(no subject)
it seems i've lied. it's been more than six months, it's been almost a year.
school is going alright. 4.0 average in my first term, but this term is eating away at me. placement, hard course material (emotionally and academically), and juggling 3 online courses.
my great grandmother passed away last august. my grandfather still is stubborn, and not in a home. he can't walk well anymore. every time i talk to my mom she seems to be falling apart, and my dad won't slow down at work.
i have jury duty on monday. i don't want to go, i have better things to do, like accumulate placement hours. everyone tells me to act biased, act 'feminist', and i'll get out of it. the whole thing feels like a farce.
for the first time in 25 years i didn't see my parents on christmas day. instead doug and i hosted a boxing day dinner for my parents and grandparents (on my mom's side). and as usual, ignored doug's family. amy and daniel are apparently getting married this year. that'll be interesting.
i punched a pregnant squirrel, and threw a mouse (by hand) out of our apartment on new year's eve. i became overly obsessed with a song of ice and fire. i'm reading more.
yesterday in child witness to violence we had a "play day" and i drew for the first time in years. i'm actually really proud of what i drew. it was a dwarf, he has a balloon instead of an axe.
i've been in protests. i've been civilly disobedient. i've raised money for causes and marched down streets. i subscribe to magazines that claim to be feminist responses to pop culture. i'm finally an activist.
i miss my friends terribly, but i'm also terrible at letting them know and doing something about it. amanda lives directly across the street and i barely see her every few weeks.
i'm discovering things about myself that i feel i should have discovered years ago. i'm pretty sure i'm gender fluid. it's complicated, and probably doesn't need a name. but it feels better to me.
i should go to sleep. i work half way across the city in 8 hours.
school is going alright. 4.0 average in my first term, but this term is eating away at me. placement, hard course material (emotionally and academically), and juggling 3 online courses.
my great grandmother passed away last august. my grandfather still is stubborn, and not in a home. he can't walk well anymore. every time i talk to my mom she seems to be falling apart, and my dad won't slow down at work.
i have jury duty on monday. i don't want to go, i have better things to do, like accumulate placement hours. everyone tells me to act biased, act 'feminist', and i'll get out of it. the whole thing feels like a farce.
for the first time in 25 years i didn't see my parents on christmas day. instead doug and i hosted a boxing day dinner for my parents and grandparents (on my mom's side). and as usual, ignored doug's family. amy and daniel are apparently getting married this year. that'll be interesting.
i punched a pregnant squirrel, and threw a mouse (by hand) out of our apartment on new year's eve. i became overly obsessed with a song of ice and fire. i'm reading more.
yesterday in child witness to violence we had a "play day" and i drew for the first time in years. i'm actually really proud of what i drew. it was a dwarf, he has a balloon instead of an axe.
i've been in protests. i've been civilly disobedient. i've raised money for causes and marched down streets. i subscribe to magazines that claim to be feminist responses to pop culture. i'm finally an activist.
i miss my friends terribly, but i'm also terrible at letting them know and doing something about it. amanda lives directly across the street and i barely see her every few weeks.
i'm discovering things about myself that i feel i should have discovered years ago. i'm pretty sure i'm gender fluid. it's complicated, and probably doesn't need a name. but it feels better to me.
i should go to sleep. i work half way across the city in 8 hours.