. I am slowly opening my eye, I would much rather follow my eyes then my sensations. So I am thinking about maybe becoming a monk? I am still unsure if this is my correct way, but dealing with the outside worlds demands is not how I want to live my life. For life is so much more than survival, it is so much more than coping, it is so much more than having "friends". I need to find the path in which I am destined or there really isnt a point to life. Life realized is one step above life lived, well life "lived" as so many "live".
Farewell.