Sylvia Plath
I told myself I would only write in here once a day, but I'm already breaking my own rule. Anyway, I’m reading The Bell Jar right now. I’m only about half way through. I can’t believe I haven’t read this book until now. I think it would have had a major impact on me if I had read it when I was 19, the age of Esther, the main character. She impresses me. I am like her in a lot of ways, but in other ways she is much braver than me. The part where she goes skiing and breaks her leg has stuck in my mind. It reminds me of the first time I went skiing. Like her, I had no clue what I was doing, and like her, a boyfriend coerced me to go up to the top of a scary hill. Unlike her, I did not feel reckless exhilaration as I raced down, out of control. I felt terror. I guess this means I don’t want to kill myself. And unlike her, I didn’t break my leg. I did the smartest thing I could think of, which was to gradually lower myself so that I was actually skidding down the hill on my butt, dragging my poles behind me to slow myself, eventually coming to a stop about a quarter of the way from the bottom. At that point I picked myself up, and glided to the bottom of the hill on my skis, giving my non-observant friends the impression that I had successfully skied all the way down. Yes, it is a metaphor isn’t it.
Anyway, I pity Esther. I don’t know how this book ends yet, but I think things are just going to get worse for her. Thank god the plight of women has improved, at least I think it has. Sometimes I think men like Alan Shore set the women’s movement back 100 years. But other times I’m not sure. Women seem to want to be sexually harassed by him. Did I want that? No. I honestly didn’t, and I think that’s why he never harassed me. Interesting. Was he really that perceptive? Yes, he was. Tara loved the attention, and he knew she would, and that’s why he focused on her. He was a smart guy. Just not my type.
Anyway, I pity Esther. I don’t know how this book ends yet, but I think things are just going to get worse for her. Thank god the plight of women has improved, at least I think it has. Sometimes I think men like Alan Shore set the women’s movement back 100 years. But other times I’m not sure. Women seem to want to be sexually harassed by him. Did I want that? No. I honestly didn’t, and I think that’s why he never harassed me. Interesting. Was he really that perceptive? Yes, he was. Tara loved the attention, and he knew she would, and that’s why he focused on her. He was a smart guy. Just not my type.