(no subject)
shiiiiiiiiiiiiitttty day. blargh
i'm working on my final line in school, and i'm really getting sick of all the hoops we have to jump through to get marks. It's so redundant. I'm so glad I only have 6 more weeks, and then I never have to come back. I'm so discouraged, I just want to walk away, but i know how stupid that would be. We have to have things done in a stupid order that makes no sense...
Our final fashion show is aug 14th. I'm less excited than i once was.
I need a song, because the one i wanted was rejected because it's a "family" show and the lyrics were inappropriate. LAMe.
on another front,
I came out to my parents (in january) for real this time (attempted once when i was 14)
they freaked out. I won't go into detail as to what was said, but i received innumerable crying phone calls, and a 5 page letter, pointing out all my shortcomings and failures. I've been through a roller coasted of emotions, but most things have settled inside me, and now i'm just kind of cold. I don't value any advice i receive from them, and looking back, realized that most of what they taught and told me (aside from practical skills and a few life lessons) was incorrect or useless. I've learned more from watching them and doing the opposite, than from imitating. I'm really disappointed with their reaction, but i will give them the benefit of the doubt, and say that they will come around. I don't think i'm asking too much to expect that me and my partner be treated with basic human dignity, but that's out of their realm. To them, my value as a person has dropped because i don't love cock.
This whole thing has taught me to be more selective about where i place my trust, and receive advice from. It's taught me that you don't owe people anything, least of all respect, until they earn it. I used to be a total pack rat, and keep all kinds of mementos from my past, but then i realized that the things i was clinging to were reminders of a past I would never ever want to re-live...so i threw them all out. All the furniture my parents gave me is pretty much gone, along with gifts, cards, letters, photos. I've moved twice 6 months, and I got sick of carrying around box after box of useless crap, so i just started pitching stuff as i moved and packed and unpacked, and it's such a good feeling. THere is vastly less clutter, and i don't open boxes of bad memories when i'm looking for kitchen appliances or sewing stuff.
seems like i just came here to bitch, i know, but this is just the scoop, and the shit tastic ness of today just compounded it.
On the bright side, I have a great partner, whom I share a nice apartment with. We have sexy bed sheets, and I have a studio. We have adorable pets, and I got 4 cute goldfish for my birthday. They are fancy ones (orandas and ryukins) and their names are helmut, ernie, timmie and gerald. I love them. We also have kitties, simon and tio, and jim, a bearded dragon. These are the good things. There are more, but that's the synopsis.
i'm working on my final line in school, and i'm really getting sick of all the hoops we have to jump through to get marks. It's so redundant. I'm so glad I only have 6 more weeks, and then I never have to come back. I'm so discouraged, I just want to walk away, but i know how stupid that would be. We have to have things done in a stupid order that makes no sense...
Our final fashion show is aug 14th. I'm less excited than i once was.
I need a song, because the one i wanted was rejected because it's a "family" show and the lyrics were inappropriate. LAMe.
on another front,
I came out to my parents (in january) for real this time (attempted once when i was 14)
they freaked out. I won't go into detail as to what was said, but i received innumerable crying phone calls, and a 5 page letter, pointing out all my shortcomings and failures. I've been through a roller coasted of emotions, but most things have settled inside me, and now i'm just kind of cold. I don't value any advice i receive from them, and looking back, realized that most of what they taught and told me (aside from practical skills and a few life lessons) was incorrect or useless. I've learned more from watching them and doing the opposite, than from imitating. I'm really disappointed with their reaction, but i will give them the benefit of the doubt, and say that they will come around. I don't think i'm asking too much to expect that me and my partner be treated with basic human dignity, but that's out of their realm. To them, my value as a person has dropped because i don't love cock.
This whole thing has taught me to be more selective about where i place my trust, and receive advice from. It's taught me that you don't owe people anything, least of all respect, until they earn it. I used to be a total pack rat, and keep all kinds of mementos from my past, but then i realized that the things i was clinging to were reminders of a past I would never ever want to re-live...so i threw them all out. All the furniture my parents gave me is pretty much gone, along with gifts, cards, letters, photos. I've moved twice 6 months, and I got sick of carrying around box after box of useless crap, so i just started pitching stuff as i moved and packed and unpacked, and it's such a good feeling. THere is vastly less clutter, and i don't open boxes of bad memories when i'm looking for kitchen appliances or sewing stuff.
seems like i just came here to bitch, i know, but this is just the scoop, and the shit tastic ness of today just compounded it.
On the bright side, I have a great partner, whom I share a nice apartment with. We have sexy bed sheets, and I have a studio. We have adorable pets, and I got 4 cute goldfish for my birthday. They are fancy ones (orandas and ryukins) and their names are helmut, ernie, timmie and gerald. I love them. We also have kitties, simon and tio, and jim, a bearded dragon. These are the good things. There are more, but that's the synopsis.