Burning every bridge to get lost
Listening to elliott smith isnt going to do anything for me today. Its just one of those days when you realize that it just isnt there. Its gone. Or was it ever here?
I hate this jealousy whenever i see everyone. Its not like its their fault that I feel this way. But i still hate looking at them anyways.
My friends are always too fucked up on the weekends to remember to call me, even when they said that they would. Even so, they have enough good people company, so they dont need mine to add too it.
I wonder if hiding for a while would help? Maybe if I hid for a few weeks, people would begin to miss me and suddenly want my company.
Its not just that my friends are all too good for me (but they always were too good to me), i jsut feel like shit. So maybe that makes me exaggerate things more. But I dont care. Im lonely, and it hurts, a.k.a its lame.
It doesnt help that I found out that the guy that i was crushing on, whome I was obviously crushing on and who acted like he liked me back...doesnt really. With all the nice words and actions and thoughts, he was just warming me up so he could get into my pants.
This is all just fucking great.
I want that one circle of friends. You know, the one where you can do everything with, every goddamn weekend, cause you all love each other so much. Im tired of the going back and fourth between groups of people, which in reality is that I dont really have a place to go.
jesus...talk about self-centered, eh?
anyways, I've once again ended up as just a person we all know, but still nothing special.
I hate this jealousy whenever i see everyone. Its not like its their fault that I feel this way. But i still hate looking at them anyways.
My friends are always too fucked up on the weekends to remember to call me, even when they said that they would. Even so, they have enough good people company, so they dont need mine to add too it.
I wonder if hiding for a while would help? Maybe if I hid for a few weeks, people would begin to miss me and suddenly want my company.
Its not just that my friends are all too good for me (but they always were too good to me), i jsut feel like shit. So maybe that makes me exaggerate things more. But I dont care. Im lonely, and it hurts, a.k.a its lame.
It doesnt help that I found out that the guy that i was crushing on, whome I was obviously crushing on and who acted like he liked me back...doesnt really. With all the nice words and actions and thoughts, he was just warming me up so he could get into my pants.
This is all just fucking great.
I want that one circle of friends. You know, the one where you can do everything with, every goddamn weekend, cause you all love each other so much. Im tired of the going back and fourth between groups of people, which in reality is that I dont really have a place to go.
jesus...talk about self-centered, eh?
anyways, I've once again ended up as just a person we all know, but still nothing special.