Fic: But Didn't Know He Wanted
Title: But Didn't Know He Wanted
Author: acidquill
Pairing: James/Lily
Rating: PG
Challenge: 94. James gen; character study centered on the approaching birth of Harry -- his hopes, fears, apprehensions, ideas about fatherhood, etc.
Summary: James doesn't know anything about babies, but he's going to learn.
Warnings: none
Word Count: 1000
A/N: A 10 set of drabbles which caused me no end of trouble.
But Didn't Know He Wanted
1.
He never expects what Lily tells him.
“We’re having a baby.”
James thinks maybe he heard wrong. He shakes his head and wonders if she slipped something in his tea.
“What?”
Lily looks at him and he’s never, ever, seen her look so spooked; that’s just not the way Lily works. She looks like she’s closer to tears than smiling --
“We’re having a baby.”
James is out of the chair before he knows it. He hugs her close to his chest and kisses the top of her head. He smiles against his hair.
“No worries Lils. It’ll be fine.”
2.
The two of them read all the time now. There are mountains of books beside the bed and the chairs in the kitchen hold the overflow. James wants to cover Baby 101; Lily wants to know what to expect. James thinks it’s funny, he never studied like this in school. Lily laughs and tells him maybe he just needed the right motivation.
James kisses her. He rests his head on her lap and his hand on her stomach. Lily runs her fingers through his hair, smile gentle and soft. James imagines he can already feel the baby under his hand.
3.
They decide not to get the gender-reveal spell done. Of course it’s not decided until Lily’s already halfway through her check-up. Then she just looks at him and grins,
“It’ll be better if it’s a surprise.”
James grins back because that’s exactly something he expects Lily to say. The mediwitch looks slightly annoyed, but the two of them don’t pay her any attention. As soon as Lily’s finished James takes her out to lunch in London and afterwards they buy two sets of everything in the baby department at Gladrags -- one set in yellow and the other in green.
4.
James realises he’s going to be a father on a morning that’s entirely ordinary. He wakes up and Lily is standing by the window, early sun making her glow around the edges. She hums quietly and her hand is resting on her stomach -- the baby’s been growing like crazy and Lily says he’s sure to be a beater the way he kicks. James just lies there and looks, because this is Lily. She’s having his baby. He’s going to be a dad.
The mediwitch said so, the pregnancy spell said so, Lily said so. But now James gets it.
5.
Lily signs them up for childbirth classes. James goes and feels slightly stupid holding a doll and pretending it’s a real baby. Apparently Lily feels it more than him because they only go that one time. He doesn’t ask her why; he already knows the look she’ll give him. He can almost see her mouth turning up at the corners and the way she’ll say, Jamie, I never really liked dolls. We’ll do this our own way.
James smiles and buys her a shirt that says Baby on Board. She smacks him but he can tell she doesn’t mean it.
6.
James’ dad made it look so easy -- smiles and tickets to the World Cup and father-son lunches together on Tuesdays. He taught James to whistle and how to tie his shoes. He taught James to stand up for what he believed in and then made sure James knew what kinds of things were worth believing. James spends his time trying to remember every lesson. His dad is gone, but James wants to make sure his baby -- his son, Lily assures him -- has the best. James wants everything to be perfect, or as close as he can get.
7.
He wonders what the baby will look like -- though Sirius informs him all babies resemble a Muggle named Churchill -- James still wonders. There’s a flutter in his stomach every time he thinks of tiny little hands and big green eyes. He’s absolutely sure that it will be Lily’s eyes looking up at him from that blanket, though he can’t say why. Lily laughs,
“My eyes, your hair.”
She proclaims the baby a boy, and furthermore, to keep calling him ‘the baby’ is rude. They start calling him Harry and Lily apologises for ruining the surprise.
James doesn’t mind.
8.
When she’s eight months along, Lily gets put on bed rest. She hates it and doesn’t follow it half of the time. When she does, James brings her flowers and runs himself ragged making sure she has everything she needs. He worries and frets and wonders how he’s supposed to pull off this father thing anyway.
Lily catches his sleeve and pulls him down beside her.
“Don’t worry so much Jamie, it’s fine. Come and keep me company.”
She falls asleep with her head on James’ chest; her hand covering his over the spot where the baby kicks the most.
9.
James knows he should be more worried. The threat of the Dark Lord and Death Eaters hang over them like a thunderstorm ready to break and the baby isn‘t even here yet.
At night he has time to think about it. But he doesn’t worry about nightmares coming to steal them away, because he’s right there with his arms around Lily, the baby. His family. For right now he can keep them both safe. He’ll deal with the morning when it comes and take things one step at a time.
But he holds Lily just a little bit tighter anyway.
10.
Lily says the baby will be along any day now. James spends his time practicing how fast he can get her bag and her into the Floo. Not that he really needs it, but it makes Lily laugh.
The nursery’s still not painted, but Lily’s been looking at it speculatively all week. James isn‘t surprised when she comes to him with a brush dipped in sunny yellow paint and points him towards the nursery door. He finishes it in a few hours and when he comes out covered in paint drips, Lily is waiting by the Floo with her bag.
Author: acidquill
Pairing: James/Lily
Rating: PG
Challenge: 94. James gen; character study centered on the approaching birth of Harry -- his hopes, fears, apprehensions, ideas about fatherhood, etc.
Summary: James doesn't know anything about babies, but he's going to learn.
Warnings: none
Word Count: 1000
A/N: A 10 set of drabbles which caused me no end of trouble.
But Didn't Know He Wanted
1.
He never expects what Lily tells him.
“We’re having a baby.”
James thinks maybe he heard wrong. He shakes his head and wonders if she slipped something in his tea.
“What?”
Lily looks at him and he’s never, ever, seen her look so spooked; that’s just not the way Lily works. She looks like she’s closer to tears than smiling --
“We’re having a baby.”
James is out of the chair before he knows it. He hugs her close to his chest and kisses the top of her head. He smiles against his hair.
“No worries Lils. It’ll be fine.”
2.
The two of them read all the time now. There are mountains of books beside the bed and the chairs in the kitchen hold the overflow. James wants to cover Baby 101; Lily wants to know what to expect. James thinks it’s funny, he never studied like this in school. Lily laughs and tells him maybe he just needed the right motivation.
James kisses her. He rests his head on her lap and his hand on her stomach. Lily runs her fingers through his hair, smile gentle and soft. James imagines he can already feel the baby under his hand.
3.
They decide not to get the gender-reveal spell done. Of course it’s not decided until Lily’s already halfway through her check-up. Then she just looks at him and grins,
“It’ll be better if it’s a surprise.”
James grins back because that’s exactly something he expects Lily to say. The mediwitch looks slightly annoyed, but the two of them don’t pay her any attention. As soon as Lily’s finished James takes her out to lunch in London and afterwards they buy two sets of everything in the baby department at Gladrags -- one set in yellow and the other in green.
4.
James realises he’s going to be a father on a morning that’s entirely ordinary. He wakes up and Lily is standing by the window, early sun making her glow around the edges. She hums quietly and her hand is resting on her stomach -- the baby’s been growing like crazy and Lily says he’s sure to be a beater the way he kicks. James just lies there and looks, because this is Lily. She’s having his baby. He’s going to be a dad.
The mediwitch said so, the pregnancy spell said so, Lily said so. But now James gets it.
5.
Lily signs them up for childbirth classes. James goes and feels slightly stupid holding a doll and pretending it’s a real baby. Apparently Lily feels it more than him because they only go that one time. He doesn’t ask her why; he already knows the look she’ll give him. He can almost see her mouth turning up at the corners and the way she’ll say, Jamie, I never really liked dolls. We’ll do this our own way.
James smiles and buys her a shirt that says Baby on Board. She smacks him but he can tell she doesn’t mean it.
6.
James’ dad made it look so easy -- smiles and tickets to the World Cup and father-son lunches together on Tuesdays. He taught James to whistle and how to tie his shoes. He taught James to stand up for what he believed in and then made sure James knew what kinds of things were worth believing. James spends his time trying to remember every lesson. His dad is gone, but James wants to make sure his baby -- his son, Lily assures him -- has the best. James wants everything to be perfect, or as close as he can get.
7.
He wonders what the baby will look like -- though Sirius informs him all babies resemble a Muggle named Churchill -- James still wonders. There’s a flutter in his stomach every time he thinks of tiny little hands and big green eyes. He’s absolutely sure that it will be Lily’s eyes looking up at him from that blanket, though he can’t say why. Lily laughs,
“My eyes, your hair.”
She proclaims the baby a boy, and furthermore, to keep calling him ‘the baby’ is rude. They start calling him Harry and Lily apologises for ruining the surprise.
James doesn’t mind.
8.
When she’s eight months along, Lily gets put on bed rest. She hates it and doesn’t follow it half of the time. When she does, James brings her flowers and runs himself ragged making sure she has everything she needs. He worries and frets and wonders how he’s supposed to pull off this father thing anyway.
Lily catches his sleeve and pulls him down beside her.
“Don’t worry so much Jamie, it’s fine. Come and keep me company.”
She falls asleep with her head on James’ chest; her hand covering his over the spot where the baby kicks the most.
9.
James knows he should be more worried. The threat of the Dark Lord and Death Eaters hang over them like a thunderstorm ready to break and the baby isn‘t even here yet.
At night he has time to think about it. But he doesn’t worry about nightmares coming to steal them away, because he’s right there with his arms around Lily, the baby. His family. For right now he can keep them both safe. He’ll deal with the morning when it comes and take things one step at a time.
But he holds Lily just a little bit tighter anyway.
10.
Lily says the baby will be along any day now. James spends his time practicing how fast he can get her bag and her into the Floo. Not that he really needs it, but it makes Lily laugh.
The nursery’s still not painted, but Lily’s been looking at it speculatively all week. James isn‘t surprised when she comes to him with a brush dipped in sunny yellow paint and points him towards the nursery door. He finishes it in a few hours and when he comes out covered in paint drips, Lily is waiting by the Floo with her bag.