(no subject)
so i am signed up for next semester... i guess that i can say that i am happy with the schedule i got. it wasn't what i originally wanted but it'll do. still on the topic of school, i have a lot of papers and what-not to do over the thanksgiving break, which i should probably start worrying about asap, but you know me... i'm great at procrastinating as much as possible. i'll get everything done, and most likely get pretty decent grades so whatever...
on another not so blah topic, i never seem to fail at confusing myself. i know that i still have feels for chris, but i also want to hang out with other guys that have been showing interest in me for quite some time now. i know that getting back with chris is what i should do, but i worry of i do that i might end up doing something stupid that would kill us... so the right thing to do is to take a break or whatever we decide to call it and get all this out of my system, right? well i think that's what i decided to do, but i don't know how well chris is going to play along with my stupid girly indulgences. i'm scared that i'm going to lose him while i'm getting whatever this is out of me... so this is where i'm torn. i know that i don't need to be with him right now, but if i'm not i think that i'm going to lose him all together. plus it's not really fair that once again he must wait on me to make up my mind... i did something like this to him at the very beginning of our romantic-ish relationship.... i think that i love him, but i just don't want to indulge that emotion right now... i want to be 18 with no commitments and get into a little trouble for a little bit. i've never really been able to do that, and right now i need to do that more than anything else bc if i don't now it will come back to haunt me, i'm sure of it... so once again i'm being my wonderful indecisive self :P...
~*~ with much love to all ~*~
on another not so blah topic, i never seem to fail at confusing myself. i know that i still have feels for chris, but i also want to hang out with other guys that have been showing interest in me for quite some time now. i know that getting back with chris is what i should do, but i worry of i do that i might end up doing something stupid that would kill us... so the right thing to do is to take a break or whatever we decide to call it and get all this out of my system, right? well i think that's what i decided to do, but i don't know how well chris is going to play along with my stupid girly indulgences. i'm scared that i'm going to lose him while i'm getting whatever this is out of me... so this is where i'm torn. i know that i don't need to be with him right now, but if i'm not i think that i'm going to lose him all together. plus it's not really fair that once again he must wait on me to make up my mind... i did something like this to him at the very beginning of our romantic-ish relationship.... i think that i love him, but i just don't want to indulge that emotion right now... i want to be 18 with no commitments and get into a little trouble for a little bit. i've never really been able to do that, and right now i need to do that more than anything else bc if i don't now it will come back to haunt me, i'm sure of it... so once again i'm being my wonderful indecisive self :P...
~*~ with much love to all ~*~