I gotta get myself back to Hogwarts, I've gotta get myself back to school
Where have I been this past month? Why, allow me to illustrate via the numbers:
Number of days since I was last at Union: 26
Total number of miles traveled: 1,915
Cost of New York City, New York to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania train ticket: $52.00
Cost of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania to Washington, D.C. train ticket: $95.00
Cost of Washington, D.C. to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania train ticket: $69.00
Amount spent dicking around with the D.C. metro system: $15.00
Total amount of time thinking that the D.C. metro system is completely worthless: Too much
Number of bottles of Cliquot champagne consumed at New Year's Eve pre-party: 4
Average age of country-club member attending the New Year's Eve gala: 47
Average age of Erin, Rebecca, Taywna and I: 25.75
Total number of hours spent on a train: 12.5
Total cost of gas: $130.00
Total number of hours spent in a car: 23
Total number of cigarettes smoked: 60
Number of packs of cigarettes bought in Pennsylvania: 6
Average cost of a pack of cigarettes bought in Pennsylvania: $4.47
Money saved in buying cigarettes in Pennsylvania vis-a-vis New York City: $45.18
How fucking excited I am to sleep in my own bed tonight: V.V.V.V.
Number of days since I was last at Union: 26
Total number of miles traveled: 1,915
Cost of New York City, New York to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania train ticket: $52.00
Cost of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania to Washington, D.C. train ticket: $95.00
Cost of Washington, D.C. to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania train ticket: $69.00
Amount spent dicking around with the D.C. metro system: $15.00
Total amount of time thinking that the D.C. metro system is completely worthless: Too much
Number of bottles of Cliquot champagne consumed at New Year's Eve pre-party: 4
Average age of country-club member attending the New Year's Eve gala: 47
Average age of Erin, Rebecca, Taywna and I: 25.75
Total number of hours spent on a train: 12.5
Total cost of gas: $130.00
Total number of hours spent in a car: 23
Total number of cigarettes smoked: 60
Number of packs of cigarettes bought in Pennsylvania: 6
Average cost of a pack of cigarettes bought in Pennsylvania: $4.47
Money saved in buying cigarettes in Pennsylvania vis-a-vis New York City: $45.18
How fucking excited I am to sleep in my own bed tonight: V.V.V.V.