Curse this heart of mine...
I just... why can't I not feel anything for awhile you know? Tonight I felt those familiar stirrings, that subtle ache that drives, pushing me to touch, to smell, to taste if I could.. I resisted, but just the mere fact that I felt what I did was..
I know what it is. I'm afraid.
Seems strange doesn't it? I've only been in one relationship... and a fairly successful one by most people's standards, but I really don't want to... have to feel the way I did before for another time. Cowardly I guess. I really don't understand how people can go through so many relationships so fast... it really boggles my mind.
The question is then, should I pursue it? I've never had so many options before... the idea both excites and terrifies me. Ah... let's just see how things work out. I'm tired of thinking things through.
I know what it is. I'm afraid.
Seems strange doesn't it? I've only been in one relationship... and a fairly successful one by most people's standards, but I really don't want to... have to feel the way I did before for another time. Cowardly I guess. I really don't understand how people can go through so many relationships so fast... it really boggles my mind.
The question is then, should I pursue it? I've never had so many options before... the idea both excites and terrifies me. Ah... let's just see how things work out. I'm tired of thinking things through.