Blah blah blah...
Well, I'm officially moved out and on my own. Everyone told me how hard it would be financially, but no one said how hard it would be emotionally. I've been so depressed this past week, all I've done is cry at my place and try not to cry when I'm at work. My mom and I aren't the type to talk about everything and share, but she's always been a constant presence - always there - and being alone in an apartment at night is so...depressing. I just want to go back home all the time. When I wake up in the morning, it's always a disappointment to see my ceiling and know that it's this new place that's supposed to be my new place, but still feels like a stranger's home.
I feel a little better now that a week has passed, but still no where close to being happy or excited or anything I thought I'd feel when I moved out. I dunno...it's just disturbing and depressing and I don't like it. People say that things will get better with time, which I know is true, but it doesn't change the fact that I feel like crap right now. Mostly I'm trying to distract myself by decorating and cleaning and stuff, but that doesn't work for very long. I still think it was definitely time for me to move out on my own - past time, really - but all I can feel is the need to go home and be with my mom.
Why are feelings so complicated?
This entry was originally posted at http://jadehunter.dreamwidth.org/178201.html. Please comment there using OpenID.
I feel a little better now that a week has passed, but still no where close to being happy or excited or anything I thought I'd feel when I moved out. I dunno...it's just disturbing and depressing and I don't like it. People say that things will get better with time, which I know is true, but it doesn't change the fact that I feel like crap right now. Mostly I'm trying to distract myself by decorating and cleaning and stuff, but that doesn't work for very long. I still think it was definitely time for me to move out on my own - past time, really - but all I can feel is the need to go home and be with my mom.
Why are feelings so complicated?
This entry was originally posted at http://jadehunter.dreamwidth.org/178201.html. Please comment there using OpenID.