Hmmmm
All this college stress has gone to my head, and perhaps has been a heavier burden on me then I thought it might be. My physics still lays sprawled on upon my floor yet to be completed, with my math crumpled up beside it. With much of my word in such a state of choas, I barely scrape by with the grades I would deam adequet.
Lately, my school has not been the only thing to fudge in my life. I've been possibly like this for some time now, detroying, questiong, things I really shouldn't. I question almost all of your guy's commitment to me as a friend, at least to a certain degree. There are very few exeptions. So when it comes push to shove, I don't really know ho wmany of you I trust. Not because I have fair reason not to trust, but rather because I find reasons not too, that perhaps aren't even really there. This is defintly not the fairest of techniques, and I become quick to anger when any of my expectations in a friend are not met.
As I hang around with him or her, this crowd or that crowd, I find myself being expected to acted in such a manner. True all of these manners are a key part of my personality, but I often get restricted to a limited part of my personlity around certain groups. This defintly frusterates me, and I often try to escape it. This results in me trying to act like myself, which simple doesn't work. However, If I do nto attempt this I often get shut into one side of my personlity around certain people, which is perhaps worse. being stuck around people, part of me wants to be there, part of me just wants wants to go out and sit on a bench, by myself, were I'm me, and that's all there is too it. No people to scure my personlity, no "friends" to guide my next move. Not to say that I'm acting like someone who I'm not around specific people, but rather, I'm only showing them a specific part of me. I get then impression that after awhile, they resue to see any other part of me, wether I show it to them or not.
My hhands are cold, my stomach grumples with its hunger, and I try to wonder why I hang out with people, when perhaps I should spend this time retrospecting at myself. Finding who I really am. I realize this is almsot a unanswerable question, for most people don't really know who they are, and no one can tell you who you are.
Friends are doubftul, yet proment in my heart. I debate wether to keep the close, or hide in thier shadows. I'm a needy friend to say the least, and despite your efforts, it'll be hard for me not to be disappointed.
Lately, my school has not been the only thing to fudge in my life. I've been possibly like this for some time now, detroying, questiong, things I really shouldn't. I question almost all of your guy's commitment to me as a friend, at least to a certain degree. There are very few exeptions. So when it comes push to shove, I don't really know ho wmany of you I trust. Not because I have fair reason not to trust, but rather because I find reasons not too, that perhaps aren't even really there. This is defintly not the fairest of techniques, and I become quick to anger when any of my expectations in a friend are not met.
As I hang around with him or her, this crowd or that crowd, I find myself being expected to acted in such a manner. True all of these manners are a key part of my personality, but I often get restricted to a limited part of my personlity around certain groups. This defintly frusterates me, and I often try to escape it. This results in me trying to act like myself, which simple doesn't work. However, If I do nto attempt this I often get shut into one side of my personlity around certain people, which is perhaps worse. being stuck around people, part of me wants to be there, part of me just wants wants to go out and sit on a bench, by myself, were I'm me, and that's all there is too it. No people to scure my personlity, no "friends" to guide my next move. Not to say that I'm acting like someone who I'm not around specific people, but rather, I'm only showing them a specific part of me. I get then impression that after awhile, they resue to see any other part of me, wether I show it to them or not.
My hhands are cold, my stomach grumples with its hunger, and I try to wonder why I hang out with people, when perhaps I should spend this time retrospecting at myself. Finding who I really am. I realize this is almsot a unanswerable question, for most people don't really know who they are, and no one can tell you who you are.
Friends are doubftul, yet proment in my heart. I debate wether to keep the close, or hide in thier shadows. I'm a needy friend to say the least, and despite your efforts, it'll be hard for me not to be disappointed.