Mostly about my boy and stuff.
Because I don't much want to dwell in Job any longer - at least, not for the next few minutes.
So, as I've been working on this paper, I've been watching various movies that I know and love very well: Anne of Green Gables (the sequel, as sadly I don't have the first one on DVD), Singin' in the Rain, Hello Dolly (ok I don't know that one AS well but I do love it, in great part thanks to Wall-E) - next on the list is Pride and Prejudice, though I haven't discovered yet whether I'm going to finish it or whether I'll make it to bed tonight. I watch these movies when I'm working on papers because they're movies I don't have to watch, since I know them so well. They just run pleasantly on in the background and I can turn my attention to them when something comes on I particularly love.
And I talked to Troy today (surprise, surprise, I talk to him every day. Can't fall asleep if I haven't heard from my boy!) - he will likely be disappointed in me for taking the time to write this instead of finishing my homework but I can't help it, my brain is spinning and I just HAVE to get this out of my system, and perhaps when he reads it he won't be so mad. Well, anyway, he's absolutely right. I am lazy and for whatever reason I procrastinate the dickens out of everything because well I don't want to, and it's a horrible quality to have and something I really should work on, and I AM, I promise, in fact I even started my Job paper early even though apparently it didn't help because here I am... well anyway, I don't deserve someone as patient with me as he is, and in all honesty I feel like such a sham sometimes because I wonder if I'll ever be the kind of woman he really does deserve.
But that's not the point. My brain does things when I've been dwelling in one subject for such a long time. And by "things" I mean it wanders something dreadful. No wonder I have so much trouble finishing things before the zero hour.
ANYWAY. The point is, all those movies, and all those favorite stories that have thrilled my dreamer's heart for such a long time, they still hold my heart and my dreams. I still thrill to the core at them. And I'm so lucky because now the parts I only dreamt of are happening in my life, and it's because of Troy, and it's ways I never thought they would. Because, you know, I fought him for such a long time, and I was so silly about it, but then, how could I not? No matter that I always told myself that I would not be so foolish as to NOT know my dearest love when I met him. No matter that I always thought that Anne was a fool to resist Gilbert for so long, that Elizabeth ridiculous for persisting in her hatred of Darcy, that Margaret was just plain blind not to see what a catch Mr. Thornton was. And here I was just as blind as any of them. And how could I not be? How could my story go any differently? I suppose it wouldn't have been half as exciting as it was if I'd just been smart about it. But watching those stories just makes me even happier now, because they are not tainted with that bittersweet sting of longing for the same in my own life. I have it, and I can't let it get away from me. Because I have my Gilbert, my Darcy, my Thornton... well I suppose he oughtn't to be a Romeo or I'll never get my happy ending, but yannow.
Senseless ramblings. I know. But I love my boy and I feel bad for not being the kind of girl he deserves. So I'm going to go back to my paper now that my head is cleared of all this rubble that was rumbling around in it and I can perhaps stomach Job for one more night. And tomorrow I'm going to stop by Wal-Mart on my way home, and I'm calling the dealership. And maybe I'll even make it to get plates, though that might be a little bit ambitious since I have to get to the post office, too.
Yep. Because (and this is a movie I don't love as well as you might think I should): Tomorra, is another day!
So, as I've been working on this paper, I've been watching various movies that I know and love very well: Anne of Green Gables (the sequel, as sadly I don't have the first one on DVD), Singin' in the Rain, Hello Dolly (ok I don't know that one AS well but I do love it, in great part thanks to Wall-E) - next on the list is Pride and Prejudice, though I haven't discovered yet whether I'm going to finish it or whether I'll make it to bed tonight. I watch these movies when I'm working on papers because they're movies I don't have to watch, since I know them so well. They just run pleasantly on in the background and I can turn my attention to them when something comes on I particularly love.
And I talked to Troy today (surprise, surprise, I talk to him every day. Can't fall asleep if I haven't heard from my boy!) - he will likely be disappointed in me for taking the time to write this instead of finishing my homework but I can't help it, my brain is spinning and I just HAVE to get this out of my system, and perhaps when he reads it he won't be so mad. Well, anyway, he's absolutely right. I am lazy and for whatever reason I procrastinate the dickens out of everything because well I don't want to, and it's a horrible quality to have and something I really should work on, and I AM, I promise, in fact I even started my Job paper early even though apparently it didn't help because here I am... well anyway, I don't deserve someone as patient with me as he is, and in all honesty I feel like such a sham sometimes because I wonder if I'll ever be the kind of woman he really does deserve.
But that's not the point. My brain does things when I've been dwelling in one subject for such a long time. And by "things" I mean it wanders something dreadful. No wonder I have so much trouble finishing things before the zero hour.
ANYWAY. The point is, all those movies, and all those favorite stories that have thrilled my dreamer's heart for such a long time, they still hold my heart and my dreams. I still thrill to the core at them. And I'm so lucky because now the parts I only dreamt of are happening in my life, and it's because of Troy, and it's ways I never thought they would. Because, you know, I fought him for such a long time, and I was so silly about it, but then, how could I not? No matter that I always told myself that I would not be so foolish as to NOT know my dearest love when I met him. No matter that I always thought that Anne was a fool to resist Gilbert for so long, that Elizabeth ridiculous for persisting in her hatred of Darcy, that Margaret was just plain blind not to see what a catch Mr. Thornton was. And here I was just as blind as any of them. And how could I not be? How could my story go any differently? I suppose it wouldn't have been half as exciting as it was if I'd just been smart about it. But watching those stories just makes me even happier now, because they are not tainted with that bittersweet sting of longing for the same in my own life. I have it, and I can't let it get away from me. Because I have my Gilbert, my Darcy, my Thornton... well I suppose he oughtn't to be a Romeo or I'll never get my happy ending, but yannow.
Senseless ramblings. I know. But I love my boy and I feel bad for not being the kind of girl he deserves. So I'm going to go back to my paper now that my head is cleared of all this rubble that was rumbling around in it and I can perhaps stomach Job for one more night. And tomorrow I'm going to stop by Wal-Mart on my way home, and I'm calling the dealership. And maybe I'll even make it to get plates, though that might be a little bit ambitious since I have to get to the post office, too.
Yep. Because (and this is a movie I don't love as well as you might think I should): Tomorra, is another day!