The Importance Of Immortality
I know the secret of time travel. You're looking at a little bit of it right now. See, what I'm writing this very moment, won't be read by you until a later moment. Thus, I have accomlished time travel, I am speaking to you from the past, or rather, giving you a message in the future.
I don't know why I wanted to share that with you. It's not even my idea, but I really like it. It's just something rolling around...time travel, what a trip, daddy-o.
Okay, this past weekend, I've gotten a good hard look at who I am, and who I was, both at the same time. See, I had some of my new friends meeting some of my old friends. Some who know what I've been doing lately, and some who know what I did back then. I don't know if any of it clicked in their eyes, or even mattered to them, but to me, it pointed out the importance of some of the decisions I have made, and where I've gone wrong, and how I can make them better. See, I used to think that sex with a girl meant that she loved me. Then, most of the girls I had sex with turned out to be bigger players than guys. So, I got cocky, a little arrogant, and thought I could change that...I could make things right. And in the meantime, didn't realize I had become something of a manwhore. So, I made the decision to stop. Cold turkey. It's not as bad as it seems, a bit lonely sometimes, but better than having your heart and trust broken over and over again. But, this past weekend, I've realized I've become somewhat of a hermit compared to who I was. My old friends remember the wild times and crazy stories. My new friends haven't ever seen that side come out. This past weekend, it came out...somewhat harshly at first, but in a little bit I was back in the swing, yet clinging on to some of my new outlook. I did NOT go and talk to the girls that were giving me the eye, despite being told by almost everyone at the table that those ladies were giving me the eye. Old me, I'd have tried (and probably gotten beaten up by their husbands). New me, wouldn't have even cared and ignored them altogether. Somewhere in between is where I want to be. Outgoing, without the mission of getting a girl.
So, I'm going to work on bringing back some of my social outgoing personality, keep the manwhore locked away, and bring a little bit more fun to my life. And I have some goals now...serious goals.
1) I'm going to be better with my money. I have to be, but more importantly now, I want to be. I'll probably lose weight, and get a little cranky about money issues for the next week or so, until I can get a plan that makes sense to me down, but I'm tired of being a paycheck to paycheck guy.
2) I'm going to take better care of my appearance and my "temple". I'm not just talking about losing weight. In fact, I probably mean the opposite. Korby, a new friend I just met, had complimented that my body did not fit how everyone else described me. It was better. Good ego boost, but I wondered why nobody else saw it...it's because they've been too close, so now, I want to make it obvious to everyone. Mostly, to myself (because I was part of the group that didn't see it). I want to make me look like how I want to look, and think my personality should look. I'm ready for that change.
3) Get help. Thanks to those who have offered my advice in previous posts. I will be doing follow-ups, and will more than likely ramble on more about it in future posts, but I realize I won't be able to change and accomplish goals 1 and 2 on my own...I'm going to need help, psychological or otherwise.
And finally, 4) I'm going to live. Not just exist. Not just wait for God's influence to strike wonder upon me and fullfill some purpose I have no idea about. I'm not waiting to hear what His plan is, I'm just going to live. I'll figure out his plan on my deathbed, when I can look back and say, "Ooooh, so THAT'S what it was." But for now, this time traveler is just going to live. One day at a time.
I hope the next sunrise for you is as sweet as the next one for me is going to be. Until then, faithful readers and true believers.
I don't know why I wanted to share that with you. It's not even my idea, but I really like it. It's just something rolling around...time travel, what a trip, daddy-o.
Okay, this past weekend, I've gotten a good hard look at who I am, and who I was, both at the same time. See, I had some of my new friends meeting some of my old friends. Some who know what I've been doing lately, and some who know what I did back then. I don't know if any of it clicked in their eyes, or even mattered to them, but to me, it pointed out the importance of some of the decisions I have made, and where I've gone wrong, and how I can make them better. See, I used to think that sex with a girl meant that she loved me. Then, most of the girls I had sex with turned out to be bigger players than guys. So, I got cocky, a little arrogant, and thought I could change that...I could make things right. And in the meantime, didn't realize I had become something of a manwhore. So, I made the decision to stop. Cold turkey. It's not as bad as it seems, a bit lonely sometimes, but better than having your heart and trust broken over and over again. But, this past weekend, I've realized I've become somewhat of a hermit compared to who I was. My old friends remember the wild times and crazy stories. My new friends haven't ever seen that side come out. This past weekend, it came out...somewhat harshly at first, but in a little bit I was back in the swing, yet clinging on to some of my new outlook. I did NOT go and talk to the girls that were giving me the eye, despite being told by almost everyone at the table that those ladies were giving me the eye. Old me, I'd have tried (and probably gotten beaten up by their husbands). New me, wouldn't have even cared and ignored them altogether. Somewhere in between is where I want to be. Outgoing, without the mission of getting a girl.
So, I'm going to work on bringing back some of my social outgoing personality, keep the manwhore locked away, and bring a little bit more fun to my life. And I have some goals now...serious goals.
1) I'm going to be better with my money. I have to be, but more importantly now, I want to be. I'll probably lose weight, and get a little cranky about money issues for the next week or so, until I can get a plan that makes sense to me down, but I'm tired of being a paycheck to paycheck guy.
2) I'm going to take better care of my appearance and my "temple". I'm not just talking about losing weight. In fact, I probably mean the opposite. Korby, a new friend I just met, had complimented that my body did not fit how everyone else described me. It was better. Good ego boost, but I wondered why nobody else saw it...it's because they've been too close, so now, I want to make it obvious to everyone. Mostly, to myself (because I was part of the group that didn't see it). I want to make me look like how I want to look, and think my personality should look. I'm ready for that change.
3) Get help. Thanks to those who have offered my advice in previous posts. I will be doing follow-ups, and will more than likely ramble on more about it in future posts, but I realize I won't be able to change and accomplish goals 1 and 2 on my own...I'm going to need help, psychological or otherwise.
And finally, 4) I'm going to live. Not just exist. Not just wait for God's influence to strike wonder upon me and fullfill some purpose I have no idea about. I'm not waiting to hear what His plan is, I'm just going to live. I'll figure out his plan on my deathbed, when I can look back and say, "Ooooh, so THAT'S what it was." But for now, this time traveler is just going to live. One day at a time.
I hope the next sunrise for you is as sweet as the next one for me is going to be. Until then, faithful readers and true believers.