thinking. . . . .
sometimes i think it was for the better sometimes i wonder how it would be now. . . . but i mean dont u ever think of how it was?? honestly i do ALL the time. . . everytime i find myself talking to "the boy" almost always i have a story or a memory that we made. . . and then talking about one memory i think of more and i miss it. . . i miss how close of friends we were, i miss all the fun we had, all the sleepovers and long drives to other states LOL, driving wit the top down to our techo music, singin as loud as we can while people stare, how we wouldnt take shit from no one because we knew that we had eachothers back. . . . we always did everything together and never left eachother out. . . we werent selfish with eacother it was always for the both of us not jus one of us. . .it was equal. i mean dont u ever think about it, honestly? it seemed like i knew you forever and in reality it was what only a yr not even, i never thought hat our friendship would end, especially for some stupid bitch who now both of us hate and wil never talk to again, how dumb! we were both dumb! and then we went our separate ways and sometimes it seems like we never were friends, the bestest of friends, someitmes like we didnt even know eachother, and it sucks! its even uncomfotable at times bc i wish i could act the same around u like i did when we were friends bc it was so much fun, but then i dont bc i dont know how you are now and if u still find the same shit funny that i did or whatever. . . . we knew eachother like we knew ourselves, we always had someone to go to, to trust, jus someone to listen to us. we shared everything, the driving, money, friends, secrets, u name it. yeah ive lost other best friends but it never bothered me as much, we were eachothers support system, god i bet i could write like 20 pages on just our memories alone! so many good that outweighed the few bad ones that we had but yet we still let one bad one ruin it all and look at us now. . . we barley even talk anymore, barley even see one another anymore unless its at work. how would it be now if we had stayed friends? i wonder. . . do u? i know this probably doesnt matter much to you but its jus what i am thinking about right now, i dunno ummm i gotta get goin lyl byes!!