Keyners
Funny old place is keynsham. Not a lot going on. Charity shops that kinda thing. Pubs. There's a fair few of those. Last night i met up with my old school friends. Now these are my oldest friends but i don't really have much in common with them. i tried my absolute damndest to stay at an appropriate level of tipsyness. I drank about a million pints of water, a few hundred thousand coffees and only about 5 pints of weak bitter and still, i think i may have been a little too high spirited. Oh sobriety! Why hast thou forsaken me. Christmas seems to be about remembering that my oldest friends and my family really aren't on my wavelength at all... Oh well. Nice bunch all the same.
Did xmas round the girls' house on thursday. That was the bomb! Pressie swapping, mulled wine drinking, then out for a pub meal in a grotty / atmospheric wetherspoons. Grinning from ear to ear i was for the whole evening. If friends was the new family then this would be them. Yaay.
Right, well, mater and pater are cooking dinner, my bro is watching a little britain dvd. I've already blasted them with improv violin from the bedroom so for the next few mins i'll be doing this...
1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Released an album. Various music related things. Vast amounts of therapy!
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Didn't make any last year. Won't be making any this year. Think it's daft cos it belies the existential nature of freedom. Ha ha! I'm a riot!
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My cousin who lives in hull - proper north east working class types my family - is having a baby and she's only 18.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, my housemate dan committed suicide.
5. What countries did you visit?
France (the dordoyne), wales, the czech republic
6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
More confidence.
7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Don't really have any dates that ring significance. I've got a few memories though and a few notches on the bedpost of world-wisdom...
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Dunno, being sacked by a temp agency on the bus home from work (the employers were too yellow) then getting off the bus and putting on a brave face and doing an 'introduction to violin' workshop for some kids minutes later.
9. What was your biggest failure?
You know it's funny, although i think it's fair to say i have suffered from depression and that i have a rather unkind self image and such like things (to be frank, being back in Keyners, i can see why, this is not where i belong), i can't say i've failed in any big way this year. There are things i might've done better, but f**k it i always do the best i can.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No colds. I am superman!
11. What was the best thing you bought?
A computer to do music on!
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Mine! Jo's, Jemimah's, Sam's, Chipper's, Andy's, Dan's (should point out here that Dan was having a really hard time, but he was never less than f**king kind, caring, sweet, patient, gentle to everyone)
There's a lot of love in this room!
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
A couple of friends let me down for gigs. Warranting the phrase, 'i shoulda known my oldest friends would be the first to let me down'. But that's a little bitchy, and besides, i seem to have a bit of a theme running here. Heh heh.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, this computer. God knows, it's not even my money, it belongs to barclaycard.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
I don't get excited enough. I was very pleased though, the other day i though, 'f**k me! I'm a violinist! Ha ha How'd i manage that??' and my world subtly changed for the better.
16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
None, not really, nothing'll remind me of 2004 as i don't really feel that this year has a positive identity of it's own. There's music that'll remind me of things that happened in 2004. Like smells. You know, but dunno what they are until they come on and remind me of things.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. Happier or sadder?
Happier - I have had A LOT of therapy this year! Ha Ha! Also i'm beginning to find my place!
ii. Thinner or fatter?
Thinner. I've stopped going to the gym so my appitite is gone and so are my muscles. Sad to see them go and yet not. Although i might literally have been much sexier and fitter this time last year, i actually feel much sexier now so f**k it.
iii. richer or poorer?
I am really really screwed when it comes to money. At the mo all i'm concerned about is paying the rent. I've gone a bit hand to mouth. But even so, i feel kinda bohemian so bring on the poor!
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Practising instruments. Being confident that i'm any good at musiking.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Prevaricating
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
In keyners with mum dad and bro and meeting up with old friends. Nice bunch, but wouldn't mind being at home.
22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
Split up with my lovely girlfriend.
23. How many one-night stands?
None. In fact i think this is a bit of a myth. I don't think there's many people that do.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
I never watch tv ever. I like radio four...
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No i just ignore people that i don't like.
26. What was the best book you read?
My reading has taken a downward turn this year which is a big regret. The book i'm inclined to say is best is the first circle by alexander solzhenitsyn. not finished it yet but really liking it.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Georgio Ligeti, klezmer, gone in a more classical direction this year and rather pleased so far.
28. What did you want and get?
A swish computer!
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. But haven't seen the incredibles yet and there's still a few days.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 25 and you know i can't remember. F**k! Jemimah and I must've done something but a can't remember what it was. She got me a ticket for the pixies though. Heh heh. I've seen the pixies live!!!
32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Confidence.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
I haven't bought any clothes this year at all... Grunge i suppose.
34. What kept you sane?
Therapy! Finding my own place!
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None. It's just not sexy to fancy celebs cos there's no chance of anything happening so that element of excitement and wonderous possibilities that makes fancying someone fun just isn't there. You can literally but there's no sense in humping a poster.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
It's all a bit much isn't it? It occured to me this year, especially in power-organisations (good work james! Good term!) like government and councils though perhaps in all organisations, that everyone has power but that everyone feels totally impotent. So my manager has authority over me and can make decisions that effect me, but he HAS to do it or his manager is gonna have to disipline him. So he has power but he feels powerless.
if you extrapolate (is that the word??) from this it kinda implies that the whole iraq business is out of control and always was. No one's running the show.
37. Who did you miss?
Jemimah! Dan!
38. Who was the best new person you met?
Chipper, Jen. Met lots of cool people but particularly pleased with these two friendship acquisitions this year...
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
Lots of soundbites - Happiness is a feeling of mild stress. Or at least, the thing about happiness is that it doesn't feel like happiness at all - it's like a summer breeze perhaps, you can't see it or smell it but you can see what it does.
Dunno, i grew up a lot this year. I'm older and wiser.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Haven't thought about this... so tough...
(SORRY DON'T KNOW HOW TO CUT THESE THINGS DOWN. REALLY SOORRY!)
Did xmas round the girls' house on thursday. That was the bomb! Pressie swapping, mulled wine drinking, then out for a pub meal in a grotty / atmospheric wetherspoons. Grinning from ear to ear i was for the whole evening. If friends was the new family then this would be them. Yaay.
Right, well, mater and pater are cooking dinner, my bro is watching a little britain dvd. I've already blasted them with improv violin from the bedroom so for the next few mins i'll be doing this...
1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Released an album. Various music related things. Vast amounts of therapy!
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Didn't make any last year. Won't be making any this year. Think it's daft cos it belies the existential nature of freedom. Ha ha! I'm a riot!
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My cousin who lives in hull - proper north east working class types my family - is having a baby and she's only 18.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, my housemate dan committed suicide.
5. What countries did you visit?
France (the dordoyne), wales, the czech republic
6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
More confidence.
7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Don't really have any dates that ring significance. I've got a few memories though and a few notches on the bedpost of world-wisdom...
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Dunno, being sacked by a temp agency on the bus home from work (the employers were too yellow) then getting off the bus and putting on a brave face and doing an 'introduction to violin' workshop for some kids minutes later.
9. What was your biggest failure?
You know it's funny, although i think it's fair to say i have suffered from depression and that i have a rather unkind self image and such like things (to be frank, being back in Keyners, i can see why, this is not where i belong), i can't say i've failed in any big way this year. There are things i might've done better, but f**k it i always do the best i can.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No colds. I am superman!
11. What was the best thing you bought?
A computer to do music on!
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Mine! Jo's, Jemimah's, Sam's, Chipper's, Andy's, Dan's (should point out here that Dan was having a really hard time, but he was never less than f**king kind, caring, sweet, patient, gentle to everyone)
There's a lot of love in this room!
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
A couple of friends let me down for gigs. Warranting the phrase, 'i shoulda known my oldest friends would be the first to let me down'. But that's a little bitchy, and besides, i seem to have a bit of a theme running here. Heh heh.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, this computer. God knows, it's not even my money, it belongs to barclaycard.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
I don't get excited enough. I was very pleased though, the other day i though, 'f**k me! I'm a violinist! Ha ha How'd i manage that??' and my world subtly changed for the better.
16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
None, not really, nothing'll remind me of 2004 as i don't really feel that this year has a positive identity of it's own. There's music that'll remind me of things that happened in 2004. Like smells. You know, but dunno what they are until they come on and remind me of things.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. Happier or sadder?
Happier - I have had A LOT of therapy this year! Ha Ha! Also i'm beginning to find my place!
ii. Thinner or fatter?
Thinner. I've stopped going to the gym so my appitite is gone and so are my muscles. Sad to see them go and yet not. Although i might literally have been much sexier and fitter this time last year, i actually feel much sexier now so f**k it.
iii. richer or poorer?
I am really really screwed when it comes to money. At the mo all i'm concerned about is paying the rent. I've gone a bit hand to mouth. But even so, i feel kinda bohemian so bring on the poor!
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Practising instruments. Being confident that i'm any good at musiking.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Prevaricating
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
In keyners with mum dad and bro and meeting up with old friends. Nice bunch, but wouldn't mind being at home.
22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
Split up with my lovely girlfriend.
23. How many one-night stands?
None. In fact i think this is a bit of a myth. I don't think there's many people that do.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
I never watch tv ever. I like radio four...
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No i just ignore people that i don't like.
26. What was the best book you read?
My reading has taken a downward turn this year which is a big regret. The book i'm inclined to say is best is the first circle by alexander solzhenitsyn. not finished it yet but really liking it.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Georgio Ligeti, klezmer, gone in a more classical direction this year and rather pleased so far.
28. What did you want and get?
A swish computer!
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. But haven't seen the incredibles yet and there's still a few days.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 25 and you know i can't remember. F**k! Jemimah and I must've done something but a can't remember what it was. She got me a ticket for the pixies though. Heh heh. I've seen the pixies live!!!
32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Confidence.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
I haven't bought any clothes this year at all... Grunge i suppose.
34. What kept you sane?
Therapy! Finding my own place!
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None. It's just not sexy to fancy celebs cos there's no chance of anything happening so that element of excitement and wonderous possibilities that makes fancying someone fun just isn't there. You can literally but there's no sense in humping a poster.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
It's all a bit much isn't it? It occured to me this year, especially in power-organisations (good work james! Good term!) like government and councils though perhaps in all organisations, that everyone has power but that everyone feels totally impotent. So my manager has authority over me and can make decisions that effect me, but he HAS to do it or his manager is gonna have to disipline him. So he has power but he feels powerless.
if you extrapolate (is that the word??) from this it kinda implies that the whole iraq business is out of control and always was. No one's running the show.
37. Who did you miss?
Jemimah! Dan!
38. Who was the best new person you met?
Chipper, Jen. Met lots of cool people but particularly pleased with these two friendship acquisitions this year...
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
Lots of soundbites - Happiness is a feeling of mild stress. Or at least, the thing about happiness is that it doesn't feel like happiness at all - it's like a summer breeze perhaps, you can't see it or smell it but you can see what it does.
Dunno, i grew up a lot this year. I'm older and wiser.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Haven't thought about this... so tough...
(SORRY DON'T KNOW HOW TO CUT THESE THINGS DOWN. REALLY SOORRY!)