.
i have never ever been so confused in my life!
i have never felt so dumb.
i have never been so insecure, and i have never liked anyone this much!
i should have known that anything that felt so perfect was too good to be true.
i'm definitly making some changes in my life... no more i'm sorrys, and no more depending on other people for everything.
i'm going to start standing up for myself and stop caring so much for other peoples feelings so that i can reach the point where i will be self confident and self managed!
i'm sorry aje for causing trouble in your life, because of my mistakes.
"everything works together for the good"
so i am going to make the best out of the situation at hand, and learn as much as i can from the experience.
i've fucked up royally... but nothing will change that. i can only change what i do in the future, so that is what i will do!
if he gives me another chance to interact in a relationship like a normal person, and not a needy insecure girl, i am going to do all that i can to move past my inhibitions and into a "normal" state of mind and interaction.
but... i'm not counting on that.
what i am counting on is MYSELF!
i have no clue where to go or what to do next.
liberty is out of the question.
my plans to move to roanoke for the summer and atlanta for school in the fall are most likely not happening.
aje is probably still moving to roanoke, which she should! i would love to move with her, and i can't imagine my life without her in it, but as of now eric just doesn't think that we should all live together. same scenario with georgia.
florida... is not somewhere that i want to go. i do not want to go back to my mother who sucks the life out of me! she is the reason that i am so fucked up at the moment. i can't return to what screwed me up with the first place. but i might just have to do that.
i love my friends, the few that i do have!
thank you so much for putting up with me :)
but i'm not sorry! haha.
i have never felt so dumb.
i have never been so insecure, and i have never liked anyone this much!
i should have known that anything that felt so perfect was too good to be true.
i'm definitly making some changes in my life... no more i'm sorrys, and no more depending on other people for everything.
i'm going to start standing up for myself and stop caring so much for other peoples feelings so that i can reach the point where i will be self confident and self managed!
i'm sorry aje for causing trouble in your life, because of my mistakes.
"everything works together for the good"
so i am going to make the best out of the situation at hand, and learn as much as i can from the experience.
i've fucked up royally... but nothing will change that. i can only change what i do in the future, so that is what i will do!
if he gives me another chance to interact in a relationship like a normal person, and not a needy insecure girl, i am going to do all that i can to move past my inhibitions and into a "normal" state of mind and interaction.
but... i'm not counting on that.
what i am counting on is MYSELF!
i have no clue where to go or what to do next.
liberty is out of the question.
my plans to move to roanoke for the summer and atlanta for school in the fall are most likely not happening.
aje is probably still moving to roanoke, which she should! i would love to move with her, and i can't imagine my life without her in it, but as of now eric just doesn't think that we should all live together. same scenario with georgia.
florida... is not somewhere that i want to go. i do not want to go back to my mother who sucks the life out of me! she is the reason that i am so fucked up at the moment. i can't return to what screwed me up with the first place. but i might just have to do that.
i love my friends, the few that i do have!
thank you so much for putting up with me :)
but i'm not sorry! haha.