This has no redeeming qualities whatsoever
I, um...I don't know how this happened. That's a lie, I do:
jaina:dude, the dorkiest fic in the world would be one where Ichigo has been freed of his hollow, but only because it has a body of its own now, but because it has no job or education and looks like him, they and Rukia have to live as roommates. Like a really bad sitcom.
jaina:People keep thinking Aichi is Ichigo and he's just really sickly and pale
aynos:Hee hee!
jaina:He's like...uh...he's my cousin, we just look alike.
raynos:"Dude, what happened to you today? You look drained!"
jaina:Rare albino disorder.
raynos:XDXDXD ;)
raynos:HA HA
raynos:Aichi muscling in on the wedding night
raynos:"CAN I KISS THE BRIDE?"
jaina:SNORT
jaina:"NO GO AWAY"
raynos:Rukia: *doesn't care*
There was something to be said for a normal life, Ichigo mused as he dozed in bed, now that all this “throw open the gates of heaven” and “destroy barriers between shinigami and hollow” nonsense was done with. A nice place to live, a nice medical career-well, when he finished school in a couple years-a nice girl to wake up to in the morning. Yes, a normal life had a lot going for it.
“Ichigo!” Rukia stuck her head in the room, looking furious. “Did you throw my tabi socks in with the colored wash again! Now I have to fight hollows with pink socks, you idiot! They’ll laugh themselves to death!”
“Ne, partner, wake up!” His hollow leaned in from the other direction. “It’s time for breakfast and I’m not cooking unless you want me to kill the kitchen again.”
Ichigo groaned. Yeah, there was a lot to be said for a normal life. Too bad he’d never fuckin’ find one.
It had all started during that disastrous final battle with Aizen. Things had gone well for their side, all things considered. They hadn’t lost that many, and Urahara’s secret device (and he ALWAYS had a secret device somewhere, how the hell did he come up with them?) for splitting the powers of Aizen’s army of hollow/shinigami creatures had done its job. Unfortunately, even with bankai, Ichigo had been just a hair too slow and been caught up in the wave of power.
He was probably lucky, considering. The arrancar had been so fused with their dual natures that they had simply exploded into dust motes. When the light died down, Ichigo lay on the ground, still intact-and right beside him lay his hollow, blinking in the sunshine.
He should’ve killed the bastard right then, once and for all, but he’d been too dazed. Failing that, one of the several HUNDRED shinigami in the area should’ve at least tried, but everyone had been busy with something or just busy gawping like fish and he’d just kept being alive.
Someone still could’ve killed him later, but no, someone had said that would be unethical. Ichigo had sworn a blue streak at that, pointing out that Soul Society had had no problem executing Rukia on the flimsiest of charges but they had said yes, wasn’t that a reason to change? And he…it…the thing wasn’t ACTUALLY a hollow now. Well, it kind of was, but then again, it didn’t have a mask or a hole, and it didn’t go around eating people as long as they gave it real food, and it DID have a zanpakutou, and now that it didn’t have to fight with Ichigo for dominance it was surprisingly easy to get along with. Matsumoto had even taken it out drinking one night before the clean-up ended and she went back to Soul Society and declared it a fun bar buddy.
Things had just sort of happened in a way Ichigo didn’t understand and he’d ended up with the hollow-or, as his father put it, a new brother, and he didn’t want to KNOW how Pops could deal with it so easily. And he’d just had no choice but to DEAL with it whether he liked it or not.
He’d hoped to escape the madness of it when he went to school, but there had been that other oh-so-pleasant surprise-if Ichigo and the thing (who refused to choose a consistent name to go by) got too far apart from each other for too long, the thing started to…fade. Ichigo wouldn’t have given a shit except when it happened, it tended to trigger migraines in his own head. No one was sure if that meant the hollow would end up back in Ichigo’s world or if they’d both just die, but Ichigo was not real enthusiastic about either possibility.
And then there was Rukia. After the war she’d been given back her old position as Karakura’s shinigami plus Ichigo’s official contact with Soul Society plus the hollow’s minder, to make sure it didn’t start eating souls after all. It had only been natural for them to get close, and eventually it had only been natural for Ichigo to propose and for Rukia to say yes. This he was happy about. The part where his hollow came bouncing in immediately after Rukia had put on the ring and asked if this meant they could share one big bed now-“After all, partner, I’m still you”-that part, he wasn’t thrilled about.
Fuck ethics. It wasn’t like the thing did anything to earn its keep. While Ichigo worked his ass off studying to be a doctor and killing hollows with Rukia on the side, the thing did shit-all as far as he could tell. It refused to kill go out and kill hollows on Ichigo’s say-so, claiming religious beliefs. As an alternative, he’d gotten a gigai from Urahara and worked a variety of odd-jobs. Bartender, waiter, stripper-none of them had lasted long, and most of them had resulted in at least one person Ichigo knew asking why he’d gotten so pale and sickly. Ichigo had a sneaking suspicion where the hollow was on other nights it came home late, considering how many times Rukia-who maintained a covert sort of housefiancee role in public, despite the fact that she didn’t do a damn bit of cleaning-had been pulled aside by well-meaning people asking if she knew her boyfriend was hitting on other women at the bars.
Oh yeah. It was one big happy family.
Yeah, I don't know.
jaina:dude, the dorkiest fic in the world would be one where Ichigo has been freed of his hollow, but only because it has a body of its own now, but because it has no job or education and looks like him, they and Rukia have to live as roommates. Like a really bad sitcom.
jaina:People keep thinking Aichi is Ichigo and he's just really sickly and pale
aynos:Hee hee!
jaina:He's like...uh...he's my cousin, we just look alike.
raynos:"Dude, what happened to you today? You look drained!"
jaina:Rare albino disorder.
raynos:XDXDXD ;)
raynos:HA HA
raynos:Aichi muscling in on the wedding night
raynos:"CAN I KISS THE BRIDE?"
jaina:SNORT
jaina:"NO GO AWAY"
raynos:Rukia: *doesn't care*
There was something to be said for a normal life, Ichigo mused as he dozed in bed, now that all this “throw open the gates of heaven” and “destroy barriers between shinigami and hollow” nonsense was done with. A nice place to live, a nice medical career-well, when he finished school in a couple years-a nice girl to wake up to in the morning. Yes, a normal life had a lot going for it.
“Ichigo!” Rukia stuck her head in the room, looking furious. “Did you throw my tabi socks in with the colored wash again! Now I have to fight hollows with pink socks, you idiot! They’ll laugh themselves to death!”
“Ne, partner, wake up!” His hollow leaned in from the other direction. “It’s time for breakfast and I’m not cooking unless you want me to kill the kitchen again.”
Ichigo groaned. Yeah, there was a lot to be said for a normal life. Too bad he’d never fuckin’ find one.
It had all started during that disastrous final battle with Aizen. Things had gone well for their side, all things considered. They hadn’t lost that many, and Urahara’s secret device (and he ALWAYS had a secret device somewhere, how the hell did he come up with them?) for splitting the powers of Aizen’s army of hollow/shinigami creatures had done its job. Unfortunately, even with bankai, Ichigo had been just a hair too slow and been caught up in the wave of power.
He was probably lucky, considering. The arrancar had been so fused with their dual natures that they had simply exploded into dust motes. When the light died down, Ichigo lay on the ground, still intact-and right beside him lay his hollow, blinking in the sunshine.
He should’ve killed the bastard right then, once and for all, but he’d been too dazed. Failing that, one of the several HUNDRED shinigami in the area should’ve at least tried, but everyone had been busy with something or just busy gawping like fish and he’d just kept being alive.
Someone still could’ve killed him later, but no, someone had said that would be unethical. Ichigo had sworn a blue streak at that, pointing out that Soul Society had had no problem executing Rukia on the flimsiest of charges but they had said yes, wasn’t that a reason to change? And he…it…the thing wasn’t ACTUALLY a hollow now. Well, it kind of was, but then again, it didn’t have a mask or a hole, and it didn’t go around eating people as long as they gave it real food, and it DID have a zanpakutou, and now that it didn’t have to fight with Ichigo for dominance it was surprisingly easy to get along with. Matsumoto had even taken it out drinking one night before the clean-up ended and she went back to Soul Society and declared it a fun bar buddy.
Things had just sort of happened in a way Ichigo didn’t understand and he’d ended up with the hollow-or, as his father put it, a new brother, and he didn’t want to KNOW how Pops could deal with it so easily. And he’d just had no choice but to DEAL with it whether he liked it or not.
He’d hoped to escape the madness of it when he went to school, but there had been that other oh-so-pleasant surprise-if Ichigo and the thing (who refused to choose a consistent name to go by) got too far apart from each other for too long, the thing started to…fade. Ichigo wouldn’t have given a shit except when it happened, it tended to trigger migraines in his own head. No one was sure if that meant the hollow would end up back in Ichigo’s world or if they’d both just die, but Ichigo was not real enthusiastic about either possibility.
And then there was Rukia. After the war she’d been given back her old position as Karakura’s shinigami plus Ichigo’s official contact with Soul Society plus the hollow’s minder, to make sure it didn’t start eating souls after all. It had only been natural for them to get close, and eventually it had only been natural for Ichigo to propose and for Rukia to say yes. This he was happy about. The part where his hollow came bouncing in immediately after Rukia had put on the ring and asked if this meant they could share one big bed now-“After all, partner, I’m still you”-that part, he wasn’t thrilled about.
Fuck ethics. It wasn’t like the thing did anything to earn its keep. While Ichigo worked his ass off studying to be a doctor and killing hollows with Rukia on the side, the thing did shit-all as far as he could tell. It refused to kill go out and kill hollows on Ichigo’s say-so, claiming religious beliefs. As an alternative, he’d gotten a gigai from Urahara and worked a variety of odd-jobs. Bartender, waiter, stripper-none of them had lasted long, and most of them had resulted in at least one person Ichigo knew asking why he’d gotten so pale and sickly. Ichigo had a sneaking suspicion where the hollow was on other nights it came home late, considering how many times Rukia-who maintained a covert sort of housefiancee role in public, despite the fact that she didn’t do a damn bit of cleaning-had been pulled aside by well-meaning people asking if she knew her boyfriend was hitting on other women at the bars.
Oh yeah. It was one big happy family.
Yeah, I don't know.