Rant
So the other day I made a phone call to a woman that I was friends with in highschool. Mind you it's been about 10 years since I talked to her. She still sends me xmas letters every year to my mom's house. But recently she sent an entire packet filled with the letters I sent her right after I left Centralia, saying she had recently found them and thought I might want them. Ok first off if I send you letters their for you to keep not return, but this is Jenna a weird one. She is what we refer to as Molly Mormon, yes she is one of my old Mormon friends, the funny thing is in ways shes not much different than other people I know who aren't Mormon.
So I decide to call her and let her know I received every letter, and she totally freaks out cause she can't believe its me. We were very close friends afterall. She asks me how I'm doin, and reiterates some of the finer points of my life the constant moving, the divorce, the total lack of direction on my part. And I tell her I remarried the same man, and filled her in on the many journeys of the Hudson clan. She then catches me up on her life and talks about all her many projects(her spanish preschool,managing the complex they live in, and music lessons, all her volunteer work.), how her husband travels all over the globe, and how even though they could live in a 3 bedroom for free she thinks its better for the girls(she has 3 daughters) to learn about sacrifice and live in a 2bdrm. Ok to sum up pretty much the whole conversation was Jenna telling me about how wonderful her life is and how she feels sorry for me cause it must be so hard for me. She automatically assumed we lived in subsidized housing because Aaron works customer service and that doesn't pay very well. And yes we live in subsidized housing for the first time ever by choice, and most people don't even know it is subsidized housing unless I tell them. Then she proceeds to make a comment about how moving around so much couldn't have been good for Moira. I start to get a little aggrevated at this point, but I keep my cool and tell her that Moira has become very adaptable because of it and she is very well adjusted.
So I've spent alot of time thinking lately and talking to Aaron about a common problem we have. We are so sick of people thinking because we make less money our life must suck. Yes we do not own a house, yes we don't have a brand new car, yes it takes planning to buy Moira the extras(but we still do). Honestly, some of the happiest times we've had have been when we were at our poorest. What troubles me the most is how so many of the people we know who have more money than us talk constantly about how wonderful their lives are, it's like their trying to convince themselves. We don't talk much about it cause we know we have a wonderful life. Jenna spent a majority of her time talking about all the things they can afford to do and how busy they are. The girl pretty much went to college to get a man, if you ask me that is a waste of time and money. Yes, I want to go to college and make something more of myself than a housewife. I know what a noble job it is to be a housewife, but I also know that I want to be a geologist, and the funny thing is Aaron and Moira want that for me too. Moira is excited for the day when I become a Geologist, she wants to travel with us. The thing is whatever choices we make; Aaron, Moira, and I make them together as a team.
We don't want to own a house; its too much work and trouble. Aaron doesn't want to spend the free time he has mowing the lawn, he wants to spend it with us. Plus we want to have the freedom to pick up and go(I think we were gypsies in a past life). We don't want to own a huge,brand new car; first off we don't want to contribute to the reason our soldiers are in Iraq. When we can afford it we think it would be cool to own that new car that runs on hydrogen. Talk about saving on gas. We have chosen our life and we love it.
She then made a comment about how I smoke and drink. You know what I think I'm aware of that. Smoking is a nasty habit, I think I know that, I've tried to quit, it's not exactly an easy thing to do. The thing is it is the only horrible thing I do, I'm not beating my child or ignoring her, or going out and doin drugs, or cheating on my spouse, or many of the other horrible things people do. I smoke and one of these days I will have the strength to quit. I find it interesting that even though I'm not Christian, I behave more like one than most do. I don't say things about people unless I'm willing to hear all the bad things about myself.
I know this is long, but I've held my tongue for a long time about this. Don't judge me and my life, and certainly don't feel sorry for me or my family we love our life, we are content. I'd rather have very little material wise and get to spend quality time with my husband and daughter instead of having a husband I never see so that I can have a bunch of material things. What good is having those things if you have no one to share it with, and the time you have together is spent worrying about how your going to pay for those things. When I do become a Geologist I'm not going to leave my family behind to go research, they are coming with me (hopefully to Italy). They are my life and whatever we do we do it together.
You know I may not be your average American housewife, and I may be unusual, but Aaron told me that's why he married me. He said "you aren't boring, and I love to listen to you talk about everything you know, you make my life interesting." I know who I am, I am a good mother who talks to her daughter about anything she wants to know, I am a wife who knows there is not a better man in the world than her husband, a sister who loves her siblings beyond comprehension, a daughter who knows her parents are flawed but knows they love their children, a friend who will always be there eventhough we may be angry with eachother, and a woman who makes mistakes but isn't afraid to say she is wrong. Ya I may smoke, and drink , and put my foot in my mouth alot, and I like to dance with hot chicks. But I'm a good person, and I make no apologies for who I am. To borrow a page from the Christians "let ye without sin be the first to cast a stone".
So I decide to call her and let her know I received every letter, and she totally freaks out cause she can't believe its me. We were very close friends afterall. She asks me how I'm doin, and reiterates some of the finer points of my life the constant moving, the divorce, the total lack of direction on my part. And I tell her I remarried the same man, and filled her in on the many journeys of the Hudson clan. She then catches me up on her life and talks about all her many projects(her spanish preschool,managing the complex they live in, and music lessons, all her volunteer work.), how her husband travels all over the globe, and how even though they could live in a 3 bedroom for free she thinks its better for the girls(she has 3 daughters) to learn about sacrifice and live in a 2bdrm. Ok to sum up pretty much the whole conversation was Jenna telling me about how wonderful her life is and how she feels sorry for me cause it must be so hard for me. She automatically assumed we lived in subsidized housing because Aaron works customer service and that doesn't pay very well. And yes we live in subsidized housing for the first time ever by choice, and most people don't even know it is subsidized housing unless I tell them. Then she proceeds to make a comment about how moving around so much couldn't have been good for Moira. I start to get a little aggrevated at this point, but I keep my cool and tell her that Moira has become very adaptable because of it and she is very well adjusted.
So I've spent alot of time thinking lately and talking to Aaron about a common problem we have. We are so sick of people thinking because we make less money our life must suck. Yes we do not own a house, yes we don't have a brand new car, yes it takes planning to buy Moira the extras(but we still do). Honestly, some of the happiest times we've had have been when we were at our poorest. What troubles me the most is how so many of the people we know who have more money than us talk constantly about how wonderful their lives are, it's like their trying to convince themselves. We don't talk much about it cause we know we have a wonderful life. Jenna spent a majority of her time talking about all the things they can afford to do and how busy they are. The girl pretty much went to college to get a man, if you ask me that is a waste of time and money. Yes, I want to go to college and make something more of myself than a housewife. I know what a noble job it is to be a housewife, but I also know that I want to be a geologist, and the funny thing is Aaron and Moira want that for me too. Moira is excited for the day when I become a Geologist, she wants to travel with us. The thing is whatever choices we make; Aaron, Moira, and I make them together as a team.
We don't want to own a house; its too much work and trouble. Aaron doesn't want to spend the free time he has mowing the lawn, he wants to spend it with us. Plus we want to have the freedom to pick up and go(I think we were gypsies in a past life). We don't want to own a huge,brand new car; first off we don't want to contribute to the reason our soldiers are in Iraq. When we can afford it we think it would be cool to own that new car that runs on hydrogen. Talk about saving on gas. We have chosen our life and we love it.
She then made a comment about how I smoke and drink. You know what I think I'm aware of that. Smoking is a nasty habit, I think I know that, I've tried to quit, it's not exactly an easy thing to do. The thing is it is the only horrible thing I do, I'm not beating my child or ignoring her, or going out and doin drugs, or cheating on my spouse, or many of the other horrible things people do. I smoke and one of these days I will have the strength to quit. I find it interesting that even though I'm not Christian, I behave more like one than most do. I don't say things about people unless I'm willing to hear all the bad things about myself.
I know this is long, but I've held my tongue for a long time about this. Don't judge me and my life, and certainly don't feel sorry for me or my family we love our life, we are content. I'd rather have very little material wise and get to spend quality time with my husband and daughter instead of having a husband I never see so that I can have a bunch of material things. What good is having those things if you have no one to share it with, and the time you have together is spent worrying about how your going to pay for those things. When I do become a Geologist I'm not going to leave my family behind to go research, they are coming with me (hopefully to Italy). They are my life and whatever we do we do it together.
You know I may not be your average American housewife, and I may be unusual, but Aaron told me that's why he married me. He said "you aren't boring, and I love to listen to you talk about everything you know, you make my life interesting." I know who I am, I am a good mother who talks to her daughter about anything she wants to know, I am a wife who knows there is not a better man in the world than her husband, a sister who loves her siblings beyond comprehension, a daughter who knows her parents are flawed but knows they love their children, a friend who will always be there eventhough we may be angry with eachother, and a woman who makes mistakes but isn't afraid to say she is wrong. Ya I may smoke, and drink , and put my foot in my mouth alot, and I like to dance with hot chicks. But I'm a good person, and I make no apologies for who I am. To borrow a page from the Christians "let ye without sin be the first to cast a stone".