(no subject)
Today..was the scariest day of my life. Never in my existence have I prayed so much that someone was Ok and safe. I was waiting for pot and Danielle to come home, She said she was leaving early and by 8:00 she wasn't home. 8:10 Rolled around and I was just getting frustrated. Melissa wasn't calling when she said she'd be at my house in 20 minutes at 7:10, BUT Most of all...My precious wasn't home. I figured that they kept her till 8 cause a bunch of people came in, AND she was making sandwiches for us... 8:19...I get a phone call..It's danielle's mom and she sounded mad. She asked me "IS DANIELLE THERE?" I said "No..?" "CAUSE SHE GOT HIT BY A CAR"...I was in shock, but i didn't quite hear her at first so i said "what?" and she laid the story on me...it was heavy. I held it all in at first...cause right after that melissa called. I got my pot, walked in the house, fell to the floor and Broke down...I needed To see her soo bad...God. Danielle's mom was gonna have Christine pick me up, but that'll take too friggin long so i called Nina and told her to get me there ASAP. Even right now, My mind still is in a rushed state, I couldn't stand still for more then 10seconds cause i just felt so Awful and that I NEEDED to be there by her side. I grabbed the Heart Pendant we lost, and told nina to speed like a motherfucker. We passed 1 car and I figured it'd be kinda stupid that i'm on my way to see Danielle after she got into a car accident, and here i am, on the way, get into an accident myself....slowed down...
I think what was driving me nuts the most was, Is she ok? Is she Conscous? Whats broken? Is she even Alive?! I had No clue the severity of the situation, and it drove me insane, to think that the one person I've ever truly loved, was gone. How I can be talking to her on the phone, expecting her home, and bam- I never hear her voice..or see her face. It took alot for me to stop crying...Just picturing the incident in my head is gut-renching.
I'm still not making sense...i don't know what I want to say. I Love you so much Danielle. Turns out, she was ok, she was smiling when i saw her and talking to everyone, and just seeing her smile made me feel A HELLOVALot Better. I wanted so badly to climb in bed with her, and just wrap my arms around her and never loosen grip..just keep her safe. I thank God most of all, this happened but it could've been So much more worse, danielle is truly lucky. I have to be a good person now, cause I told God I would be if things pull through ok. I realised I have a selfish-pity issue and I'm gonna try to stop that as much as i can...whatever that meens. Aw fuck it, it's 2:45 in the morning, i can't sleep cause i'm so anxious to see her again in the morning. I'll end this here with a lousy quote of the night:
"You never know what you have, till it's gone." ..or think it is.
I think what was driving me nuts the most was, Is she ok? Is she Conscous? Whats broken? Is she even Alive?! I had No clue the severity of the situation, and it drove me insane, to think that the one person I've ever truly loved, was gone. How I can be talking to her on the phone, expecting her home, and bam- I never hear her voice..or see her face. It took alot for me to stop crying...Just picturing the incident in my head is gut-renching.
I'm still not making sense...i don't know what I want to say. I Love you so much Danielle. Turns out, she was ok, she was smiling when i saw her and talking to everyone, and just seeing her smile made me feel A HELLOVALot Better. I wanted so badly to climb in bed with her, and just wrap my arms around her and never loosen grip..just keep her safe. I thank God most of all, this happened but it could've been So much more worse, danielle is truly lucky. I have to be a good person now, cause I told God I would be if things pull through ok. I realised I have a selfish-pity issue and I'm gonna try to stop that as much as i can...whatever that meens. Aw fuck it, it's 2:45 in the morning, i can't sleep cause i'm so anxious to see her again in the morning. I'll end this here with a lousy quote of the night:
"You never know what you have, till it's gone." ..or think it is.