"The city is my playground"
Before going into this all, I would like to preface it by mentioning that the quote that is also the title of this entry was said by Danny Landau while on the way to David Fell's house the other day. The image conjured of the city of Manhattan being a playground pretty much sums up my entire week/weekend. Seeing just about everyone I know from camp/Heschel/Ramaz/Manhattan in general was amazing.
Wednesday, Oct. 6
Woke up, and went shopping for pants with Nachum. It was pretty fun, cuz he's Scottish. When we were in the car leaving the store, he actually asked me if I was gay. I panicked and started making up excuses that mainly consisted of made up words. Just kidding, I'm not actually gay. But I explained to him that having tight gold pants and a pink blouse does not make me a homosexual. I hope he was convinced. Then he drove me to Ben's house. We hung out for a bit. The usual. We listened to some good music, smoked some good chronic. Whatever. Then we left for the train station. I met Lynda there, and we took the train into Manhattan. Then up to the West Side. Fast forward to that night. Me, Shuki, Miller, Elan, and Gedaliah, along with Shuki's family went to this guy's sukkah. It was pretty nice. crazy Brazilian food, and lotsa political debates. That night was ok, just the 5 of us at Shuki's.
Thursday, Oct. 7 (Simchas Torah)
MORNING
Woke up and went to Anshei Chesed, saw a ridiculous amount of people, like Moose, back left 2004, and ELIANA FISCHMAN! Afterwards, we went to Shuki's and hung out for a couple of hours before getting ready for the big night
EVENING
We left for Ramat Orah with Tepper, Kurland, and Fisher around 6. I saw Zolin on the way there, and told him to hang around for the festivities of the evening, so little did Tali Arbit know, it was I who made that possible. After the services, the festivities began at Ramat Orah, and the smelly black hat Juden from Brooklyn came in. These guys were sweaty and already smelled of alcohol, they were pretty gross. One successfully coaxed me into joining their ridiculous "conga line-esque" group. After it got too intense (and the smell got too unbearable), we left for Shuki's. There we had a small repast, and waited for the girls of B19 to show up. Soon, our group consisted of myself, Shuki, Fisher, Elan, Miller, Tepper, Kurland, Gedaliah, Alana, Michelle, Yael, Becca, Gav, Lauren, Abby, Emily, and Shanken. Everyone except for Rachel Jacobs (I was pretty disappointed). We then walked downtown and stopped at this shteeble for Elan to get his groove on with some other really religious guys. Most of us stayed outside cuz the girls weren't welcome inside, not having penises and whatnot. Then Frans called and told us to stay there so him and Howard could come and join us. Of course I forgot that we were supposed to wait, and we went further down to OZ (Ohev Zedek). I don't quite remember that one, but at one point, I was walking with Alana, and she was copying my every move. Something had to be done about this. So I wanted to see how persistent she would be, and how committed she was to copying me. I then started walking in the opposite direction, away from everyone else, and she followed. After walking about two blocks in the wrong direction, we both decided that we had to get back to the group, and eventually found them. But it was fun. Then we got to BJ. Which actually stands for B'nei Jeshren. At that point, all hell broke loose. I saw Eddie, and we embraced, it was awesome. There were so many people there, like Faith and Andres. By the way, Faith was looking mighty fine that night. Once there, I basically saw all of Heschel and Camp Ramah. It was insane. Then we went to Carlebach, which had a ridiculous amount of people hanging out outside. That was alot of fun. At one point, me and Eddie found this tv. So we figured we'd watch something. Friends was on! So we watched it on the ground outside of Carlebach. Then, some guy took the tv away and brought it 10 feet over to where he was sitting. If that wasn't enough, Sarah Sokel's purse got stolen by some guy. So I chased him down the block towards Riverside, and after catching up with him, kicked his ass and got the purse back. Then I brought it back to Sarah, and I was a hero. It was awesome. But upon my return, I saw the guy who had our tv kicking it around. Probably cuz they didn't even have the remote. Actually, the tv was never plugged in. Eddie and I just sat on the ground staring at the blank screen. Also, noone stole Sarah's purse. In fact, I stole it, ran down the block, got tired, and walked back. But those guys really did take our tv. Not long after was my little incident with Michal. She was sitting with this guy, so I figured I'd sit with them. Not intending to make things awkward. Alright, it was my intention, but I did it out of love. I sat on Michal's lap, but she is small, and couldn't handle it. So the other guy invited me to sit on his lap. So I did. But then it got weird, and I left. But he was a nice guy. Later I found out he was a groper. But it's all good. Being completely sober and not high, I decided to go to West Side Institutional with Alana, Michelle, Zeke, Jordan, and Chusid. We finally found it, but the door with the alcohizzle was locked, and I did not know what to do. After deciding that half empty bottles weren't too grimy to drink from, I had half of a bottle of this wine. Believe it or not, it did the job. And thus begins the distorted state of mind that would be the rest of my night. I waited for Alana and Michelle outside the bathroom there, and then went in to the Men's room to relieve myself. When I came out, they still weren't out, so I waited for another 15-20 minutes. Then Mike and Abbaye (who are awesome), came to my rescue, and thought that they weren't even there to begin with. They were gonna walk back with me. Halfway down the block, I looked to the left, and there were the people who went with me. They were drinking snapple. Or so I thought. Then we walked back to Carlebach, and I got frustrated and mad, cuz I thought Michelle and Alana had to take care of me cuz I was drunk, and I was a burden to them. But it was all a misunderstanding. Anyway, we got back to Carlebach, and the party was sorta dying down. I spent most of the time hanging out with Emily and her friends. By the way, I am in love with Emily. The party was moving from W 79th to Shuki's, and I would have to walk uptown like 30 blocks. Emily and her two friends walked with me. I told them of my epic adventures and escapade with marijuana and it was lovely. At Shuki's, I changed into the gold pants and joined the massive orgy of people in Shuki's room. Tepper and Jenny (who I think like eachother), were on Shuki's old bunk bed in the corner, far away from everyone else. I decided to join them in their bed, but that just made things kinda weird. So I left. Then me and Frans went downstairs to smoke a little. I am gonna end that here, cuz I don't remember what else happened after that.
Friday, October 8th
In the morning, we went to Anshei Chesed, again. This time, there were ridiculous hakafot. It was also not uncommon for the people of that shul to drink while doing the hakafot. In the Sukkah, there was a table full of alcohol. So ya know, we had a little to drink. Miller, on the other hand, had ALOT to drink. 14 shots of Johnny Walker by himself. The kid was piss drunk. Now Miller, is the most annoying person when he is drunk. He was fucking insane. Shuki and I had to take care of him while we walked back to Shuki's house. On the way back, he started goose stepping, and it was a bitch to try and stop him. Also, we saw Alex Vizotsky on his way back from school, and Miller started talking about his testicles. Chances are, if we weren't there, he would have kicked Miller's ass. When we got back to Shuki's house, we tried to get him to go to sleep, but he didn't. It was funny cuz Shuki's mom was making fun of him with us the whole time. He tried telling us all something in hebrew about his father, but we realized he wasn't actually saying anything. Yael, Becca, Michelle, and Alana came over with Sontag. Frans and David also came over earlier. We all sat around in Shuki's room. I walked Elan to Andrew's house, who is also a good kid. Later that evening, me, Shuki, Gedaliah, Miller. and David went to Etan's for dinner. Danny came over when we were still at Etan's, and eventually me and him left with David to go to the East side. There was this really hot lady on the bus that sat right in front of us, cuz we were standing, and I think she was laughing at the things I/we said along with the old lady sitting next to her. It was pretty ridiculous. We rented Mean Girls on the way back, and then Yael, Becca, Michelle, and Alana came over to David's. It was fun. At one point, everyone left me alone in the living room watching Mean Girls with David's 13 year old sister Rachel. It got kinda weird after like 10 minutes though. Cuz everyone was in David's room. Everyone eventually left, and it was just us once again.
Saturday, October 9th
Woke up at David's, and he wasn't there cuz he went to shul. When he came back, we watched Mean Girls in its entirety. AWESOME movie. At like 5 we had Sammy Mernick's bootleg minchah bar mitzvah service, so the Fell's and myself went downtown to go there. Danny also came, and we had fun. By the way, Sammy did a pretty bad job. Afterwards, Me, David, and Danny walked to the salvation army place to try and get me a kickass shirt to go with my gold pants. Little did Danny know I wanted to get the shirt to wear to his "surprise" party. No such luck. We left, and started walking to the subway. The gears had to be set in motion for the surprise party, and I called Michal, and she told Danny he had to go back to his house. He finally left, and David and I went back to change. I wore my supercool gold pants, and it was pretty hot. I loved walking down the street in my gold pants while listening to "I shot the sheriff." Like fucking 70's style. We got to Hooters a little late, but sure enough, everyone was there. Michal, Melanie, Lynda, Nicole, Samantha, Etan, Jacob Doctoroff, Gdaly, Shuki, Gedaliah, Yael, LARA (the new love of my life), Liviya, and Emily were all there (my apologies if I have left anyone out). Finally, Danny showed up with Julia, who I still don't quite know. The company was incredible, but the waitresses were nothing special. It shoudl've been renamed "Women With Regular Size Breasts." Cuz let's face it, I was not quite impressed by the degree of Hootersness and chestitude of the bitches there. Later, Tepper, Alana, Michelle, Becca, Lauren, and Fisher showed up. ANDREW LITWIN ALSO CAME, AND HE IS THE MAN. Since most of them weren't actually invited, they left for a while. After the food, we left. I posed for some fabulous pictures with these statues with "golden" skin outside of Hooters. My pants were the same color, and I blended in marvelously. Our massive group went to Danny's house, which, coincidentally, was like 3 blocks away. At Danny's, the festivities began, and it was seriously like an orgy of people. The pictures should be available soon if Danny ever stops being gay and posts them. To sum it all up, it was incredibly fun. And I enjoyed it very much. I especially enjoyed hanging out with my two new favorite people, Emily and Lara, and even some old favorite people such as Michal. It's amazing how all these people managed to come together all because they know Danny. As the party started to die down, David, Emily, Jacob, Lara, and I went uptown towards David's. Only Lara didn't come to David's house. We watched Mean Girls again. That's the third time. After Millie Fell filled the house with smoke from popcorn, we were able to watch the movie. Then Emily left. Jacob was also sleeping over, and at the time needed contact lens solution. I myself was a little hungry, so we both set off to find a 24 hour pharmacy of the like. We walked all the way down to 72nd and found nothing. After almost giving up, we realized that on the other side of David's block was a CVS open 24 hours. Jacob got his contact solution, and I got three bags of gummys. We got back to David's, and he had fallen asleep and didn't notice that we had left. We eventually went to sleep.
Sunday, October 10th
In the morning, me and David went downtown to Sammy's bar mitzvah brunch. We chilled with Frans, Sontag, Shuki, and Tepper. Also, Teddy Sherril was there, along with Ben Hershenfeld and Eric Brief. The brunch was nice. Afterwards, I went back to David's to get my stuff, and then came to Frans' where i hung out til my rents came to get me. And that, my friends, was my week/weekend.
I also think this may very well be the longest entry I have ever written. Christ. Much love to all.
Plotkin
Wednesday, Oct. 6
Woke up, and went shopping for pants with Nachum. It was pretty fun, cuz he's Scottish. When we were in the car leaving the store, he actually asked me if I was gay. I panicked and started making up excuses that mainly consisted of made up words. Just kidding, I'm not actually gay. But I explained to him that having tight gold pants and a pink blouse does not make me a homosexual. I hope he was convinced. Then he drove me to Ben's house. We hung out for a bit. The usual. We listened to some good music, smoked some good chronic. Whatever. Then we left for the train station. I met Lynda there, and we took the train into Manhattan. Then up to the West Side. Fast forward to that night. Me, Shuki, Miller, Elan, and Gedaliah, along with Shuki's family went to this guy's sukkah. It was pretty nice. crazy Brazilian food, and lotsa political debates. That night was ok, just the 5 of us at Shuki's.
Thursday, Oct. 7 (Simchas Torah)
MORNING
Woke up and went to Anshei Chesed, saw a ridiculous amount of people, like Moose, back left 2004, and ELIANA FISCHMAN! Afterwards, we went to Shuki's and hung out for a couple of hours before getting ready for the big night
EVENING
We left for Ramat Orah with Tepper, Kurland, and Fisher around 6. I saw Zolin on the way there, and told him to hang around for the festivities of the evening, so little did Tali Arbit know, it was I who made that possible. After the services, the festivities began at Ramat Orah, and the smelly black hat Juden from Brooklyn came in. These guys were sweaty and already smelled of alcohol, they were pretty gross. One successfully coaxed me into joining their ridiculous "conga line-esque" group. After it got too intense (and the smell got too unbearable), we left for Shuki's. There we had a small repast, and waited for the girls of B19 to show up. Soon, our group consisted of myself, Shuki, Fisher, Elan, Miller, Tepper, Kurland, Gedaliah, Alana, Michelle, Yael, Becca, Gav, Lauren, Abby, Emily, and Shanken. Everyone except for Rachel Jacobs (I was pretty disappointed). We then walked downtown and stopped at this shteeble for Elan to get his groove on with some other really religious guys. Most of us stayed outside cuz the girls weren't welcome inside, not having penises and whatnot. Then Frans called and told us to stay there so him and Howard could come and join us. Of course I forgot that we were supposed to wait, and we went further down to OZ (Ohev Zedek). I don't quite remember that one, but at one point, I was walking with Alana, and she was copying my every move. Something had to be done about this. So I wanted to see how persistent she would be, and how committed she was to copying me. I then started walking in the opposite direction, away from everyone else, and she followed. After walking about two blocks in the wrong direction, we both decided that we had to get back to the group, and eventually found them. But it was fun. Then we got to BJ. Which actually stands for B'nei Jeshren. At that point, all hell broke loose. I saw Eddie, and we embraced, it was awesome. There were so many people there, like Faith and Andres. By the way, Faith was looking mighty fine that night. Once there, I basically saw all of Heschel and Camp Ramah. It was insane. Then we went to Carlebach, which had a ridiculous amount of people hanging out outside. That was alot of fun. At one point, me and Eddie found this tv. So we figured we'd watch something. Friends was on! So we watched it on the ground outside of Carlebach. Then, some guy took the tv away and brought it 10 feet over to where he was sitting. If that wasn't enough, Sarah Sokel's purse got stolen by some guy. So I chased him down the block towards Riverside, and after catching up with him, kicked his ass and got the purse back. Then I brought it back to Sarah, and I was a hero. It was awesome. But upon my return, I saw the guy who had our tv kicking it around. Probably cuz they didn't even have the remote. Actually, the tv was never plugged in. Eddie and I just sat on the ground staring at the blank screen. Also, noone stole Sarah's purse. In fact, I stole it, ran down the block, got tired, and walked back. But those guys really did take our tv. Not long after was my little incident with Michal. She was sitting with this guy, so I figured I'd sit with them. Not intending to make things awkward. Alright, it was my intention, but I did it out of love. I sat on Michal's lap, but she is small, and couldn't handle it. So the other guy invited me to sit on his lap. So I did. But then it got weird, and I left. But he was a nice guy. Later I found out he was a groper. But it's all good. Being completely sober and not high, I decided to go to West Side Institutional with Alana, Michelle, Zeke, Jordan, and Chusid. We finally found it, but the door with the alcohizzle was locked, and I did not know what to do. After deciding that half empty bottles weren't too grimy to drink from, I had half of a bottle of this wine. Believe it or not, it did the job. And thus begins the distorted state of mind that would be the rest of my night. I waited for Alana and Michelle outside the bathroom there, and then went in to the Men's room to relieve myself. When I came out, they still weren't out, so I waited for another 15-20 minutes. Then Mike and Abbaye (who are awesome), came to my rescue, and thought that they weren't even there to begin with. They were gonna walk back with me. Halfway down the block, I looked to the left, and there were the people who went with me. They were drinking snapple. Or so I thought. Then we walked back to Carlebach, and I got frustrated and mad, cuz I thought Michelle and Alana had to take care of me cuz I was drunk, and I was a burden to them. But it was all a misunderstanding. Anyway, we got back to Carlebach, and the party was sorta dying down. I spent most of the time hanging out with Emily and her friends. By the way, I am in love with Emily. The party was moving from W 79th to Shuki's, and I would have to walk uptown like 30 blocks. Emily and her two friends walked with me. I told them of my epic adventures and escapade with marijuana and it was lovely. At Shuki's, I changed into the gold pants and joined the massive orgy of people in Shuki's room. Tepper and Jenny (who I think like eachother), were on Shuki's old bunk bed in the corner, far away from everyone else. I decided to join them in their bed, but that just made things kinda weird. So I left. Then me and Frans went downstairs to smoke a little. I am gonna end that here, cuz I don't remember what else happened after that.
Friday, October 8th
In the morning, we went to Anshei Chesed, again. This time, there were ridiculous hakafot. It was also not uncommon for the people of that shul to drink while doing the hakafot. In the Sukkah, there was a table full of alcohol. So ya know, we had a little to drink. Miller, on the other hand, had ALOT to drink. 14 shots of Johnny Walker by himself. The kid was piss drunk. Now Miller, is the most annoying person when he is drunk. He was fucking insane. Shuki and I had to take care of him while we walked back to Shuki's house. On the way back, he started goose stepping, and it was a bitch to try and stop him. Also, we saw Alex Vizotsky on his way back from school, and Miller started talking about his testicles. Chances are, if we weren't there, he would have kicked Miller's ass. When we got back to Shuki's house, we tried to get him to go to sleep, but he didn't. It was funny cuz Shuki's mom was making fun of him with us the whole time. He tried telling us all something in hebrew about his father, but we realized he wasn't actually saying anything. Yael, Becca, Michelle, and Alana came over with Sontag. Frans and David also came over earlier. We all sat around in Shuki's room. I walked Elan to Andrew's house, who is also a good kid. Later that evening, me, Shuki, Gedaliah, Miller. and David went to Etan's for dinner. Danny came over when we were still at Etan's, and eventually me and him left with David to go to the East side. There was this really hot lady on the bus that sat right in front of us, cuz we were standing, and I think she was laughing at the things I/we said along with the old lady sitting next to her. It was pretty ridiculous. We rented Mean Girls on the way back, and then Yael, Becca, Michelle, and Alana came over to David's. It was fun. At one point, everyone left me alone in the living room watching Mean Girls with David's 13 year old sister Rachel. It got kinda weird after like 10 minutes though. Cuz everyone was in David's room. Everyone eventually left, and it was just us once again.
Saturday, October 9th
Woke up at David's, and he wasn't there cuz he went to shul. When he came back, we watched Mean Girls in its entirety. AWESOME movie. At like 5 we had Sammy Mernick's bootleg minchah bar mitzvah service, so the Fell's and myself went downtown to go there. Danny also came, and we had fun. By the way, Sammy did a pretty bad job. Afterwards, Me, David, and Danny walked to the salvation army place to try and get me a kickass shirt to go with my gold pants. Little did Danny know I wanted to get the shirt to wear to his "surprise" party. No such luck. We left, and started walking to the subway. The gears had to be set in motion for the surprise party, and I called Michal, and she told Danny he had to go back to his house. He finally left, and David and I went back to change. I wore my supercool gold pants, and it was pretty hot. I loved walking down the street in my gold pants while listening to "I shot the sheriff." Like fucking 70's style. We got to Hooters a little late, but sure enough, everyone was there. Michal, Melanie, Lynda, Nicole, Samantha, Etan, Jacob Doctoroff, Gdaly, Shuki, Gedaliah, Yael, LARA (the new love of my life), Liviya, and Emily were all there (my apologies if I have left anyone out). Finally, Danny showed up with Julia, who I still don't quite know. The company was incredible, but the waitresses were nothing special. It shoudl've been renamed "Women With Regular Size Breasts." Cuz let's face it, I was not quite impressed by the degree of Hootersness and chestitude of the bitches there. Later, Tepper, Alana, Michelle, Becca, Lauren, and Fisher showed up. ANDREW LITWIN ALSO CAME, AND HE IS THE MAN. Since most of them weren't actually invited, they left for a while. After the food, we left. I posed for some fabulous pictures with these statues with "golden" skin outside of Hooters. My pants were the same color, and I blended in marvelously. Our massive group went to Danny's house, which, coincidentally, was like 3 blocks away. At Danny's, the festivities began, and it was seriously like an orgy of people. The pictures should be available soon if Danny ever stops being gay and posts them. To sum it all up, it was incredibly fun. And I enjoyed it very much. I especially enjoyed hanging out with my two new favorite people, Emily and Lara, and even some old favorite people such as Michal. It's amazing how all these people managed to come together all because they know Danny. As the party started to die down, David, Emily, Jacob, Lara, and I went uptown towards David's. Only Lara didn't come to David's house. We watched Mean Girls again. That's the third time. After Millie Fell filled the house with smoke from popcorn, we were able to watch the movie. Then Emily left. Jacob was also sleeping over, and at the time needed contact lens solution. I myself was a little hungry, so we both set off to find a 24 hour pharmacy of the like. We walked all the way down to 72nd and found nothing. After almost giving up, we realized that on the other side of David's block was a CVS open 24 hours. Jacob got his contact solution, and I got three bags of gummys. We got back to David's, and he had fallen asleep and didn't notice that we had left. We eventually went to sleep.
Sunday, October 10th
In the morning, me and David went downtown to Sammy's bar mitzvah brunch. We chilled with Frans, Sontag, Shuki, and Tepper. Also, Teddy Sherril was there, along with Ben Hershenfeld and Eric Brief. The brunch was nice. Afterwards, I went back to David's to get my stuff, and then came to Frans' where i hung out til my rents came to get me. And that, my friends, was my week/weekend.
I also think this may very well be the longest entry I have ever written. Christ. Much love to all.
Plotkin