fire away

May 08, 2006 18:00

playing on the beaches of Surat Thani, the sun descends casting orange light throught the smog. i am running through the surf thinking of nothing and everyhting. a fish a baby blowfish struggles on the end of a line abandoned by someone. bait. i will wade it out into the gulf so that it can breathe. but no, you say, you will just cast it out, let it soar through the air on the hook end of a filament. i climb up the rocks to you, the hems of my wet camos gather white sand.
riding down the beach behind gun turrets, standing holding tight don't fall off, here they come.
he is speaking crazy the ranger with the beard and winter hat. he's not part of our company. why is his dress cap made of corderoy, he is crazy, high on coke, it is hot and he won't shed a drop of sweat. but we keep drinking and talking. he tells me and i tell him, neither of us will win this argument.
the beach is orange and yellow the sky red and gold in the dying light hold on don't fall off. i climb the algae slick rocks to you, cast the baby fish into the pounding surf so we can go. we ride over churned sand standing moving sideways, hold tight here they come the sound of machine gun fire, they are piled in a bus filled with ammunition, they are filled with ammunition, i am running out of ammunition, help me, but you are gone, my bullets are gone, the entire company is gone. they slaughtered my entire platoon. i am home now. i still have dreams of sand, surf, red with sun and blood. my friend, the doctor, she knows because i told her, she gives me a charm, a silver venus put your thumb on her heart, can you feel it beat? i can. she will help you as she has helped me. the sand burns my eyes, i blink, i am home. the crazy man is there, the ranger. i ignore him. my brother, my friend the doctor, her wife, they all know because i told them. i saw my entire platoon slaughtered. there are others here, i ignore them and drink instead. the doctors wife arrives with more beer and devil horns, i light a cigarette and try to smoke when i look at her she smiles and i see the sun, my hand shakes as i smoke and i think of blood when she talks to me i hear gunfire, she hugs me and i remember death, i am riding down the beach arms straining to hold on as i fire away fire away fire away...run away run away i clutch the silver venus in one hand a cigarette in the other and try to flee. she won't let me holds tighter as i scream i still see the beach have dreams of sand and surf bathed in sun and blood hold tight don't fall off...
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