Fanmix: The Long Game (Kirk/Spock for STBB)
When I realized I'd be making a mix for striped_fic/waketosleep's STBB fic, Big Me (But It's You I Fell Into), I nearly squealed out loud in my living room, because that meant I'd be getting to read the story before y'all and that, folks, is exciting. And then I did squeal when I got my hands on the rough draft and realized that Happy Gilmore could probably be blamed for half of it.
This story did not disappoint. It is hilarious and FUN, with a core of sweetness balanced with an unhealthy amount of swearing. READ IT!
You don't need to be a Kirk/Spock shipper to enjoy it - the whole supporting cast is equally fantastic as the pairing (Winona & Bones especially). You don't need to know anything about golf, either - all I know about the sport is from Happy Gilmore and the minigolf range - which, incidentally, is about as much knowledge as Jim starts out with here too. :-D
Anyway, yeah, I loved the story, and I hope my mix, The Long Game, (which is generally redic, btw) is half as fun.
Masterlist for Big Me (But It's You I Fell Into)
Jim Kirk, a man of long drives and large personality, stumbles into a career in the PGA Tour. Fame, fortune and notoriety await him as Jim collects national media attention, groupies, a new best friend, the ire of the first lady of pro golf, and also, maybe, the love of his life.
(You should also check out the accompanying art by kamicom - she drew the adorable Kirk & Spock below!)
Streaming Option:
Download Options: mediafire or sendspace
Tracklist (spoilerific quotes ahoy!):
"I'm James T. Kirk," he said, shaking it, "and I came from a cornfield in Iowa to kick your ass at golf."
01| Color on the Walls (Don't Stop) - Foster the People
I'm a superman and it's my show
One shoe two gonna kick with my shoes
I'm going to kick until I need new shoes
02| Money (That's What I Want) - BackBeat
Give me money
That's what I want
Whole lot of money
03| Because I'm Awesome - The Dollyrots
I don't need you cause I'm neato and I beat you
'Cause I'm awesome
That's right
Things got kind of hectic for Jim after that.
04| Can't Stop - Red Hot Chili Peppers
Can't stop addicted to the shin dig
Cop top he says I'm gonna win big
"We should have a driving competition on the range, after," Jim said on the fourth, after watching Spock crank out a 297-yard drive. "I'll probably win, though, so I won't put money on it."
Spock ignored him.
05| You're Not In On The Joke - Cobra Starship
Baby, why so cold?
I'm super sweet
Sealed with a kiss
Don't get offended if there's something you miss
06| Green Onions - Booker T And The MGs
[Instrumental]
"Is Spock here this weekend?"
"He never plays this one," she said, and walked away.
"Hawaii in January must be too cold, too," he told the empty fairway.
07| Horchata - Vampire Weekend
Winter's cold is too much to handle
Pincher crabs that pinch at your sandals
08| Nobody But Me - The Human Beinz
Ain't nobody doin' it but me, babe (Nobody but me)
Well, let me tell you nobody but nobody but me
"You know, we looked into it," said Hikaru, "and you seem to be the first pro golfer to have an unofficial fan club."
"There are t-shirts," offered Jim. "A woman named Gaila makes them."
09| Famous - Scouting For Girls
I want to be the star tonight,
And complain about fame in a story I sell to the news.
10| This Boy - Franz Ferdinand
It seems this boy's bathed in ridicule
Too foward, way too physical
It's time that I had another
11| Stuck in the Middle With You - Stealers Wheel
Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.
"I had a hankering to watch some professional golfers. Seen any around?"
Jim grinned. You had to appreciate assholery of that caliber.
12| Knock Me Down - Red Hot Chili Peppers
If you see me getting mighty
If you see me getting high
Knock me down
13| You Made Me Like It - 1990s
I got a red light turning back to amber
Green light
You made me like it
14| Go Faster - The Black Crowes
You can't stop
Or I will pass ya,
If you slow down
I will outlast ya
But when you're down
You won't find me laughing
"You played quite well today," said Spock when they got close enough to talk.
"Thanks," said Jim.
"He watched you play six holes today," Bones muttered in Jim’s ear. Jim blinked.
15| Growing On Me - The Darkness
You're really growing on me
(Or am I growing on you?)
You're really growing on me
(Or am I growing on you?)
Any fool can see
No ‘dating seriously’ in two years for Spock had probably meant not much of a sex life, it dawned on Jim, and he braced himself.
16. Rockmaninoff (Prelude in C-Sharp Minor) - Jon Schmidt
[Instrumental]
17. Love You Madly - Cake
I don't want to think about it
I don't want to talk about it
When I kiss your lips
Jim woke up the next morning with a long arm thrown across his stomach and still wasn’t sure of much, but he was willing to revisit the genius thing.
18. Stupidly Happy - XTC
I'm stupidly happy
Like the words to that song
I'm stupidly happy
No nothing not wrong
19| Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy - Queen
Ooh love - ooh loverboy
What're you doin' tonight, hey boy
Set my alarm, turn on my charm
That's because I'm a good old-fashioned lover boy
20| All My Friends - Land Of Talk
Fucking around
Pretending there's a problem
Figure it out
"Fuck," said Jim, and walked out of the room.
"Leave him alone for a while," he heard her say as he stalked toward the stairs. "He’s got some things he needs to work out in his head."
21| Benediction - The Weakerthans
Guess I'll never be the one to defeat desire in song.
Here's a marker, here's my naked skin, our Exhibit A.
Put a small x where I lost my way.
22| Waste - Foster the People
And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can
And every day that you want to wake up, that you want to wake, you can
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah
I'll help you see it through because I just really want to be with you
For some reason, staring at his keys lying on the nightstand helped motivate him out of bed and into the shower.
23| Rock And Roll Part 2 - Gary Glitter
[Instrumental]
24| Runnin' Down A Dream - Tom Petty
I felt so good like anything was possible
I hit cruise control and rubbed my eyes
The last three days the rain was un-stoppable
It was always cold, no sunshine
It was fucking ridiculous, and Jim felt himself relax so suddenly that it was like his strings had been cut.
25| Smells Stronger (Nirvana vs. Daft Punk) - Party Ben
Work It Harder Make It Better
Do It Faster, Makes Us Stronger
(Hello, hello, hello, hello, how low?)
26| Spotlight (Oh Nostalgia) - Patrick Stump
Oh nostalgia, I don't need you any more
'Cause the salad days are over and the meat is at my door
"It feels excellent," said Spock.
27| Under the Bright Lights - Empires
Everyone's right where they've got to be.
Under the bright lights, I want you.
Oh, don't you mind the war tonight.
We'll watch the sky exploding high.
"Jim Kirk," he said, grinning. "How are you going to top this at the next Masters?"
"Sorry," said Jim, "is that going to be your lead-in?"
"Maybe," said Pavel as they shook hands. "But seriously. Maybe some fireworks? A marriage proposal?"
Jim almost choked on his water.
28| Hard To Concentrate - Red Hot Chili Peppers
And, finally you have found something perfect
And, finally you have found
Yourself
This story did not disappoint. It is hilarious and FUN, with a core of sweetness balanced with an unhealthy amount of swearing. READ IT!
You don't need to be a Kirk/Spock shipper to enjoy it - the whole supporting cast is equally fantastic as the pairing (Winona & Bones especially). You don't need to know anything about golf, either - all I know about the sport is from Happy Gilmore and the minigolf range - which, incidentally, is about as much knowledge as Jim starts out with here too. :-D
Anyway, yeah, I loved the story, and I hope my mix, The Long Game, (which is generally redic, btw) is half as fun.
Masterlist for Big Me (But It's You I Fell Into)
Jim Kirk, a man of long drives and large personality, stumbles into a career in the PGA Tour. Fame, fortune and notoriety await him as Jim collects national media attention, groupies, a new best friend, the ire of the first lady of pro golf, and also, maybe, the love of his life.
(You should also check out the accompanying art by kamicom - she drew the adorable Kirk & Spock below!)
Streaming Option:
Download Options: mediafire or sendspace
Tracklist (spoilerific quotes ahoy!):
"I'm James T. Kirk," he said, shaking it, "and I came from a cornfield in Iowa to kick your ass at golf."
01| Color on the Walls (Don't Stop) - Foster the People
I'm a superman and it's my show
One shoe two gonna kick with my shoes
I'm going to kick until I need new shoes
02| Money (That's What I Want) - BackBeat
Give me money
That's what I want
Whole lot of money
03| Because I'm Awesome - The Dollyrots
I don't need you cause I'm neato and I beat you
'Cause I'm awesome
That's right
Things got kind of hectic for Jim after that.
04| Can't Stop - Red Hot Chili Peppers
Can't stop addicted to the shin dig
Cop top he says I'm gonna win big
"We should have a driving competition on the range, after," Jim said on the fourth, after watching Spock crank out a 297-yard drive. "I'll probably win, though, so I won't put money on it."
Spock ignored him.
05| You're Not In On The Joke - Cobra Starship
Baby, why so cold?
I'm super sweet
Sealed with a kiss
Don't get offended if there's something you miss
06| Green Onions - Booker T And The MGs
[Instrumental]
"Is Spock here this weekend?"
"He never plays this one," she said, and walked away.
"Hawaii in January must be too cold, too," he told the empty fairway.
07| Horchata - Vampire Weekend
Winter's cold is too much to handle
Pincher crabs that pinch at your sandals
08| Nobody But Me - The Human Beinz
Ain't nobody doin' it but me, babe (Nobody but me)
Well, let me tell you nobody but nobody but me
"You know, we looked into it," said Hikaru, "and you seem to be the first pro golfer to have an unofficial fan club."
"There are t-shirts," offered Jim. "A woman named Gaila makes them."
09| Famous - Scouting For Girls
I want to be the star tonight,
And complain about fame in a story I sell to the news.
10| This Boy - Franz Ferdinand
It seems this boy's bathed in ridicule
Too foward, way too physical
It's time that I had another
11| Stuck in the Middle With You - Stealers Wheel
Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.
"I had a hankering to watch some professional golfers. Seen any around?"
Jim grinned. You had to appreciate assholery of that caliber.
12| Knock Me Down - Red Hot Chili Peppers
If you see me getting mighty
If you see me getting high
Knock me down
13| You Made Me Like It - 1990s
I got a red light turning back to amber
Green light
You made me like it
14| Go Faster - The Black Crowes
You can't stop
Or I will pass ya,
If you slow down
I will outlast ya
But when you're down
You won't find me laughing
"You played quite well today," said Spock when they got close enough to talk.
"Thanks," said Jim.
"He watched you play six holes today," Bones muttered in Jim’s ear. Jim blinked.
15| Growing On Me - The Darkness
You're really growing on me
(Or am I growing on you?)
You're really growing on me
(Or am I growing on you?)
Any fool can see
No ‘dating seriously’ in two years for Spock had probably meant not much of a sex life, it dawned on Jim, and he braced himself.
16. Rockmaninoff (Prelude in C-Sharp Minor) - Jon Schmidt
[Instrumental]
17. Love You Madly - Cake
I don't want to think about it
I don't want to talk about it
When I kiss your lips
Jim woke up the next morning with a long arm thrown across his stomach and still wasn’t sure of much, but he was willing to revisit the genius thing.
18. Stupidly Happy - XTC
I'm stupidly happy
Like the words to that song
I'm stupidly happy
No nothing not wrong
19| Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy - Queen
Ooh love - ooh loverboy
What're you doin' tonight, hey boy
Set my alarm, turn on my charm
That's because I'm a good old-fashioned lover boy
20| All My Friends - Land Of Talk
Fucking around
Pretending there's a problem
Figure it out
"Fuck," said Jim, and walked out of the room.
"Leave him alone for a while," he heard her say as he stalked toward the stairs. "He’s got some things he needs to work out in his head."
21| Benediction - The Weakerthans
Guess I'll never be the one to defeat desire in song.
Here's a marker, here's my naked skin, our Exhibit A.
Put a small x where I lost my way.
22| Waste - Foster the People
And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can
And every day that you want to wake up, that you want to wake, you can
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah
I'll help you see it through because I just really want to be with you
For some reason, staring at his keys lying on the nightstand helped motivate him out of bed and into the shower.
23| Rock And Roll Part 2 - Gary Glitter
[Instrumental]
24| Runnin' Down A Dream - Tom Petty
I felt so good like anything was possible
I hit cruise control and rubbed my eyes
The last three days the rain was un-stoppable
It was always cold, no sunshine
It was fucking ridiculous, and Jim felt himself relax so suddenly that it was like his strings had been cut.
25| Smells Stronger (Nirvana vs. Daft Punk) - Party Ben
Work It Harder Make It Better
Do It Faster, Makes Us Stronger
(Hello, hello, hello, hello, how low?)
26| Spotlight (Oh Nostalgia) - Patrick Stump
Oh nostalgia, I don't need you any more
'Cause the salad days are over and the meat is at my door
"It feels excellent," said Spock.
27| Under the Bright Lights - Empires
Everyone's right where they've got to be.
Under the bright lights, I want you.
Oh, don't you mind the war tonight.
We'll watch the sky exploding high.
"Jim Kirk," he said, grinning. "How are you going to top this at the next Masters?"
"Sorry," said Jim, "is that going to be your lead-in?"
"Maybe," said Pavel as they shook hands. "But seriously. Maybe some fireworks? A marriage proposal?"
Jim almost choked on his water.
28| Hard To Concentrate - Red Hot Chili Peppers
And, finally you have found something perfect
And, finally you have found
Yourself