(no subject)
hmm so another chapter of my life is now complete! (the liberty chapter), the name being the most ironic aspect of the whole experience. LIBERTY?! jerry picked the perfect oxymoron.
i'm so glad i moved away from florida... it makes me realize how much is really out there. if i had the bank account i would live in a different place each year for the rest of my life. i love change... but somehow i always get sick of what i expected to last forever. i guess i just have to accept change as an integral part of my life, unavoidable and bound to happen.
i am returning back to florida for the summer today! bittersweet.
so far, i haven't been able to count on any one person or thing for my WHOLE life. yes, i can count on certain people in different ways, but no one that i can trust wholly and without doubts. except for now... there's aje! the best friend that i could have ever asked for. i do think that God sent her to VA to visit me last semester! we haven't parted since! haha. so yeah, thank you aje. :)
with the whole male situation... i'm starting to think, no i'm sure that, it would be much easier to just be the one in control. i wish more than anything that i could do just that, but somehow i always become vulnerable and place myself in a position where they know that whatever happens is "up to them"
so... i screw myself over time and again. same story each time... just a different face. but i won't lose hope! no matter how discouraged i get, i have to realize that every other person has felt this way... i shouldn't take pity on myself, i feel no more pain than the next person. the sunshine always comes after the rain... hopefully the sunshine is in florida!
i'm so glad i moved away from florida... it makes me realize how much is really out there. if i had the bank account i would live in a different place each year for the rest of my life. i love change... but somehow i always get sick of what i expected to last forever. i guess i just have to accept change as an integral part of my life, unavoidable and bound to happen.
i am returning back to florida for the summer today! bittersweet.
so far, i haven't been able to count on any one person or thing for my WHOLE life. yes, i can count on certain people in different ways, but no one that i can trust wholly and without doubts. except for now... there's aje! the best friend that i could have ever asked for. i do think that God sent her to VA to visit me last semester! we haven't parted since! haha. so yeah, thank you aje. :)
with the whole male situation... i'm starting to think, no i'm sure that, it would be much easier to just be the one in control. i wish more than anything that i could do just that, but somehow i always become vulnerable and place myself in a position where they know that whatever happens is "up to them"
so... i screw myself over time and again. same story each time... just a different face. but i won't lose hope! no matter how discouraged i get, i have to realize that every other person has felt this way... i shouldn't take pity on myself, i feel no more pain than the next person. the sunshine always comes after the rain... hopefully the sunshine is in florida!