You were my silver lining...
The Jeep has been parked for a month and a day or few. I haven't smoked in the same amount of time. Soulfood and I have been walking everywhere there is to walk within walking distance. Scout and Zami frequently tag along. I've put miles between us, between the old and new life. It's been less about running away and more about strides in a new direction. I even shaved my mo' off and rebuilt a new one.
Today I was sauntering to school and Soulfood gets clever. She pulls out a song from the vault and flicks me in the earlobe. She smacks my brain matter and reminds me that honesty isn't just something you give to other people. I'm learning to live again. It's easier than I thought it would be. It hurts less than I thought it would. It's even become normal. But. You still pop by to say hey. You're still a litmus in the areas where we were amazing. It's bittersweet because I know I have to let go of that too. I can't compare; I can't climb into the mist of what was almost good enough - for both of us. I have to put you where you belong; in the room of lost things that I cherish. You'll be surrounded by some pretty amazing company in there. I'll make sure they have your favorite tea. And. When it's safe, I'll stop by to say hello and reminisce.