ok
OK, i have decided to put wat i wrote on. So. . . .here it is.
I wish I could tell someone what i am going through. The only person that understands is not with me. I want help but I ont want to tell anyone at the same time. Wouldn't life be better without food? You wouldnt have to worry about your weight and people judging you becuz the food might match to the fat. You could concentrate on more things that matter. My grades ahve dropped becuz of my concerns. WHen I got upset or depressed about soemthing, I begin to mess up my prioritys and instead of doing homework, I will live the night online, listeing to music, watching tv, and talking on the phone. I wish I could meet someone that can COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND what i am thinking in my head. People will just judge.They blow things out of proportion and jump down my throat about it. "What your doing is wrong" they say. Yea I know it is wrong but when you drink, before you do it, dont u think twice? Yet you still go through with it and u suffer the consequences. Then most people will do it again wont they? Then why when i trust in someone to let my secret out, do i have to get a lecture? IM NOT STUPID. Is it a bad thing to want my life back. I wish I had all the answers. Or at least some of them. But other then being an intellegent and complelty together person, I am a completly confused person and modd changes along wiht my brain. Y cant i be normal? Y cant i ahve a normal life and not ahve to worry about things that shouldnt matter. That dont matter. Becoming perfect is such a struggle yet the outcome isnt wat you want. I will never be wat i want. How does god choose which people gets to be perfect and gets the perfect body?
I wish I could tell someone what i am going through. The only person that understands is not with me. I want help but I ont want to tell anyone at the same time. Wouldn't life be better without food? You wouldnt have to worry about your weight and people judging you becuz the food might match to the fat. You could concentrate on more things that matter. My grades ahve dropped becuz of my concerns. WHen I got upset or depressed about soemthing, I begin to mess up my prioritys and instead of doing homework, I will live the night online, listeing to music, watching tv, and talking on the phone. I wish I could meet someone that can COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND what i am thinking in my head. People will just judge.They blow things out of proportion and jump down my throat about it. "What your doing is wrong" they say. Yea I know it is wrong but when you drink, before you do it, dont u think twice? Yet you still go through with it and u suffer the consequences. Then most people will do it again wont they? Then why when i trust in someone to let my secret out, do i have to get a lecture? IM NOT STUPID. Is it a bad thing to want my life back. I wish I had all the answers. Or at least some of them. But other then being an intellegent and complelty together person, I am a completly confused person and modd changes along wiht my brain. Y cant i be normal? Y cant i ahve a normal life and not ahve to worry about things that shouldnt matter. That dont matter. Becoming perfect is such a struggle yet the outcome isnt wat you want. I will never be wat i want. How does god choose which people gets to be perfect and gets the perfect body?