light a flame thrower
I am always heartened when I find good in the bad and laughter to combat stupidity.
"Now that I've turned 18," said Ginny, "Harry's going to want to have sex with me, isn't he?"
"It's not so bad, not even the first time," said Hermione, handing her a Diet Pepsi MAX to calm her.
"That's right," said Luna, sipping her Pepsi MAX. "Cho used a bottle. It only hurt a little."
"But I don't know anything!" Ginny said. "Until I turned 18 I couldn't even know sex existed!"
"That's why we've sat you down with a nice bottle of Diet Pepsi MAX," said Cho. "Ask anything."
Luna fingered her necklace, made of Diet Pepsi MAX caps. "Anything about sex, that is."
"Okay," said Ginny, with a sip of Pepsi. "Well... is it true you can get pregnant from sex?"
"Not if you use Pepsi bottles instead!" said Hermione brightly. "That's what I make Ron do."
"On him or on you?" asked Cho, curious. "Both! Well, until that time he got stuck."
"There are other ways you can use Diet Pepsi MAX to not end up up the duff," said Luna.
Hermione nodded. "You can drink Diet Pepsi MAX instead of sex. It's almost as much fun!"
"And if Harry complains, hit him on the head with your bottle of Diet Pepsi MAX."
Cho drank a caffeinated gulp and vibrated a little. "Violence is better than sex anyway."
"Or I heard that you can put Pepsi, um, up you, after," said Cho, "and then you're safe."
"That's what Cedric said. Of course we didn't think about sex, because we weren't 18."
"That's what Fleur meant by douche!" said Ginny. "I was underage, I thought she showered in Pepsi."
"It's true, Pepsi kills man-juice," said Luna. "I asked Snape, and he said, so it must be true."
"And the extra caffiene in DIET PEPSI MAX increases the acidity, which helps," said Hermione.
"And it brings your ancestors back from the dead!" added Cho, with a touch of racism for flavor.read the original here
"Now that I've turned 18," said Ginny, "Harry's going to want to have sex with me, isn't he?"
"It's not so bad, not even the first time," said Hermione, handing her a Diet Pepsi MAX to calm her.
"That's right," said Luna, sipping her Pepsi MAX. "Cho used a bottle. It only hurt a little."
"But I don't know anything!" Ginny said. "Until I turned 18 I couldn't even know sex existed!"
"That's why we've sat you down with a nice bottle of Diet Pepsi MAX," said Cho. "Ask anything."
Luna fingered her necklace, made of Diet Pepsi MAX caps. "Anything about sex, that is."
"Okay," said Ginny, with a sip of Pepsi. "Well... is it true you can get pregnant from sex?"
"Not if you use Pepsi bottles instead!" said Hermione brightly. "That's what I make Ron do."
"On him or on you?" asked Cho, curious. "Both! Well, until that time he got stuck."
"There are other ways you can use Diet Pepsi MAX to not end up up the duff," said Luna.
Hermione nodded. "You can drink Diet Pepsi MAX instead of sex. It's almost as much fun!"
"And if Harry complains, hit him on the head with your bottle of Diet Pepsi MAX."
Cho drank a caffeinated gulp and vibrated a little. "Violence is better than sex anyway."
"Or I heard that you can put Pepsi, um, up you, after," said Cho, "and then you're safe."
"That's what Cedric said. Of course we didn't think about sex, because we weren't 18."
"That's what Fleur meant by douche!" said Ginny. "I was underage, I thought she showered in Pepsi."
"It's true, Pepsi kills man-juice," said Luna. "I asked Snape, and he said, so it must be true."
"And the extra caffiene in DIET PEPSI MAX increases the acidity, which helps," said Hermione.
"And it brings your ancestors back from the dead!" added Cho, with a touch of racism for flavor.read the original here