I hate this semester
This is me venting and ranting, feel free to skip.
Ok so this is something that hasn't happened in a long time. I'm crumbling. Not just cracking or bending under the stress but I feel like I'm just crumbling. Maybe going straight from undergrad to grad wasn't the best idea. It worked best financially and probably practically, but psychologically I'm beat. Things with my Mom probably played a big factor into just how drained I am right now. For the first time I have seriously considered dropping a class. Every time I'd entertained the thought before I could never convince myself there were enough good reasons, now I'm trying to remember why I can't and how it would be a waste of the time I've put into it already this semester. Living with Amelia is ok, but living with the girl's is much better and I miss it. Then last week I had migraine symptoms all week and the pain for several days while trying to write a critical analysis of Angels in America. I think I need a vacation. A REAL vacation, not just going home or spending a day or two on a tight schedule. I want to go someplace where I can just be and do what I want when I want with whom I want. Jes has a cabin in Pen. and I really want to go ASAP. No TV. No cell phone. No internet. Just me and my friends and nature and whatever crafts/books/games we bring with us. Hopefully having my own place this summer and not being stuck in the energy black hole that is my family's house or in their ever present daily drama will help recharge me to get through the last year of my Master's work. I think it will be fantastic as long as I can get a job to pay my rent.
Ok so this is something that hasn't happened in a long time. I'm crumbling. Not just cracking or bending under the stress but I feel like I'm just crumbling. Maybe going straight from undergrad to grad wasn't the best idea. It worked best financially and probably practically, but psychologically I'm beat. Things with my Mom probably played a big factor into just how drained I am right now. For the first time I have seriously considered dropping a class. Every time I'd entertained the thought before I could never convince myself there were enough good reasons, now I'm trying to remember why I can't and how it would be a waste of the time I've put into it already this semester. Living with Amelia is ok, but living with the girl's is much better and I miss it. Then last week I had migraine symptoms all week and the pain for several days while trying to write a critical analysis of Angels in America. I think I need a vacation. A REAL vacation, not just going home or spending a day or two on a tight schedule. I want to go someplace where I can just be and do what I want when I want with whom I want. Jes has a cabin in Pen. and I really want to go ASAP. No TV. No cell phone. No internet. Just me and my friends and nature and whatever crafts/books/games we bring with us. Hopefully having my own place this summer and not being stuck in the energy black hole that is my family's house or in their ever present daily drama will help recharge me to get through the last year of my Master's work. I think it will be fantastic as long as I can get a job to pay my rent.