Why Do I Never 'Lose' Control.........?
I have been gathering energy for my L*pis Laz*li project......., and resting during the daytime lately.
I was reading at the 'site' of some of 'mankind's' 'strongest' 'mortals'..., the dudes with 'animesque' 'intellect' 'levels', and noted a 'ridiculous' 'video' lol....=^_^=.... .
I was laughing (hahahaha!) (*cackles*).
Reminded me of witnessing that '2014' 'f*ctionkin' 'board'......... .
Me? Decades ago, I observed at 'violence', 'criminals'........, and so much 'awful' 'stuff'...as I witnessed 'da' 'ghetto'.
Even noting '90's' 'schools', I noticed rampant racism and 'unfair' 'odds' '/' 'guilty' 'by' 'association' 'type' 'handicaps'.
My question is this...... .
Why have *I* never 'lost' control?
Why have *I*, within recalled memory, never 'lost' control?
I never 'broke'?
My "mind" and "heart" never 'broke'.
Not even when facing at 'G*d'....whilst in the grips of amnesia...?
(*Recalls 2004, and how I decided to stand up for what I believe in....not sure how I would *ever* be victorious at such a 'ferocious', 'horrifying', and 'powerful' 'opponent'*).
I never had a 'breakdown', and ***TRANSMUTED*** any and all of my pain, agony, and torment......into the raw vital energy....necessary to pursue my goals. (*Grins as remembers how, just like I said would be the case, I used my pain II years ago.......as fuel....to have & keep this current mountain sanctuary.......*).
Why...did I 'never' 'break' '/' 'chimp' 'out'?
I would not even *personally* know what a 'freak' 'out' is *like*? And if anything, I, whenever I noted 'supposedly' 'insurmountable' 'challenges', savored the chance to rise up....., and see what I'm made of.
In retrospect, I even *cherished* witnessing 'teh' 'crackheads', 'drunks', and 'roaches' (*giggles and then cackles*) to teh flophouse =^_^=!
Even with Nintendo stuff, I have never...even...'once'......'thrown' a Nintendo / etc controller..... . ***Never*** even thought of it, and asked (ago) if such memes as 'brraking' 'at' controllers.....was just some 'joke' or 'myth'.
While I have experienced defiance, and whilst I have protested at 'blatant' 'evil'....and defensively made certain tactical decisions that *had* to be made (given the information I had), I have apparently never experienced rage before.... . Neither 'rage', nor 'hatred'
I..I am wondering if I note 'depression', 'rage', and 'hatred' 'aren't' even true emotions.
I personally do not even think 'they' 'are'............., and there is much evidence..to support that. (Since real emotions seem to have environmental scale & observable effects).
*Thinks*.
I was reading at the 'site' of some of 'mankind's' 'strongest' 'mortals'..., the dudes with 'animesque' 'intellect' 'levels', and noted a 'ridiculous' 'video' lol....=^_^=.... .
Click to viewI was laughing (hahahaha!) (*cackles*).
Reminded me of witnessing that '2014' 'f*ctionkin' 'board'......... .
Me? Decades ago, I observed at 'violence', 'criminals'........, and so much 'awful' 'stuff'...as I witnessed 'da' 'ghetto'.
Even noting '90's' 'schools', I noticed rampant racism and 'unfair' 'odds' '/' 'guilty' 'by' 'association' 'type' 'handicaps'.
My question is this...... .
Why have *I* never 'lost' control?
Why have *I*, within recalled memory, never 'lost' control?
I never 'broke'?
My "mind" and "heart" never 'broke'.
Not even when facing at 'G*d'....whilst in the grips of amnesia...?
(*Recalls 2004, and how I decided to stand up for what I believe in....not sure how I would *ever* be victorious at such a 'ferocious', 'horrifying', and 'powerful' 'opponent'*).
I never had a 'breakdown', and ***TRANSMUTED*** any and all of my pain, agony, and torment......into the raw vital energy....necessary to pursue my goals. (*Grins as remembers how, just like I said would be the case, I used my pain II years ago.......as fuel....to have & keep this current mountain sanctuary.......*).
Why...did I 'never' 'break' '/' 'chimp' 'out'?
I would not even *personally* know what a 'freak' 'out' is *like*? And if anything, I, whenever I noted 'supposedly' 'insurmountable' 'challenges', savored the chance to rise up....., and see what I'm made of.
In retrospect, I even *cherished* witnessing 'teh' 'crackheads', 'drunks', and 'roaches' (*giggles and then cackles*) to teh flophouse =^_^=!
Even with Nintendo stuff, I have never...even...'once'......'thrown' a Nintendo / etc controller..... . ***Never*** even thought of it, and asked (ago) if such memes as 'brraking' 'at' controllers.....was just some 'joke' or 'myth'.
While I have experienced defiance, and whilst I have protested at 'blatant' 'evil'....and defensively made certain tactical decisions that *had* to be made (given the information I had), I have apparently never experienced rage before.... . Neither 'rage', nor 'hatred'
I..I am wondering if I note 'depression', 'rage', and 'hatred' 'aren't' even true emotions.
I personally do not even think 'they' 'are'............., and there is much evidence..to support that. (Since real emotions seem to have environmental scale & observable effects).
*Thinks*.